Tween/Teen
- Tween/Teen Anyone feel that DH doesn't support you with your teen?...(more)
- DH is setting you up as the bitch mom. You’re Betty Draper.
- You need to be on the same page, but also can’t expect a kid to never eat junk or use screens.
- He’s building memories too
- OP here: I can see that, but DH is the "fun" parent and he and DS do "fun" things. I, on the other hand, have to be the "mean" parent and make sure that he doesn't...(more)
- He’s building memories too
- Tween/Teen How often does your teen lie?...(more)
- Blowing guys, etc.
- probably more than I'm willing to admit - even to myself
- i imagine often. i know i did - it was to create distance from my mom.
- She doesn’t as far as I know. 12yo went through a crazy lying phase like age 9-10.
- Nothing like that. No
- i lied a lot as a teen but then i grew up in an abusive alcoholic family and no one outside of the family knew. lying was a way of life for us. it is still my first instinct to...(more)
- Tween/Teen Long winter coats for boys...(more)
- they don't want ones that go below the knee--you can't move
- Below the knee? Shit--below the butt your movement is inhibited
- My parka goes below the knee and I can move just fine
- Have you ever seen a boy with a long coat ?
- Yeah I have actually
- how often are you playing on the playground at recess?
- How old is your dc? If he's playing at recess, don't do it. If he's not gay, don't do it.
- will you troglodytes stop with the gay insults?
- This is harsh but very true. If he's an outwardly gay fashionista kid - go for it. Anything else? Don't do it
- How often do you go sledding, etc?
- Have you ever seen a boy with a long coat ?
- Don’t do it.
- Why not?
- They will be teased. They don’t want to wear that kind of coat.
- Why would he be teased for wearing a coat like that?
- They will be teased. They don’t want to wear that kind of coat.
- Why not?
- I don't know any boy, young or old, that would wear that. Does he want this or you?
- right? they will be shamed if over the age of 5
- i doubt they'd be shamed, it just doesn't seem practical for a kid who's active and plays and runs and slides and stuff like that
- they will be shamed
- you know, kids are much nicer than their moms, in my experience. they're open minded, they are often clueless and just don't care about the nonsense you do.
- Sure, mentalcase
- I am nice. I am nicely telling you not to do this to your kid. Is it sensible to want to keep him warm? Yes. Buying him a long coat is not the answer. Talk to your kid
- I totally agree--he is going to hate it (plus they suffer much less from the cold than we do). Just ask him what coat he wants. But this is a fake to gt us going anyway
- yeah right
- you know, kids are much nicer than their moms, in my experience. they're open minded, they are often clueless and just don't care about the nonsense you do.
- they will be shamed
- i doubt they'd be shamed, it just doesn't seem practical for a kid who's active and plays and runs and slides and stuff like that
- I think he would be fine wearing it
- Don't think - ask. How old is he?
- right? they will be shamed if over the age of 5
- unless you live in Canada or Siberia, why?
- Because long coats are warmer
- no, they are not. where the fuck is he walking that he needs this
- 2 miles up hill... each way
- DAD? IS THAT YOU?
- 2 miles up hill... each way
- no, they are not. where the fuck is he walking that he needs this
- Because long coats are warmer
- Is he gay?
- Not a good comment
- Only a gay boy would consider wearing a long coat
- Not a good comment
- Gee, I wonder why you can't find that?
- Unless you live in Fargo, don't do this
- This has to be fake!
- I'll bet the Beckham boys wear long down coats
- They live in CA
- lollllll
- Like this?...(more)
- lololll
- they don't want ones that go below the knee--you can't move
- Tween/Teen Gift for DD's friend at sleepaway camp?...(more)
- Silly string, nail polish
- Good ones!
- Why were two posts deleted on this thread? They seemed rather innocent!
- This post has been deleted.
- This post has been deleted.
- Mad Libs
- Silly string, nail polish
- Tween/Teen - no subject -...(more)
- There is a decent amount
- np and also brearley mom - what does that mean?
- It means there are a decent amount of drugs. Just like every private school
- but at least they are not doing drugs with the public school kids. Count your blessings.
- Yes, god forbid that combination
- but at least they are not doing drugs with the public school kids. Count your blessings.
- It means there are a decent amount of drugs. Just like every private school
- np and also brearley mom - what does that mean?
- OP) can someone please help??
- talk to you dc not us.
- There is a decent amount
- Tween/Teen This post has been deleted.
- Tween/Teen What are the warmest winter boots....(more)
- say what you want but I LOVE my UGGS
- Are UGGS waterproof though?
- they have waterproof styles
- Are UGGS waterproof though?
- the waterproof uggs. I think the style is called adirondack. and you are shopping a bit early lol
- I know but I don’t want to wait until we actually need to be wearing the winter gear to buy it
- I would at least wait until september when all the new styles are out
- this, you are weirdly invested
- I just want to make sure that we’re ready for our first winter
- Wouldn’t it be a lot more expensive then?
- this, you are weirdly invested
- I would at least wait until september when all the new styles are out
- I know but I don’t want to wait until we actually need to be wearing the winter gear to buy it
- Pajar
- go to LL Bean
- NOT warm
- they have tons of different styles - definitely have warm boots
- no
- they have tons of different styles - definitely have warm boots
- agree - I have these and love them - similar to a model of sorels, but I find these to be more comfortable...(more)
- garbage
- NOT warm
- we have a house in vermont and Sorel is our go to boot
- Which type of sorel?
- joan of acadia. Also invest in smartwool socks.
- lol i mean joan of artic
- joan of acadia. Also invest in smartwool socks.
- not as warm as uggs
- Which type of sorel?
- You want Bogs. Classic High with handles. Tons of styles.
- I love mine. Rated to -30 below and they keep my feet warm and dry in deep snow when it's single digits.
- How much time do you spend outside in single digits?
- I love mine. Rated to -30 below and they keep my feet warm and dry in deep snow when it's single digits.
- knee high seems really hard to walk in
- my le canadienne are warm but never really last more than a season
- Why would you ever buy them again???
- I have two pairs and they've lasted for four and seven years so far! Very warm and waterproof and not hideous. Well worth the $$$
- say what you want but I LOVE my UGGS
- Tween/Teen Winter gear tips...(more)
- boots, thick socks, warm hat, warm gloves and a scarf! I lived in Montreal and holy shit was it cold there!!
- I haven’t bought boots yet or any other accessories, would there be any particular ones you recommend?
- I think that’s fine, long coat, high boots and good gloves. But don’t over-buy now.
- Haven’t found the right boots yet. Honestly feels like I’m under buying, I only got us coats and snow pants today.
- how old is she? I live in NH and I can tell you, if in high school and walking they won't wear the snowpants
- She’s 13 and going into 7th grade, why would she not wear snow pants?
- Hat, gloves, wool socks
- Would you recommend gloves rather than mittens?
- boots, thick socks, warm hat, warm gloves and a scarf! I lived in Montreal and holy shit was it cold there!!
- Tween/Teen Snow pants...(more)
- If she plays in the snow, bibs are better.
- - no subject -...(more)
- It's the sledding that gets you--snow up the back of the coat!
- - no subject -...(more)
- You don't want to wear a knee-length coat to play in the snow.
- - no subject -...(more)
- You don't want to wear a knee-length coat to play in the snow.
- - no subject -...(more)
- It's the sledding that gets you--snow up the back of the coat!
- - no subject -...(more)
- mine want just the pants, no bibs or suspenders. I like the ones they sell at costco or target every year
- I think they have suspenders that unzip
- see if lands end has sales right now
- If she plays in the snow, bibs are better.
- Tween/Teen How to make move easier on daughter...(more)
- Any day camps she can go to?
- this - meet some kids before school starts
- Can you do things to help her get familiar with the area? Maybe meet some kids her age?
- how old is she
- Weird, suburban Maine in the summer seems much nicer than urban Miami in the summer
- Where in Maine? I may have some ideas.
- - no subject -...(more)
- Any day camps she can go to?
- Tween/Teen This post has been deleted.
- Isn't it late to be thinking about this?
- This post has been deleted.
- Leaving aside whether it's a good idea, it's probably not a feasible idea.
- That’s 2 transitions in 2 years
- This post has been deleted.
- Maybe get her some professional help in managing her anxiety? My DD has anxiety, and she's taken it with her wherever she goes...changing schools isn't likely to solve the problem...(more)
- Exactly -- and St. Ann's is not a natural fit in this situation.
- This post has been deleted.
- what does her therapist say?
- Unless her grades/scores are amazing, St. Ann's is a very tough admit.
- This post has been deleted.
- Obivously, there's not a rhyme or reason to these things. They have very few spots for 10th grade. It's worth a shot, but it isn't a plan to manage her anxiety.
- np-look at what you wrote and wonder again why she has grade anxiety...
- dislike all you want, but the attitude is not helping.
- it will depend on how many spots are available and the competition...switiching comes with it's own problems, you know: social stress, for example
- This post has been deleted.
- If you really want a lower-key setting for her, you are going to have to look at schools that are off the YB-approved list.
- Isn't it late to be thinking about this?
- Tween/Teen The RNC convention is being held this year in Saint Petersburg
- Devin Nunnes and his comrades will be attending
- Russia or Florida
- Russia of course
- I thought Charlotte got it
- FLA or Russia?
- COOL! I want to go! TRUMP!!!!!!!
- Of course Wayne LaPierre will be there, he speaks fluent Russian
- Trump, Putin and Kim Jong-un are planning world domination.
- Aeroflot has a special discount for NRA members
- I heard Charlotte.
- No, Trump made a verbal agreement with Putin
- Tween/Teen Divorced with BF of a few years. I know he wants to live together when I am an empty nester which is soon. I am not sure, thoughts?
- I’d live with him
- Is he a good man?
- he is
- Can he pay half the bills ?
- yes, though I do own my place (mortgage) and he rents now
- So he will pay you rent - good for you
- not exactly sure how it would be structured but yes, he would definitely contribute
- He writes you a check for half monthly expenses - utilities taxes etc
- yes probably something like that, he is responsible/reasonable with money so I am not too worried about that
- He writes you a check for half monthly expenses - utilities taxes etc
- not exactly sure how it would be structured but yes, he would definitely contribute
- So he will pay you rent - good for you
- yes, though I do own my place (mortgage) and he rents now
- Meh, I’d want my space.
- I am pretty independent so this is one of the things I worry about
- Because once he moves in, it’s like going through a divorce to get him out.
- np. interesting point
- Actually it’s not - your house you tell him to leave
- i think this partially depends on the state and how long he has been living there, whether there is a formal lease, etc.
- Because once he moves in, it’s like going through a divorce to get him out.
- I am pretty independent so this is one of the things I worry about
- Tween/Teen Teens and cell phone indecency: What can a parent do?...(more)
- there is a space limit?
- space limit...(more)
- never noticed
- space limit...(more)
- are you guy?
- yes
- This post has been disliked 3 times. have your wife post then, creepy asshole
- np- op, ignore the troll. you are fine.
- This post has been disliked 3 times. have your wife post then, creepy asshole
- yes
- Okay. a few questions? How old is she? And what are your concerns?
- answer...(more)
- Dide you can’t figure this out? You are the parent. Sounds like she’s I. Control here.
- you need to talk to her, she's 16, she needs to understand the risks, especially if you have a real-life example to share with her
- I don't know what state you are in, but I don't think 16 would be considered a child. That said: sexting is a serious consideration. Ideally you should have taken her phone righta...(more)
- answer...(more)
- how old? I would not "scour her phone", I would have a conversation along the lines of - how would you feel if this photo/video was made available to all your friends?
- I seriously doubt that by the time op gets the phone that there will be anything incriminating on it. If she is smart she will have wiped it clean by then.
- OP is either an idiot or fake
- Who is OP?
- np: the goal isn't to catch her but to create an expectation that her phone is not private.
- OP is either an idiot or fake
- I seriously doubt that by the time op gets the phone that there will be anything incriminating on it. If she is smart she will have wiped it clean by then.
- Turn phones in at night from now on plus convo as per above
- You didn't take the phone and look?
- - no subject -...(more)
- or: Have her mom talk to her and sending pics or videos. The phone is unavailable to her after 8pm for the near future
- np: I don't think it's a good idea for him to potentially see a pic of his 16yo naked. I would have the mother look, if he must. It would be considerably more awkward for both,...(more)
- - no subject -...(more)
- Why was she allowed to keep the phone?
- she is 16 and uses the alarm and listens to music.
- Jesus. You people. She’s been doing this a long time I’m sure. Damage is done.
- buy her an alarm clock and a radio. Have a frank discussion with her about how reputations can be ruined by this behavior. It's an embarassing conversation but she needs to be...(more)
- she is 16 and uses the alarm and listens to music.
- I'd make her write a fucking mini research paper on the dangers of sexting. She'll find some serious shit
- Yes. And she can't have her phone back until it's done.
- there is a space limit?
- Tween/Teen Please don't troll. My daughter is 14. She and I have been so close all these years. She's doing that thing where she's pushing me away, which of course she should be doing...(more)
- Remember that you are still the biggest influence in her life. Be patient. The pushing should stop.
- I feel for you. From what I understand ( because I have a ds) they come back in college
- o my goodness. years.
- let's be optimistic... maybe you will be different.
- o my goodness. years.
- You need to give her space. By the time my DD turned 16 we started getting close again, some of the time anyway.
- how did you give her space?
- When she slammed the door of her room and wanted to be left alone I let her be. I found few opportune moments to have chats still, usually in the car or at dinner with just the...(more)
- how did you give her space?
- You mean flame, not troll
- Tween/Teen Need advice. Friends want to do things with me one on one but don’t include me in group events - birthday lunches, drinks on a Friday etc. why? What am I doing wrong?
- are they super cliquish together?
- They are
- i have a group like this, im the only one whos kid isnt in theater, and Im the onlyone that works.
- Op: does it bug you? I know I shouldn’t let it bother me but I do
- it does a little bit, for like the 3 min when I see it on social media; but we do all do other things as a group from time to time, so it stings less. If I were always excluded,...(more)
- Op: does it bug you? I know I shouldn’t let it bother me but I do
- i hate feeling left out, but there are times when i just want a small and specific vibe...
- You aren;t doing anything wrong. I've had this happen and it is odd stuff - like a group goes out for a bday and I am hear about it after and I think - wow, I was not invited. I...(more)
- yes but i find that you need to be in the right place at the right time when they are planning these things or you are forgotten. do you ever plan these events?
- nyc or burbs? in nyc, i find it hard to do groups of more than a few, reservation tougher/schedules
- are they super cliquish together?
- Tween/Teen Boys and not fitting in...(more)
- sorry you are going through this. BTDT and still living it with DS going into 9th grade. My advice is to not ask about plans, not ask who he is sitting with and tell him that...(more)
- there is a huge maturity gap at this age anyway, and a ton of boys who are exactly like you describe your son. does your son enter into a new feeder school, with other...(more)
- Honestly, it can really go either way (but hopefully it will go well in MS for him). I found that my dc both branched out in MS and met a lot of the new to district kids and...(more)
- Not that this will be much comfort to him but this is so terribly common in MS. I am sorry! It is so hard to see your child in pain. Can he reach out to any other boys he likes...(more)
- Maybe a little CBT therapy or a social therapy group. I have a kid like this. One plus of our MS at least was there were tons of new people and clubs dc could really branch out...(more)
- This is painful and common. One of life’s lessons. But look at the big picture and remind him MS is temporary and no reflection on the person he is. He will make new friends the...(more)
- Tween/Teen Gutted by the Anthony Bourdain news
- Best job in the world, hit girlfriend, beautiful daughter...irreverent, passionate
- Wonder what we’re his demons?
- My ex just posted it was a sex game. What an ass.
- Best job in the world, hit girlfriend, beautiful daughter...irreverent, passionate
- Tween/Teen Xpost:recommendations for a books for 16 yo to take to camp? She's not a fan of sci-fi or dystopian books. I love giving her books I loved when I was her age, so would be happy...(more)
- The Good Earth, Gone with the Wind, Handmaid’s Tale
- Tween/Teen My teens have absolutely zero.plans this weekend. They insist that's normal. That teens dont care about memorial day weekend as a vacation.
- Of course. It’s fine, they still have school left.
- it is normal to me. it's a long weekend like any other. we have no plans either.
- my kids said "the adults are the ones who care about having fun on memorial day weekend" I think my kids have homework and studying. like 4 regents
- Parents make plans. Kid go along with plans.
- This. Why aren’t you at the beach house like everyone else?
- so sorry! no beach house no lake house! ;)
- So. Weekend trip to mystic. Day trip to Coney Island
- so sorry! no beach house no lake house! ;)
- This. Why aren’t you at the beach house like everyone else?
- What are your plans?
- a few barbecues. They dont really want to go they dont have friends there.
- Memorial day is a family long weekend. My usual social kids don’t have plans. It would be like having plans for Xmas. The plan is the family plan
- This. We are going out to SILs beach house. Sometimes we make a 3-day trip to dc. Or do cook out at ILs
- some of you are SO obsessed with you children's social status/lives
- Also “what I did this weekend that makes us look like we do stuff”
- so true...BUT I do have one who has zero social life and when you have a teen like that it can get concerning. It isnt avout social status. One of mine is clearly "nerd" status...(more)
- yes i get concern in this case but there have always been solitary people, and many of them are satisfied with that state
- Aren't they studying all weekend? Finals are right around corner
- Kids are exhausted imo and have spring fever. They need to relax and let off some steam
- What are they supposed to do
- It’s about honoring dead soldiers
- my 14 yo is working her first job today(day three), and it's at a very popular deli where everyone goes before going to the beach, and it's got to be a mad house.
- Tween/Teen To the clubbing poster...just find friends to go with. One con about my DH is that he isnt I to music or bands etc. Its disappointing but sometimes I just go with other people...(more)
- Tween/Teen Fun activity ideas for 3 girls for a party ?
- mani/pedi, pottery studio
- SORRY - something to do in the house
- movie, baking project
- SORRY - something to do in the house
- Bake cupcakes. Decorate t-shirts or bags with fabric markers
- there are so many things for little girls. I have boys. Those parties are HARD indoors :/
- My boys always baked cakes
- and do mani/pedis, decorate tshirts? yeah, okay
- but not sure their male friends would be into it
- My boys always baked cakes
- there are so many things for little girls. I have boys. Those parties are HARD indoors :/
- Karaoke
- how old
- mani/pedi, pottery studio
- Tween/Teen DD turning 10 having a SMALL (2 other kids) party at the house....(more)
- Dance party light
- we have one! I was thinking something in the clothes department (not $$) or hats or something?
- wow, i didn't even know there was a tween board
- np - lol - just noticed that!
- ditto
- one of those cheap blue tooth speakers? or a thumb drive with music loaded onto it.
- Dance party light
- Tween/Teen Where do nyc based teens go for STD testing? Their pediatrician doesn't seem right but insurance req visits to primary care .. cross posting w/nyc board
- There have to be free clinics.
- Urgent Care?
- They usually have a higher copay, no? You could try like a Minute Clinic type thing
- Planned Parenthood is excellent for this
- Planned parenthood maybe?
- that's what i thought but sadly -- there are so few of them around anymore.
- Well, better in NYC than elsewhere in this country.
- There has to be one in NYC. Also look for an STD clinic--usually near a college campus or area with a high gay population (because they arose during the AIDS era)
- NP: there are several PP clinics in NYC!
- There are several in NYC and more in the NY metro area
- there are -- next available appointment is a month away -- we'll figure it out. Thanks.
- Here--do it online...(more)
- Or look here:...(more)
- there are -- next available appointment is a month away -- we'll figure it out. Thanks.
- that's what i thought but sadly -- there are so few of them around anymore.
- If this was my dc, I would approach her ped first to see if she can do it or not. If dc does have a STD, I want her ped to know it
- Why? If it is easily cured?
- Because IMO it should be part of her medical record
- What is the basis of your opinion?
- Just that I trust our ped to make medical opinions for dc. I'm not sure what you are pushing back on.
- I don't know how comfortable most peds are treating STDs, for 1. And also I might not want it on the medical record.
- Oh I agree with your first statement - which is why I said that I would approach the ped with the question first. However I do think that just in case it has bearing on dc's...(more)
- You are more trusting than I am with that.
- Oh I agree with your first statement - which is why I said that I would approach the ped with the question first. However I do think that just in case it has bearing on dc's...(more)
- I don't know how comfortable most peds are treating STDs, for 1. And also I might not want it on the medical record.
- Just that I trust our ped to make medical opinions for dc. I'm not sure what you are pushing back on.
- What is the basis of your opinion?
- Because IMO it should be part of her medical record
- Why? If it is easily cured?
- gynecologist is considered primary care for insurance purposes if that helps you
- Unless it's a DS;)
- The place to go is family practice doctor, primary care and sees both genders. You can find an urgent care with a family practice doctor if need be and that is primary care.
- The surgeon is the mother!
- Unless it's a DS;)
- Tween/Teen There is a group of moms in my town who are very close and do birthday lunches. I am friends with two of the moms and regularly run with them but neither invites me when it's her...(more)
- Its their birthday thing so they keep it with juts them. I get it. I also get why you feel left out but its not personal.
- im being very serious and not snarky when i say: get a job. seriously, you need something for you that is separate of your kids, the other moms, town...
- ^and im engaged in my community, i have friends here, i have book club and get togethers, but i purposely seek a space outside of this
- Np what do you do for work? Is it full time?
- ^and im engaged in my community, i have friends here, i have book club and get togethers, but i purposely seek a space outside of this
- That’s understandable!
- the cliquey stuff doesn't end in HS. do you have other friends who are not part of this group? I cannot stand when adults post crap like that on FB. it just reinforces that...(more)
- np: with the caption "best girls!"
- Yes. So annoying!
- I do have other friends not in the group and try to just be happy that I have friends and accept those friendships for what they are.
- np: with the caption "best girls!"
- Do you invite them to your bday?
- Summer birthday so usually I'm out of town. One of them always gives me a little gift though
- It is so much easier to be an introvert. :)
- Do you take them out to lunch separately?