Tween/Teen

  1. Tween/Teen Parenting Advice...(more) 1-18-2017 4:56pm (13 replies)
    My daughter started 6th grade this school year and turned 12 in Oct. She has a so-called friend that she has been off and on friends with. The little girl has told her she can't be her friend twice now. My daughter also asked the little girl to be her gf, that is the latest reason the girl says she can't be her friend. My child doesn't even understand what it means to be gay. I don't know how to talk to her about this. I did my best when the situation first broke. The girl has threatened to tell the whole school that my daughter is gay and asked her to be her girlfriend. She also continues to message her on social media and passing notes in class. Today the little girl wants to be her friend again. Anyone have advice on what I can say to my daughter?? She is scared to tell the girl she doesn't want to be her friend.
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    • My 6yo calls hese switcheroo criends. She made it up. Switcheroo criends are best not taken seriously and forncertain can not be counted on to be kind. 1-18-2017 4:58pm
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    • Yes your daughter does now that asking to be this girl's girlfriend would be gay. She never should have done that 1-18-2017 4:59pm
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      • Huh? 1-18-2017 5:01pm
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      • np: right, this is weird. Even my clueless 10yo boy knows what gay means and the difference between a girlfriend and a friend. 1-18-2017 5:02pm
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      • Your dd should not go around asking other girls to be her girlfriend. Totally inappropriate 1-18-2017 5:02pm
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      • True...(more) 1-18-2017 5:03pm
        I made sure to explain to her that it probably made the girl feel uncomfortable. But that doesn't justify the girl threatening to tell the other kids at school. Also she may know that, but she doesn't know what it means to be gay. She just thought it would mean they were closer than just friends.
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        • Nice try. Stop excusing your dd's behavior or she will never stop behaving this way. And the other child is not obligated to keep secrets for her. 1-18-2017 5:05pm
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    • 12yo is not a little girl, it's an adolescent. And what do you mean your DD doesn't know what it means to be gay? Sounds like you are overprotective and sheltering. 1-18-2017 5:01pm
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      • - no subject -...(more) 1-18-2017 5:11pm
        She knows what sex is, she doesn't understand what gay sex is. She also didn't understand why she was having stronger feelings about this girl than her other friends.
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    • You're not doing your dd any good by assuming she doesn't know what gay means. She may not have meant that she is romantically interested in her friend but if she did, you are...(more) 1-18-2017 5:06pm
      making things worse by not talking to her about this. This friend is the least of her worries if she feels you wouldn't support her. As for the friend, there is no reason for your dd to declare they are not friends. She just needs to put some distance between herself and the friend. Start by telling the friend that you took her phone away and stop texting her for a while.
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      • - no subject -...(more) 1-18-2017 5:08pm
        My daughter didn't declare they weren't friends, the friend did and now she wants to be her friend again. The reason for my post was to ask for advice on how to talk to her about it. And about friends that want to be friends one week and not the other.
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        • you need to have a big talk with your daughter. she needs to know about these things. Her "friend" sounds like a jerk, though. She needs to put distance b/w them, while remaining...(more) 1-18-2017 8:12pm
          respectful.
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  2. Tween/Teen Waiting for financial aid letters from bc,Tulane and Bard, fingers crossed! 1-12-2017 3:12pm (2 replies)
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    • I would have been thrilled if ds applied to bard, he'd have fit right in 1-12-2017 3:14pm
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      • i like it too! 1-12-2017 3:45pm
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  3. Tween/Teen Seems so weird that it was so crazy for so long with all the college essays and testing in our house. Now it's so quiet and you just wait and hope for the best. 1-9-2017 8:25am (6 replies)
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    • what was the process. when did your dc write the essays? 1-9-2017 8:27am
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      • Started last summer wrote through December but she applied to a lot of schools and moves at a slow pace. 1-9-2017 9:17am
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    • Same here 1-9-2017 8:33am
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    • crossing fingers for you 1-9-2017 8:33am
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    • no early decision/action? 1-9-2017 8:34am
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      • yes she was defered 1-9-2017 9:17am
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  4. Tween/Teen So now almost my whole paycheck will go towards paying for college. DH will cover everything else. Thank god all the times I wanted to quit my job a stayed. 1-4-2017 10:04am (28 replies)
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    • Which college? 1-4-2017 10:04am
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    • Nice! 1-4-2017 10:05am
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    • I never view his/hers money this way. Family has a pot of X and from that everything gets paid, saved, etc. 1-4-2017 10:05am
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      • np Surely you realize though it's binary if one person loses their job, that cash flow is gone. It's a pretty smart way to think about budgeting. 1-4-2017 10:07am
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        • so if op loses her job the kid has to leave college? any budget is out the window if someone loses their job. 1-4-2017 10:09am
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          • Um, no - her kid has to borrow or postpone college til she finds a new job. Once you're unemployed with a big gap, it gets harder. It's a more realistic way to think about the...(more) 1-4-2017 10:11am
            risk.
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            • np: This. I took time off and my income has suffered a LOT. It sucks. And it does limit college options. 1-4-2017 10:13am
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            • what I'm saying is I dont like the 'my salary pays for childcare' mentality. There is family income, whether that has ups or downs. 1-4-2017 10:14am
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              • Yes but the two people make two different incomes, and it matters how much each one makes and contrubutes to the family pot. It allows for different family choices. 1-4-2017 10:17am
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                • Yes I plan to keep my job for as long as I can. 1-4-2017 10:19am
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              • Op and I agreed with you its just how it kinda works out it all goes in one pile but mine is what we would need for college 1-4-2017 10:17am
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                • I'm not debating that its great you work. It seems to have gone off track here. As is typical. 1-4-2017 10:18am
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                  • OP yea I guess that was more my point. I dont argue anything can happen and it could all go up in flames. 1-4-2017 10:22am
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              • Yea you don't have to like that statement at all 1-4-2017 10:23am
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          • No we will just have to move to a smaller place. 1-4-2017 10:16am
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          • She could apply for Financial aid then 1-4-2017 10:22am
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        • have you lost enough jobs that you plan for this? 1-4-2017 10:09am
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          • OP is talking about keeping her job instead of quitting. 1-4-2017 10:12am
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            • Yes I make 150K which will cover the next four years and allow me to contiune to put some in retirement 1-4-2017 10:28am
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          • I haven't, but my husband was unemployed for years and my dad died leaving my mom to raise us with no skills and no career (he was a young doctor at the time). So yeah, that...(more) 1-4-2017 10:12am
            experience has affected me.
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            • Totally get it. If one of us died we would have bigger problems than college. 1-4-2017 10:25am
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          • np: i've been downsized three times. 1-4-2017 10:15am
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            • Even with a downsize I could still make it. 1-4-2017 10:21am
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    • How much are you paying out of pocket for school? 1-4-2017 10:07am
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      • ^was it what you expected? 1-4-2017 10:08am
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        • yes I have been at the same company for 22 years. 1-4-2017 10:13am
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          • i will get a pretty big severance if they let me go in the next four years. I have never really asked for raises so I dont make too much and I work really hard on stuff noone...(more) 1-4-2017 10:15am
            wants to work on. Nothing is a guarantee but I feel pretty safe.
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        • It is what I expected 1-4-2017 10:19am
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  5. Tween/Teen Am I the only one on here that's been here since this site started? 1-2-2017 10:31pm (25 replies)
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    • Since youbemom? 1-2-2017 10:31pm
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      • Yes! It began after an urbanbaby overhaul 1-2-2017 10:32pm
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        • I was here, but I need to leave. Between the right wingers and that we're all about to be nuked mom, not good for my mental health. 1-2-2017 10:33pm
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    • Nope 1-2-2017 10:32pm
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    • I have. Off and on 1-2-2017 10:32pm
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      • Op. same haven't been on in years & nice to know it still exists for questions 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • I've been with you 1-2-2017 10:33pm
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    • No. here since urban baby started 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • I started in 2008. I think that's not too long after, right? Found it via Urban Baby. 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • I've been right here with you. 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • I resisted in the very beginning. I stayed on UB as long as I could bc I was convinced people would adjust. I was wrong. I came here abt 3 months in. 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • no, me too, and i hate what it has become 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • Me. I was on un 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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      • ^^i was on ub for a year before ybm was started 1-2-2017 10:36pm
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    • UB since my oldest was a baby in 2002. I was here on the first day. I've quit this place for months at a time, but I'm still around like the lame-o I am 1-2-2017 10:34pm
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    • Op. glad I'm not alone 1-2-2017 10:36pm
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    • Day one 1-2-2017 10:37pm
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    • We are legion 1-2-2017 10:40pm
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    • Started on UB in 2003 1-2-2017 10:43pm
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      • We are the Apple generation. 1-2-2017 10:43pm
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        • ooh..do you remember the "Apple" poster who posted it in response to everything? It was...(more) 1-2-2017 10:44pm
          b/c whatshername named her kid Apple
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          • I think I know her IRL which is why I will never forget her! 1-2-2017 10:45pm
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            • oh, I've asked on here so many times if anyone remembered the Apple poser - when monikers come up - and no one has ever remembered. Ah, thanks for remembering. Funny. 1-2-2017 10:47pm
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    • How long is that? 1-2-2017 10:45pm
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    • I've been here since the beginning! 1-3-2017 2:56pm
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  6. Tween/Teen 13 yo wants to go downtown to shop. I asked for an app on his phone to track him. Why'd? 1-2-2017 10:15pm (18 replies)
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    • Wwyd? 1-2-2017 10:15pm
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      • I would go with him 1-2-2017 10:16pm
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        • I've got to work & wants to go with a friend. Ok but I don't think tracking is so invasive 1-2-2017 10:18pm
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          • Who gives a shit if its invasive. He's 13. You're his mom. Signed OR below 1-2-2017 10:19pm
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            • Op: that's how I feel 1-2-2017 10:21pm
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    • I wouldn't track 1-2-2017 10:16pm
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      • Why? He thinks it's about trust & I say it's about safety 1-2-2017 10:19pm
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        • What will you know if you track? That's not safety as you can't help him 1-2-2017 10:20pm
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          • I won't be as dependent on having I'm text me or if 1-2-2017 10:22pm
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            • B/c I know his battery is low. I feel that in this day and age with technology I should know what's going on 1-2-2017 10:23pm
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              • You won't know what's going on. You will know where the phone is 1-2-2017 10:24pm
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    • I track mine 1-2-2017 10:16pm
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    • either track or go with him 1-2-2017 10:17pm
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    • My kids know that part of me paying for their phones is that I have a tracker on there. I grounded 16 yr old NYE bc I told her she had to leave her boyfriend's house by 12:30 and...(more) 1-2-2017 10:22pm
      I could tell by the tracker that they didn't even leave until almost 1am. Then she tried to plead traffic. I called her out on it and she totally admitted they hadnt' even tried to leave by 12:30 - she doesn't question the tracking - it's just part of her life until she pays for her own phone.
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      • Sounds fair to me 1-2-2017 10:24pm
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      • `i stopped tracking when ds went to college. And i still pay 1-2-2017 10:25pm
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        • Or: I haven't thought much about college but I assume she'll keep it on there. It's not a big thing for us - we all track each other. They'll come home from school and say "Mo...(more) 1-2-2017 10:26pm
          you left your phone in car all day! I kept checking to see if you ever went out to get it!"
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          • ^And I know I'll want to see her progress if she's driving home from school for weekends or holidays. 1-2-2017 10:28pm
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  7. Tween/Teen University of Michigan or Georgetown if you go into both EA. 1-2-2017 9:45pm (40 replies)
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    • Whichever is cheaper 1-2-2017 9:46pm
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      • I think they are both the same pricewise 1-2-2017 9:48pm
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        • np- i would think Mich would be less $ 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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          • nnp - Why? 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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            • it is public 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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              • $60K if out of state! 1-2-2017 9:51pm
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              • Michigan is $60 to 62K 1-2-2017 9:52pm
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                • holy shit. for a state uni? 1-2-2017 9:53pm
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                  • 28 if you are in state 1-2-2017 9:55pm
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                  • Yes. And this proves that people on ybm don't really know much about colleges. 1-2-2017 9:56pm
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          • if you live in MI 1-2-2017 9:50pm
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        • Then whichever the kid likes better 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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    • not sure what your question is, but Georgetown will be my dd's 1st choice when she applies next year. she will do ED because it is non binding. 1-2-2017 9:46pm
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      • I am asking which would you choose. 1-2-2017 9:46pm
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        • ok, my dd would choose Georgetown in a heartbeat, but she is focused on being in DC. 1-2-2017 9:47pm
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          • Mine also loves DC, but I worry about the whole Jesuit thing, we are not religious. 1-2-2017 9:52pm
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            • we toured it in Nov and did the info session and that came up in questions, but they said they are absolutely not specific about religion, no one is forced to be religious, etc...(more) 1-2-2017 9:56pm
              (we are atheists)
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              • np - Students need to take a few classes in religion. In addition sometimes it does come up, like re their healthcare policy a few years ago (they do cover birth control fwiw -...(more) 1-2-2017 10:01pm
                but that was just announced 3 or 4 years ago)
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                • yeah, they did say theology was in the core curriculum, but not religion classes per se. it's not like you are being prosletized. 1-2-2017 10:03pm
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                  • ^i think it is good for anyone, regardless of religious status, to study a bit of theology 1-2-2017 10:06pm
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      • such an overpriced school, don't understand why people choose this first over other superior academic schools 1-2-2017 9:47pm
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        • it is in DC, and that is a priority for some kids who want to go into foreign service, gov't etc in terms of internships during school. 1-2-2017 9:48pm
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        • Michigan is very $$$ out of state too 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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        • NP: SFS is the best school of its kind 1-2-2017 9:50pm
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      • how can a school be ED but non binding? 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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        • many are 1-2-2017 9:50pm
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        • Its not ED then its EA Early Action. 1-2-2017 9:51pm
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    • Michigan. Georgetown seems so douchey to me. 1-2-2017 9:48pm
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    • Georgetown. But what does dc want to study? 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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    • Depends. For MY dcs, the greek culture/party atmosphere of Michigan would not be good. I don't know what your kids are like 1-2-2017 9:49pm
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      • Like yours. I think she would love that 1-2-2017 9:50pm
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        • or: Too many rapes at Michigan for my taste 1-2-2017 9:53pm
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          • Sorry but Harvard and Stanford and Brown all had far more reported rapes than Michigan...(more) 1-2-2017 10:02pm
            and U. Much is much bigger. So you wouldn't want your daughter to go to Harvard because of that?
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            • Williams had 8.9 out of 1000 students report a rape. U. Mich had 0.3 out of 1000 reported rapes, for example. Very few cases are in the press unless they involve high profile...(more) 1-2-2017 10:09pm
              people so just because you read about a case doesn't mean a particular school has more rapes there.
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    • Depends on what you're interested in 1-2-2017 9:54pm
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      • She is interested in everything. She dosent know what her major will be yet 1-2-2017 9:55pm
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        • Why did she apply to Georgetown? 1-2-2017 9:56pm
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    • They are such totally different schools that if she has been accepted to both she undoubtedly likes one better than the other, or perhaps she got money at one. I would not be...(more) 1-2-2017 9:59pm
      concerned about the Jesuit thing but certainly she can ask about the percentage of Jews there. Once accepted she's in the driver's seat.
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      • Either--both fine schoolS 1-13-2017 8:15pm
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  8. Tween/Teen 3.75 quart staub for $145 is good right? that is a fairly big one? 12-26-2016 4:41pm (9 replies)
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    • I think that's a good price. Not sure , look around online like google the brand and size rather than asking here? Is it the size you want or are you just tempted because of a...(more) 12-26-2016 4:43pm
      sale?
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      • ^ I have the tea kettle and like it 12-26-2016 4:45pm
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    • That is quite small and you can find cheaper 12-26-2016 4:43pm
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      • 3.75qt is small? 12-26-2016 4:46pm
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        • For a Dutch oven, yes. I just got one for only 40 at home goods 12-26-2016 4:47pm
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          • I think I will return it because I might as well have s large one. 12-26-2016 4:48pm
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        • ^ok never mind you are correct 12-26-2016 4:49pm
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    • whats a staub? 12-26-2016 4:46pm
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      • like le cruseut but still made in france 12-26-2016 4:47pm
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  9. Tween/Teen I need help asap here...in late 40's, overweight, post-meno with 2 teens...have slipped into a very severe depression especially in last 6 months (but going on for years) I notice...(more) 12-16-2016 9:35pm (31 replies)
    the depression became much worse esp after menopause 3 yrs ago. I have severe mood swings, break dwn & cry when im alone at night...have many regrets & have severe insomnia too, Worse is that my house has become a total pigsty because i dont even have the energy to do the dishes or clean...I only do when i have absolutely no choice (laundry bc kids need clean clothes, etc. the extra 70 lbs i gained in last few years makes me feel even worse. its even a huge effort to shower/was hair(I know this is gross but need to be honest)
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    • You gotta get on meds. 12-16-2016 9:35pm
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      • Ive been on wellbutrin XL for 8 months 150mg but not helping anymore. 12-16-2016 9:40pm
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        • try a different one. my mom only went on meds during menopause due to the symptoms you describe above. she tried the old classics wellbutrin, prozac. did't need it after she...(more) 12-16-2016 9:43pm
          transitioned from menopause.
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        • there are so so many new drugs out there. you might need a new one or a cocktail. I'm on two but have a friend who's on 4 and is doing so well - now working to lower doses of...(more) 12-16-2016 9:45pm
          each. doesn't matter what it takes - just take the first step!
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          • I really liked wellbutrin at first bc it even helped with my ADD symptoms, but now it actually just makes me feel more agitated. 12-16-2016 9:48pm
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            • That can happen with some meds. They work until they don't or worse. Don't give up. 12-16-2016 9:50pm
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              • originally GP prescribed the wellbutrin bc he said it wouldaso help with add & weight issues...it did at first but not anymore...are there any other antidepressants that wont...(more) 12-16-2016 10:01pm
                contribute to weight gain? I only say this bc Im already 70 lbs overweight and cannot afford to gain more
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        • Change meds you should be seeing more improvement if you are takingmeds. Good luck 12-16-2016 9:48pm
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    • sorry, I am in a similar situation, although I'm older :) but not as depressed. It is so hard to break out, especially in the winter. Could you try weight watchers? maybe losing...(more) 12-16-2016 9:37pm
      weight and having a community will help? Or a life coach (don't laugh, it helped me) to structure my time and come up with a plan?
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      • yes, i prob should look into that...Ive been diagnosed with ADD & anxiety as well so all issues together make organization very difficult. 12-16-2016 9:39pm
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    • I am borderline you but not as severe yet. I know it's hard. 12-16-2016 9:39pm
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    • oh sweetheart. please go find yourself a good therapist and get some help. and meds. there's absolutely no reason to have to suffer. once your mood has stabilized you can start...(more) 12-16-2016 9:40pm
      helping yourself get healthier. good luck to you :)
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      • thank you for this...I know I need help asap 12-16-2016 9:41pm
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        • you do. I speak from experience. in this day and age especially - there's no reason to use all resources available. you won't be perfect but hopefully you will be better and can...(more) 12-16-2016 9:42pm
          enjoy your life.
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          • ^^^ sorry - no reason NOT to use all resources 12-16-2016 9:43pm
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            • I agree...think Ive just shut down so much that its an effort to even make calls to find help, but im at a very dangerous point in my life right now.. 12-16-2016 9:47pm
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      • You are the only nice one here 12-16-2016 9:42pm
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        • probably because I hear you loud and clear. I struggle daily. 2016 sucked the biggest balls ever and I didn't use my resources properly and paid the price. It will take some work...(more) 12-16-2016 9:48pm
          to find what is best for you but YOU NEED TO DO THIS. It will only get harder and harder to motivate yourself to get help.
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          • I'm not OP :) Just know genuine concerned comments are rare here. 12-16-2016 9:49pm
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          • OP here: I agree that i need to seek help ASAP.. 12-16-2016 9:54pm
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    • You are posting on tween but we're all over on toddler. Who is in your support system? You need to treat this like the illness it is. The shower/hair washing thing is classic...(more) 12-16-2016 9:42pm
      depression, no need to be embarassed - its even on clinical checklists.
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      • I didnt even know that it was a symptom..I am embarrassed bc btw that & weight gain I look awful...NEVER used to be this way...always showered daily in the past 12-16-2016 9:45pm
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        • It is seriously a diagnostic criteria, because it shows how exhausted you are. You've got to go back and get your meds adjusted to find something that works. This is all brain...(more) 12-16-2016 9:47pm
          chemistry thrown out of whack by menopause, you need to convince yourself that you are ENTITLED to help fixing this. Trying to willpower your own way through it is like trying to willpower walking on a broken leg - it just doesn't make sense.
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          • I could not agree more. You're in a rabbit hole right now. But you've got some fight in you - use it. Tomorrow is a new day. Honestly my heart breaks for you. Please take care of...(more) 12-16-2016 9:49pm
            yourself. XOXOXO
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          • ITA...I know come monday, I have to get an appt somewhere...again im in a dangerous hopeless feeling place right now 12-16-2016 9:53pm
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            • If you are feeling that terribly right at this moment then you should consider going to a hospital. I know it sounds extreme but god forbid you swing too far over the weekend. 12-16-2016 9:55pm
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              • Ive thought about it at times like this...feelbad for my kids and dont want to alarm/traumatize them but they already know something is wrong ...its obvious 12-16-2016 10:03pm
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                • I hear you. I worry about ds bc he is so in tune to my moods. But better to have a sick mom than no mom. 12-16-2016 10:05pm
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                  • Its true...I already feel so guilty...this has obviously impacted them greatly as well 12-16-2016 10:10pm
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    • Check hormon levels. I ended up needing progesterone and testosterone and not antidepressants 12-16-2016 9:47pm
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      • I was always afraid of HRT because of all the cancer risk,ec. but i feel so awful that this is worth looking into. 12-16-2016 9:50pm
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  10. Tween/Teen DC deferred from Brown. Are the chances of acceptance after a deferrel pretty low? 12-14-2016 9:39pm (16 replies)
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    • yes 12-14-2016 9:40pm
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      • Okay good to know. Time to move on. 12-14-2016 9:41pm
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        • Lol, hope you don't listen to YBM like that 12-14-2016 9:42pm
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          • I pretty much do. You guys have a lot of experience. 12-14-2016 9:43pm
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          • OR:I am a college counselor. 12-14-2016 9:44pm
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            • Of course you play one 12-14-2016 9:44pm
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    • The school can answer that question for you 12-14-2016 9:40pm
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    • It can still happen, wasn't rejected. 12-14-2016 9:41pm
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    • You need to campaign, say that you would definitely go, argue why it's perfect, send any grades, achievements since earned. 12-14-2016 9:42pm
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    • At a top college like Brown, yes, the chances are low unless you are connected and can start pulling those connections. Of course - there is also the possibility that dc will be...(more) 12-14-2016 9:44pm
      accepted but I would continue with the mindset of rejection in the next round
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      • There isn't a next round 12-14-2016 9:47pm
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    • IIRC, for most schools, deferrals have no better shot than regular applicants....(more) 12-14-2016 9:46pm
      Stanford is the one I remember being an exception. They will reject up front rather than defer. So their deferrals have slightly better odds than the rest of applicants.
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    • Kid must make extra effort -- write a letter .. meet with someone on campus 12-17-2016 9:12am
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      • i know it is better than flat out rejection but agree your daughter needs to demonstrate continued interest. There are plenty of great schools in addition to brown. I would...(more) 12-23-2016 11:48pm
        definitely keep my game on for rd. GL
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        • NP. I agree, but DD should also go full tilt toward her next favorites and not waste all her energy on Brown. 12-24-2016 2:15am
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  11. Tween/Teen Three of my dd's ea decisions tomorrow! 12-14-2016 12:25pm (10 replies)
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    • GL 12-14-2016 12:26pm
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    • lol tween teen hahhahahah 12-14-2016 12:26pm
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      • lol back, she is a tween prodigy 12-14-2016 12:42pm
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        • how did it go? 12-14-2016 7:08pm
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          • thanks, decisions probably out tomorrow atfer 3 pm 12-14-2016 8:02pm
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            • Good Luck! 12-14-2016 9:28pm
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              • EA acceptance to Boston College--she is thrilled! 12-15-2016 7:54pm
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                • Amazing!!! 12-16-2016 11:58am
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    • Good luck! 12-15-2016 7:58pm
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      • ^^Oh - this is old - congratulations! 12-15-2016 7:58pm
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  12. Tween/Teen Almost everyone of DDs friends has gotten in ED. She does not hear till tomorrow, and I dont think she will get in. The school is a reach for her. I just wish they announced all...(more) 12-13-2016 9:55am (8 replies)
    ED at once, its to nerve wracking. I think it will be much better after she knows tomorrow night, either way. They waiting feels more grueling for her then the rejection
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    • It's a long, intense process and kids need to choose their crazy/choose their hard. 12-13-2016 9:56am
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      • OP so agree. Just want it to be over and for her to get excited for whereever she gets in. I know she will. Its just too long. 12-13-2016 10:01am
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      • Choose their hard? 12-13-2016 10:01am
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        • What they choose to deal with. The stress of early decision (all their eggs in one basket) vs pacing it. 12-13-2016 10:02am
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          • Oh I see and agree. I think she thought this situation would be okay a couple months back but now that she is going through it I think she would do things differently. 12-13-2016 10:04am
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    • what is ED? 12-13-2016 9:58am
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      • early decision (college admissions). 12-13-2016 9:59am
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        • oh, right. whatever. 12-13-2016 10:11am
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  13. Tween/Teen Question about gift for 12-year-old...(more) 12-12-2016 9:57am (3 replies)
    Hey Moms! Kasha here, I'm seeking some advice regarding a Christmas gift for my 12-year-old daughter. I like to get her things that will inspire her morally/politically, or get her motivated to think about important issues. She's very bright; for example, last year I got her a book by Michael Moore about current events and she read and understood all of it. This year I would like to her her something that inspires her to learn more about what happened with the DAPL out at Standing Rock in ND. She's really into wolves right now, so I was thinking about getting her a dreamcatcher with a picture of a wolf on it (so that she-hopefully-is inspired to learn about Native American culture, symbols, and folklore.) I'm looking at the dreamcatchers on www.wolfdreamcatchersworld.com I don't really want to get the super expensive one...any opinions on which of the cheap ones looks the most well-made and authentic? And what do you guys think about this idea of using gifts t
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    • lol. nice attempt at spam. 12-12-2016 9:58am
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    • Lolololololol! 12-12-2016 10:00am
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    • we've missed you spamela! 12-12-2016 10:03am
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  14. Tween/Teen Kids that have heard ED already, Weslyan, Cornell, Amherst, UPenn. Anywhere else? 12-10-2016 9:29pm (0 replies)
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  15. Tween/Teen Ea decisions next week. It seems like an eternity since 11.1. Others out there waiting too? 12-10-2016 9:20pm (4 replies)
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    • This is my by year. I will be helping dd w this in a year. 12-10-2016 9:21pm
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      • ea is nice option so far one acceptance really fast from Tulane . My child will do rd too and then look at options, including finanvial aid packzges 12-10-2016 9:26pm
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        • Mine is looking at Tulane 12-10-2016 9:33pm
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          • looks like a good school. we will visit in the spring. 12-10-2016 10:04pm
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  16. Tween/Teen So nerve wracking a lot of kids are be notified about Early Decision, yesterday was Cornell, its a lot of stress. I think today is U Penn. A group of DDs friends were over...(more) 12-9-2016 2:45pm (10 replies)
    yesterday all so nervous.
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    • My daughter finds out about Penn in fifteen minutes.... 12-9-2016 2:46pm
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      • Oh gosh good luck!!! I thought it was 5:00? My DD has to wait till next week. 12-9-2016 2:48pm
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        • 3. I'm here distracting myself, while I watch a soap opera and check Facebook. 12-9-2016 2:54pm
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    • Yale is next week, my nephew is sweating that one. Dd (junior) tested me about a ton of early decisions starting to happen 12-9-2016 2:48pm
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      • So weird it makes it all so real all of a sudden. 12-9-2016 2:49pm
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      • who else has announced decisions? 12-9-2016 2:49pm
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        • Non elite schools. She texted me earlier saying a ton of kids she knew heard from northeastern today 12-9-2016 2:50pm
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          • This post has been deleted. 12-9-2016 10:07pm
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            • My cgild got Cornell ED yesterday, very proud of all her hard work and niw tuition. . . 12-9-2016 10:32pm
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  17. Tween/Teen Want to buy a used Ps4 on CL for my son and someone has one at a decent price with some games...I am hesitant to buy from CL as some of the ads seem like scams, but this guy...(more) 12-2-2016 12:55am (4 replies)
    picked up his cell phone when I called and said I can meet at local Gamestop and he can hook up there for me to prove it works, etc. Do you think he is legit then or can this be a scam (ie counterfeit item) anyway. I would beuy retail but cannot afford right now.
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    • My 10yo just bought a PSP on cl. He was texting the guy . We went to pick up the item, and it was another 10yo. They exchanged cash and the item and it was adorable. In a smelly...(more) 12-2-2016 1:00am
      tween sort of way. Don't be so paranoid.
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      • I may seem paranoid but I was already scammed twice on CL in the last 6 years...I dont have the money to risk losing right now 12-2-2016 1:02am
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    • There's always a risk, but I bought a ton of baby stuff on Craigslist and never had an issue. 12-2-2016 1:02am
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      • Yes, I also used to buy Baby items on CL but when it comes to electronics, the scams are rampant, esp on CL 12-2-2016 1:09am
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  18. Tween/Teen Is it possible if your kid has great ECs, a varsity sport, president of the student body etc. to get into a really good school like Brown or Yale, if they have a 3.8 from a TT...(more) 12-1-2016 8:22am (61 replies)
    school and a 33 ACT score. Counselors told her not to apply ED and waste the chip unless you have a 4.0. DC did anyway and now I am concerned it was a mistake and she wasted an ED opportunity, on a school that was too much of a reach. Anyone with experience. This is not me bragging there are plenty of kids at her high school with far better GPAS.
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    • you need 4.0+ 12-1-2016 8:22am
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      • you absolutely do not need a 4.0 if you are coming from a TT school like Brearley or Colegiate 12-1-2016 8:52am
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    • I'm honestly not trying to be mean, but no one here can give you a worthwhile answer. She's just going to have to wait another few weeks.' 12-1-2016 8:23am
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      • I gave a worthwhile answer below. It's not a yes or no answer, but it's worthwhile. And its very normal in this last two weeks to speculate and want to talk about it as OP does. 12-1-2016 8:26am
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        • With all due respect, your worthwhile answer is that you don't know. 12-1-2016 8:29am
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          • with all due respect, OP isn't asking for answers, she is asking for a discussion and experience. 12-1-2016 8:32am
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            • Have a nice day. 12-1-2016 8:33am
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            • OP here. Yes that is more of what I am asking for. Not concrete answers just experience. 12-1-2016 8:34am
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              • OR, I know. and since i"m in it too I'm happy to discuss....nothing else to do but spin wheels, right? 12-1-2016 8:35am
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      • Not mean at all. Just wanted to know if anyone had experience? 12-1-2016 8:27am
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        • the 3 kids at my school who are applying, one has 4.0 and 36, and she is captain of everything and every class is an AP, she has a great shot by anyone's estimation. the kid...(more) 12-1-2016 8:28am
          whose grandfather is a billionaire and is on the board also has a great shot despite not gret record. the other kid, definitely crapshoot but ED is the time to do the crapshoot IMO.
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          • Thats what DC thought. She wanted to give it her best shot, so if she dosent get in she can say she gave it all she had. 12-1-2016 8:30am
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            • she did the right thing, counselor notwithstanding. she will get into great schools and she will be glad she gave it a try 12-1-2016 8:33am
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              • Thank you, thats what she thought. Hopefully it will not hurt her chances other places. 12-1-2016 8:39am
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          • Wow no way DD can beat those stats. 12-1-2016 8:31am
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            • but she is not at our school, so she doesn't have to. 12-1-2016 8:32am
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              • A friend of my DDs had similar stats when applying to Brown last year, she did not get in ED, but it helped her get in RD. Hope that helps. 12-1-2016 8:35am
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                • just wondering, what kind of school? public or private? 12-1-2016 8:36am
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                  • Private TT girls school 12-1-2016 8:39am
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    • it is hard to tell...you really never know and it depends...does her school weight GPAs? 12-1-2016 8:23am
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      • They wait them but not a lot. Very little difference in her weighted GPA and she has taken 5 APs. 12-1-2016 8:28am
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        • sorry weight them 12-1-2016 8:32am
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    • It's possible, it's a gamble, and the "consolation" will be tons of other good schools that will want the student. Including target or safety schools that will offer tons of aid. 12-1-2016 8:24am
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      • my dd is similar in stats and she will apply ED next year toCornell. it might be a reach but you never know. 12-1-2016 8:25am
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        • It's a super reach for ever kid because it's a numbers game. Being qualified isn't enough. 12-1-2016 8:29am
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      • this is the truth. I have a senior now, also waiting for her ED. She knows of 3 kids in her school who did ED to brown. one will get on merit. one whose grandfather is on the...(more) 12-1-2016 8:25am
        board, he will not get in on merit but will get in. one who is more of a crapshoot.
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        • it is rare that Brown will take 3 kids from the same school 12-1-2016 8:26am
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          • yes, we know. and if it makes you feel better, I will concede taht you know more than I do. feel better now? 12-1-2016 8:26am
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            • well, how do you know that these three will get in? 12-1-2016 8:27am
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              • I didn't say that they would. I said one was a crapshoot. The one whose grandfather is on the board has never not gotten something he wants, for better or worse. The girl w the...(more) 12-1-2016 8:30am
                4.0 and 36 and 5 AP classes this year...well...of course no one knows. but we are at a competitive provate school and the relationship there also matters.
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                • Any diversity to factor in? 12-1-2016 9:09am
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          • She may know her school better. Mine does multiple to several ivies each year. 12-1-2016 8:27am
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            • yes, so does my dc's school but 3 from the same class to brown is very very rare. 12-1-2016 8:28am
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              • and I NEVER EVER said that they woudl take all three. 12-1-2016 8:30am
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                • ^^also, OP didn't say brown. she said, "like brown or yale." so we don't knoe. also we don't know where her daughter goes to school 12-1-2016 8:31am
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        • Nothing is weighted in the student's favor these days EXCEPT merit aid at safeties for those who can pay. Which is counterintuitive and unfair. 12-1-2016 8:26am
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    • there is a fine line here because counselors do not want rejection stats from top tier schools on the HS record 12-1-2016 8:27am
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      • ^^so they try to discourage unless they feel like it is a strong strong chance the kid will get in 12-1-2016 8:27am
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    • OP, did she apply to other rolling or EA schools? 12-1-2016 8:27am
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      • yes she did. 12-1-2016 8:29am
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        • we are waiting for the ED and for 4 EA's on 12/15. its very stressful 12-1-2016 8:31am
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          • I know it is so stressful and in real life you have to keep it to yourself. 12-1-2016 8:33am
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            • agree.....I have told a few too many people what the ED choice is, none with seniors, but if it dosn't happen...anyway, I assume people don't really remember this stuff, they only...(more) 12-1-2016 8:34am
              know my dd is a great girl who will go to college
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              • Exactly. I told people in my office when they have asked, but they dont care enough to remember. Good luck to you 12-1-2016 8:38am
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                • thanks. you too. 12-1-2016 8:38am
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          • I would imagine she has a ton of target schools in her list as well - - a student like this will end up with choices. 12-1-2016 8:37am
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            • Thanks she is a nice kid too. I know that dosent count for much, and who dosent think their kid is nice? 12-1-2016 8:41am
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              • I didn't ask before, but how does naviance score her on this? Mine is like 99% for Cornell but no way will she actually have that chance. 12-1-2016 8:46am
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                • She is within the average for GPA and ACT. The problem is you cant tell who got in as an athlete or added diversity. 12-1-2016 8:48am
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                • My school also shows that for Cornell. So your DD could have a great chance 12-1-2016 8:51am
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                  • She's a junior, so right now it's just projecting 12-1-2016 8:54am
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                    • ^but her extracurriculars are weak - she just won't be "special" enough 12-1-2016 8:57am
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                      • She still has time. She could be student body pres 12-1-2016 9:01am
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          • What schools are EA. I know University of Michigan 12-1-2016 9:07am
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      • She wanted to apply to Georgetown EA but they wouldnt let her apply at the same time as somewhere ED. 12-1-2016 8:46am
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    • Where did she apply ED? 12-1-2016 8:27am
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    • My nephew with strong EC, perfect scores and grades did not get ED or RD at his fc (an ivy). He went to Georgetown and had many other excellent acceptances. He transferred...(more) 12-1-2016 8:56am
      to his fc school sophomore year. He's at a tt business/law grad program now.
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      • Wow you just never know. Georgetown is amazing though. I think DD would be happy there 12-1-2016 9:00am
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        • Thete are plenty of fabulous schools. Our kids need to apply widely and know they probably won't get their first choice but will rhrive whete fhey land. U 12-1-2016 4:27pm
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          • Op--I get your stress. I am a mom to a senior with 5 ea/s out there. Got accepted at one school with rolling admissions 5 days after application. She decided not to do ED to keep...(more) 12-1-2016 4:54pm
            more options. I am trying not to stress because it is SO hard for the kids already. Both our kids will end up a great schools. 1450 new sat and 700s in SAT 2--good gpa. Your child's credentials are great!!
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            • Thanks. Your DC also has amazing credentials. Good luck! 12-1-2016 7:16pm
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  19. Tween/Teen Ohio State...(more) 12-1-2016 5:36am (11 replies)
    The Ohio St killer was a Somalian refugee who came to this country for Safe haven. I'm sure that we provided him with housing, food and college tuition assistance with our fondest hope that he would peacefully assimilate to our society. Instead he goes on a rampage running people over and stabbing kids the w a butcher knife bc Ohio Stste did not provide separate prayer rooms. Libs are feeling bad saying we should provide prayer rooms to Muslims at every University at tax payers' expense. The big issue here is that it will not stop there. They have demanded Switzerland change their flag bc they find the cross offensive and have made other outrageous demands in Europe (look it up). The next step will be that they feel uncomfortable w women not being cocered. In caving into these demands, we are not only giving credence to violent acts but we are alienating our own citizens who have been taught that there is a separation of church and state. No other religion is making these dem
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    • Here at YBM there have only been two terrorists ever in the history of time: Timothy McVeigh and Dylan Roof, otherwise they are blind to any other terrorism 12-1-2016 6:15am
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      • Eat a bullet. 12-1-2016 6:18am
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        • This post has been disliked 3 times. showThis. Fuck you and fuck your orange Hitler 12-1-2016 6:21am
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          • guys, I voted for Obama 2X Hillary (very happily), you are all insane. I have just been on ub/ybm for a long time and this is the sentiment here 12-1-2016 6:26am
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            • Fuck your Muslim hate 12-1-2016 6:27am
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              • you need to refill your meds prescription 12-1-2016 6:28am
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      • - no subject -...(more) 12-1-2016 7:35am
        You're living in a bubble. How can you make this statement. You're a disgrace. I guess the 9/11 attacks, France attacks, Spain train attack, recent mall attacks, Syrian attacks never happened. You're an idiot. You
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    • - no subject -...(more) 12-1-2016 7:04am
      This was a factual statement that had no desrimitory undertones. All you can respond with is curses and hateful remarks maybe you should take you meds
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      • - no subject -...(more) 12-1-2016 7:07am
        Seems like a group of uneducated people cursing and being ignorant to others ideas and opinions ... deplorables
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    • - no subject -...(more) 12-1-2016 7:15am
  20. Tween/Teen My Senior is going to take the Subject tests one more time on December. Its her last chance, it just seems like a waste of time. 11-29-2016 3:24pm (13 replies)
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    • how badly did she do? 11-29-2016 3:26pm
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      • 600 and 650 11-29-2016 3:29pm
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        • how bad is that? I know nothing about the subject tests. 11-29-2016 3:40pm
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          • For the schools she is looking at they want 700s. Every other part of her resume is where it should be. 11-29-2016 3:41pm
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            • ah. well, good luck to her! 11-29-2016 3:41pm
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              • may be ok if very high gpa, resume, edsay and teacher recommendations. 11-29-2016 4:46pm
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    • I don't get it. In the same subjects? Why not take them in other subjects? 11-29-2016 4:54pm
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      • how wereb her sats? 11-29-2016 10:32pm
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        • No SAT just a 34 ACT 11-30-2016 8:02am
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          • great score 11-30-2016 8:39pm
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    • You do know that many schools including Yale, Columbia, Brown, Penn and Duke do not require SAT subject tests for students who took the ACT (as opposed to SAT). 11-30-2016 8:48pm
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      • ^also vast majority of top schools let students choose the SAT subject tests so perhaps she has a strength in another subject where she hasn't taken the test. My DD changed to a...(more) 11-30-2016 8:49pm
        diff. test and did much better.
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        • My daughter is aldo a senior. For us the trick is applying to many target schools and a few reaches. I feel she will hsve great choices! 12-1-2016 2:38pm
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  21. Tween/Teen College apps...(more) 11-27-2016 6:31pm (7 replies)
    Are people's DCs working a way on them to get them done by Christmas, or do you find yourself nagging them in the final moments?
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    • I am a teacher. Several of my students have submitted already but a good amount are still tweaking things and tracking down references. A few (good students) haven't even started...(more) 11-27-2016 6:32pm
      their essays!
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      • That's actually comforting to hear. DD is far along but in the final moments seems to be stuck. 11-27-2016 6:34pm
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    • We are hoping the remaining ones will be 11-27-2016 6:33pm
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    • My dc is done, but older child was hitting submit at 11:59 p.m. on deadline date. 11-27-2016 6:34pm
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      • that was me -- i remember fed-exing my apps 11-27-2016 6:36pm
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        • I had to fax them the day they were due because the mail was too slow 11-27-2016 6:42pm
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      • The school gives them a deadline of Dec. 15th 11-27-2016 6:36pm
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  22. Tween/Teen SAT 2 Subject tests...(more) 11-26-2016 11:19am (24 replies)
    If you have taken the ACT and did wel,l but you scored an unimpressive 600s on the subject test, and the school says they dont require the subject test do you have to send them?
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    • No. Most schools don't require. 11-26-2016 11:20am
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    • What was ACT score? 11-26-2016 11:23am
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      • Doesn't matter, when considering whether to send sat2's. The schools ever want them or they do tt. If they want, send even if "optional." If not, don't. 11-26-2016 11:24am
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      • 33 11-26-2016 11:25am
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        • That's a very good score. Congratulations. 11-26-2016 11:26am
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          • - no subject -...(more) 11-26-2016 11:28am
            Thanks but the subject tests have been a challenge and I am not sure why. She just cant do well on them. I know you need 700s
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            • Butt so many schools don't want them at all 11-26-2016 11:28am
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            • Does she go to a good high school? Or did she go to one with a bunch of AP classes? 11-26-2016 11:29am
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              • She goes to to a TT highschool in NYC. Yes she took APs 11-26-2016 11:35am
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          • That's what my dd scored yet she wants to retake :/ 11-26-2016 11:28am
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            • np - Why? That's ridiculous. My dd also got a 33 and did not retake it 11-26-2016 11:29am
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              • Scored a 800 on MATH2 so she was slightly disappointed with ACT score. 11-26-2016 11:31am
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                • My dd scored a 780 on the Math 2 and 730 on the chem subject test and decided that it wasn't worth the pressure to retake the ACT with a great score like 33 11-26-2016 11:33am
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                  • I agree with you too. Think because she's a junior she wants to give it another shot. 11-26-2016 11:36am
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                    • My dd took the ACT September of junior year as well. 11-26-2016 11:50am
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                  • Those are great scores. 11-26-2016 11:44am
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                    • Oh, most definitely. Dd was very happy with those scores. 11-26-2016 11:51am
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    • So the only test score dc will submit is one ACT score? 11-26-2016 11:28am
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      • That's not unusual. 11-26-2016 11:29am
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      • If she has to she will submit the Subject tests but they will def take her out of the running at a lot of school 11-26-2016 11:37am
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        • Maybe, maybe not. 11-26-2016 11:51am
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          • Thanks she has a lot going for herself otherwise. I know they all do, except for these subject tests. 11-26-2016 12:00pm
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  23. Tween/Teen Thoughts on this week's modern family? I think SPOILER...(more) 11-18-2016 11:12am (1 reply)
    them making a goat die was kinda off their typical storyline
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    • I think that show is on it's last season. It's not that good anymore. 11-18-2016 11:30am
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  24. Tween/Teen Salk Middle School application and Written Essay...(more) 11-1-2016 3:56pm (0 replies)
    My son really liked Salk during the tour and it seems like it could be a good match . Does anyone know some examples of the past written essay questions?
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  25. Tween/Teen New LuLaRoe Consultant...(more) 10-29-2016 10:10pm (7 replies)
    Hello,

    My wife Jennifer has started her own LuLaRoe company. For those of you who have not heard of LuLaRoe clothing might have heard of their buttery leggings.

    Jennifer is launching tomorrow, 10/30/16 online on Facebook.

    If you would like to be apart of this event all you need to do is click this link to join her Facebook group.

    https://www.facebook.com/LuLaRoeJenniferAllessio

    If you have any questions feel free to post them here on her Facebook group wall. Can't wait to see you there!
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    • Don't delete again!!!! 10-29-2016 10:11pm
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    • Fat Mormon clothes 10-29-2016 10:12pm
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    • Please delete this spam and virus infected link. 10-29-2016 10:12pm
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      • My anti-virus wouldn't let me go there too 10-29-2016 10:12pm
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      • - no subject -...(more) 10-29-2016 10:13pm
        This is a real link I posted for my wife
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        • Kapirsky said don't open it for me 10-29-2016 10:13pm
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        • So you are spamming us on purpose? 10-29-2016 10:14pm
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