Special Needs

  1. Special Needs Anyone have any success with vision therapy for treating strabismus and avoiding surgery? It’s going to cost a small fortune but I desperately want to avoid surgery if I can....(more) 4-16-2021 1:28pm (1 reply)
    ....thanks
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    • My ds had strabismus and we did the surgery. It helped but didn't 100% resolve it. What did resolve it was the right rpescription for glasses from a great pediatric ophtho. She...(more) 11 hr 4 min ago
      also talked me out of spending thousands upon thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours on the completely unproven methodology of vision therapy. The vision therapist that I saw promised the moon, and none of it has any legitimate backing.
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  2. Special Needs Protective and Stylish Security Doors In Sydney | SP Shutters...(more) 4-16-2021 2:40am (0 replies)
    The SP Shutters provide various range of security doors from sound, stainless steel mesh design to robust, perforated aluminium, the composition of their doors offers enhanced strength and immunity. Their heavy-duty, aluminium, one-way vision design is an option that reinforces privacy and as well as protection. To get detailed information please do visit our website at https://spshutters.com.au/
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  3. Special Needs Frantic summer camp scramble, any thoughts (NYC)...(more) 4-16-2021 12:01am (7 replies)
    We just found out today that our kid's SN nonpublic school is not automatically granting us a summer "camp" program because our kid is beyond the normal age cutoff for the school or some other nonsense (school goes to 5th grade, kid is moving to a different school for 6th). We will have to file for pendancy just to keep her in summer camp at this school for the summer. Has anyone done this? If so, what lawyer did you use and how much did they charge?
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    • And on a separate note, we are on the cusp of getting OPWDD Self Direction approved....(more) 4-16-2021 12:03am
      But the budget didn't include camp for some reason (broker forgot to include it). I don't know if we will get summer camp covered by self-direction in time to pay for another camp if we don't get pendancy at the school's summer program. Anyone know of any other last-minute summer camp options in NYC for SN kids (mild ASD, ADHD, anxiety)? Preferably for less than $5k?
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      • What about Yomi? 4-16-2021 12:09am
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    • Is it normal to attend the summer after 5th ends and they're transferring schools? 4-16-2021 12:04am
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      • I wasn't sure. I think it depends on the age of the kid and the age that the school normally serves...(more) 4-16-2021 12:17am
        To complicate things, my kid is now on a 12-month IEP but her middle school only offers 10 month programs and I don't want to mess up her placement at the next school by insisting she needs summer support.
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        • Agree with poster, check out Yomi. 4-16-2021 1:15am
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          • Yomi is $7100, there is a 7 week commitment, and no refunds if they have to go virtual....(more) 4-16-2021 8:46am
            We can barely afford a $1500 lawyer for pendancy.
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            • Where does it say 7 week commitment, my kids usually go for four weeks. It is a bit pricey but unfortunately that's all the camps around here. 4-16-2021 6:49pm
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  4. Special Needs Looking at 3 schools for mild ASD/ADHD sixth grader. Need to remediate academic delays connected to attnetion issues, and building social skills due to ASD-like...(more) 4-15-2021 1:48pm (3 replies)
    issues like perseveration on personal interests and overall immaturity. In burbs. Here are the options: (1) Well-rounded small SN school that offers academics every day plus lots of electives for social opportunities. 45 minutes away. (2) Small SN school with intensive ELA/math and explicit social skills remediation. Concerned other kids might be more delayed. 20 minutes away. (3) Mid-size straight-LD school with no social supports, but will keep pushing ds who is capable of grade level content. 25 minutes away. Which way would you lean?
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    • Honestly, I'd apply to each and see where it goes. For my ds with similar profile it was where he felt he "fit" and it became clear to everybody. 4-15-2021 1:51pm
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      • He's in the first 2 and probably will get in the last. Will do 1-day visits. It will probably come down to a gut feel, but I was just wondering if anyone has BTDT with a similar...(more) 4-15-2021 2:29pm
        decision.
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    • Number two or public school with a solid IEP. 4-15-2021 6:24pm
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  5. Special Needs Parents of high functioning ASD kids. I've been informed that my 3rd graders are subject to NYS exams. Would you opt out? Why? It's been such a sh*t show with pandemic learning....(more) 4-14-2021 10:28am (4 replies)
    DS has been on Zoom for over a year.
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    • they're gonna need to take them sooner or later 4-14-2021 10:29am
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    • Do they need additional service in ELA? Do you know if they get AIS? If you think they will do poorly they are then qualified for additional intervention. 4-14-2021 10:30am
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    • I opted mine in. I'd like a better sense of how he's doing, and am happy to have him practice taking a standardized test that doesn't affect him. If he does as poorly as...(more) 4-14-2021 10:06pm
      anticipated in ELA I'll have something to help advocate for supports. If not, so much the btter.
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    • Mom to high school ASD kiddo who came through NYC publics all the way—just take them. It’s NBD unless you make it so. 4-15-2021 6:23pm
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  6. Special Needs Any of you ever feel like throttling your dc. WHY can't you just do this or understand this or handle this. it's so frustrating. 4-13-2021 3:13pm (3 replies)
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    • sometimes, yeah. Not often though, I like them a lot. Now ask me about DH. 4-13-2021 3:14pm
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    • One of my DCs causes so many problems we are on the verge of divorce due to it 4-13-2021 3:16pm
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    • of course. 4-13-2021 9:33pm
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  7. Special Needs DS 13 has been on adhd meds since he was 6. combined type and pretty severe. He is recently protesting taking his meds. He is upset about his appetite and his size (he is small...(more) 4-13-2021 10:32am (15 replies)
    and skinny for his age). I dont knwo what to do. he is not functional off meds. they make him barely tolerable as is. Dont get me wrong I love him but he is unbelievable difficult his whole life and especially now during puberty and this awful school year. He is so mad at me. Says I am starving him and poisoning him. I am feeling worn down. Anyone have experienne with this?
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    • Ugh, I'm sorry. MY ds is younger and sounds like he has a more mild case but I do worry that he is not gaining enough weight. Can you talk to his doc? Any other ways to get him...(more) 4-13-2021 10:34am
      more calories without stoping meds?
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      • we've been taking about it a long time. He's also just a smaller kid. Dh is 5'9" and I am 5'3". He refuses to eat breakfast beyond a few bites and then barely eats lun...(more) 4-13-2021 10:36am
        everything in the house from 3:30-10. I think he is getting his calories. its just his perception. school nurse told him that his meds kill his appetite which I guess I never told him explicitly
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    • yep. i let my 14yo back off and he willingly takes them on school days. that said, he is just now functional off meds and at 13yo he would not have been. also i would try to...(more) 4-13-2021 10:35am
      remind him that his size is not likely due to his medication (although i know he wont actually listen to you), my 14yo is nearly 6 feet tall. he's lean but he is tall and eats like a horse. another thing is get him involved in the conversation with his doctor. perhaps there is a better medication for him?
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      • this is good to hear. I think maturity is a big piece. he has been unwilling thus far to join the conversation with docs. he really needs to be a part of it at this age. he...(more) 4-13-2021 10:40am
        eats a ton after school and at night.
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    • talk to doc, figure out how to up calories. involve him in the coversation. 4-13-2021 10:36am
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      • this is the key. I have been managing him since he was 3. he is so nuts and hyper all the time leading up to meds and as soon they wear off. He needs to join the conversation...(more) 4-13-2021 10:39am
        but I cant seem to get him to. I am afraid I am going to blink and he will be 18 and then what?
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        • He needs to get into competitive swimming or something. 4-13-2021 10:39am
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          • I couldnt agree more. he was playing tennis well 3x a week before covid and he was good. this year really threw him off track on everything... and add in middle school attitude 4-13-2021 10:41am
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          • track 4-13-2021 10:46am
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    • Yes, it is tough. We give ds a choice to take or not on weekends. We make sure to feed him avocado and things like that, and a second dinner. Height is likely not related to...(more) 4-13-2021 10:37am
      that
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      • agree. his stature is not due to the meds. my dh is 5"9" and 150lbs 4-13-2021 10:42am
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    • Take him off that poison. 4-13-2021 10:38am
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    • google raising lions and maybe consider a short consult and course with the guy...(more) 4-14-2021 1:20pm
      you may be able to get his behavior to a level where he can be functional off them.
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    • Yes. It's pretty common for teens to want to go off their meds. Let him go off on weekends if you can. 4-15-2021 2:21am
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  8. Special Needs Has anyone heard anything about Bergen Tech HS in Paramus? My son has an IEP and is not the most academic and someone recommended this school. 4-13-2021 10:16am (3 replies)
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    • I have heard it’s a very good program - good luck! 4-13-2021 10:18am
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      • Thanks. I can’t find anywhere their acceptance rate. I know the Teterboro one igives them a test and is harder to get into 4-13-2021 10:22am
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    • Typically the NJ Tech schools are the county magnet schools and are very competitive. 4-15-2021 9:16am
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  9. Special Needs Got iep draft today- not a single mention of the crippling dyslexia my child is operating with. 4-13-2021 7:41am (51 replies)
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    • So, add that in. 4-13-2021 7:41am
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      • So? 4-13-2021 7:42am
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      • Oh I plan to raise hell about the fact that the school didn’t. 4-13-2021 7:45am
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        • I wouldn't raise hell. I'd just ask that it be included. Are the educational issues addressed even though it doesn't specifically use the term dyslexia? 4-13-2021 7:46am
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          • ^IEPs are written by classroom teachers, and it's perfectly possible that the person writing it didn't get a copy of the report. 4-13-2021 7:48am
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            • Op- we literally had a meeting about the report. 4-13-2021 7:49am
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            • IEPs are most certainly not written by classroom teachers 4-13-2021 7:49am
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              • Who do you think writes them? 4-13-2021 7:49am
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                • ^I mean, it has to be a special ed teacher. but teachers write them. 4-13-2021 7:50am
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                  • A classroom teacher is not the same as a SPED teacher. Related service providers also contribute to writing them and an initial is prepared by school pysch 4-13-2021 7:51am
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                    • yeah, I work in a special ed program where everyone is a special ed teacher. I wasn't thinking about gen ed programs. no need to school me ;) 4-13-2021 7:52am
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                • Special Ed teacher--I was a SPED teacher in NYC for years and classroom teachers barely looked at them (which is another issue in an of itself) 4-13-2021 7:50am
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                  • I meant that. I wasn't thinking about kids with IEPs who are in gen ed programs. 4-13-2021 7:51am
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                    • are they classified with Learning Disabilities? 4-13-2021 7:52am
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                      • the students with the IEPs? 4-13-2021 7:53am
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                        • I meant what is OPs kid's classification? 4-13-2021 7:54am
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                  • sadly true 4-13-2021 7:58am
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                • our heads of special ed writes them. teachers periodically update them. 4-13-2021 7:50am
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          • Not really no. 4-13-2021 7:48am
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            • Ok, so attach a copy of your report, and state that you want the diagnosis included, and that you also don't feel like the reading deficits are adequately addressed. 4-13-2021 7:49am
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    • I was mystified by the IEP sent for ds once. Then I realized they sent another kid's IEP! 4-13-2021 7:42am
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      • The DOE is such a shit show. 4-13-2021 7:45am
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        • Hey disliker, I have been waiting for 8 months for a hearing officer to take up my dc’s case regarding SN school. Public school failed dc massively. Shit show is an apt...(more) 8 hr 44 min ago
          description.
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    • Do you have a. Euro psych evaluation and diagnosis I to attach? You can send it to them so they can add the diagnosis. At least it is still a draft. What a headache! 4-13-2021 7:45am
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      • Yup. We spent so much $$$$ this year to get the diagnosis on paper and in the hands of the school. 4-13-2021 7:46am
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    • Who diagnosed the dyslexia? Does it mention learning disabilities in reading? 4-13-2021 7:46am
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      • A neuropsych. It skates over reading abilities- it reads as if “oh he has trouble reading” when the reality is that’s the whole basis of his issues. 4-13-2021 7:48am
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        • Are the goals reading? Do they mention a multi-sensory approach to reading? 4-13-2021 8:17am
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    • why would that be mentioned in an IEP? 4-13-2021 7:48am
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      • you mean it's not part of their classification? 4-13-2021 7:48am
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        • NY has specific classifications and it should be classified as learning disabled. 4-13-2021 8:15am
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      • Why wouldn’t it be mentioned in the binding document about teaching a kid with a learning disability? It’s literallly why he has the iep 4-13-2021 7:52am
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      • lol, what? Do you know what is an IEP? 4-13-2021 7:53am
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        • In our district we will only classify learning disability in reading--any outside eval will be included in the document repository and goals will be formulated using...(more) 4-13-2021 7:58am
          strategies/programs that address the dyslexia-- the word is never mentioned in a school based document.
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          • This is exactly correct. LD is the classification. 4-13-2021 8:16am
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    • This post has been deleted. 4-13-2021 7:49am
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      • The school didn’t dx Ds a neuropsych did. 4-13-2021 7:50am
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        • my Ds'a low muscle tone is included. that dx came from a neurologist, they added it to his IEP and attached the report. 4-13-2021 7:51am
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      • NP: My dc’s dyslexia and the recs associated to support his learning are an integral part of hisnIEP 4-13-2021 7:52am
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    • what does it say? 4-13-2021 7:50am
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    • I find IEPs do not include a diagnosis. Did they give your schedule the LD classification. Both my kids have ieps for specific learning disorders 4-13-2021 7:52am
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      • They classified autism. Which fine he is on the spectrum but that’s not what impacts his education. He is impacted and needs services relating to the dyslexia. It’s like they are...(more) 4-13-2021 7:59am
        ignoring that piece of the puzzle to make it easy and not make any accommodations for his reading/writing. Intellectually and emotionally and socially he is on grade level or above but because of his reading they keep putting him in smaller more delayed spaces.
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        • ask for OG or have them pay for outside OG tutoring 4-13-2021 8:04am
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        • Autism is a classification. Dyslexia is not. Look up classifications in NY and you will see what is included. 4-13-2021 8:18am
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          • LD is a classification. They possibly chose Autism because it is a stronger classification and is pervasive. OP is concerned because she feels its the LD that is affecting her...(more) 4-13-2021 9:38am
            schooling, not the autism. I would call the CSE chair to discuss.
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            • Autism is also a classification 4-13-2021 9:55am
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              • I know, I did not think it was Op's kid that has autism. I was explaining that LD is a classification and so is autism. 4-13-2021 9:56am
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              • you said dyslexia is not a classification. The classification for dyslexia is "Learning Disability". Many kids meet the criteria for 2 classifcations. They usually choose the...(more) 4-13-2021 10:12am
                more impactful one.
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        • His IEP has to say LD, not dyslexia (which is an LD). In the goals it could be about reading. 4-15-2021 2:24am
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  10. Special Needs Any parents of ASD kids get frustrated by Autism Awareness Month stuff? Care of remote school I overheard the book being read to my 2nd grader's class -- my awesome autism or...(more) 4-12-2021 11:34pm (6 replies)
    something. And I was just so frustrated. She lives with her older brother -- his rages, his rigidity, his tears, his mean and insensitive dismissal of her. It's not awesome. She asked later if her brother had a different kind of autism that made him so mean. I hate this stuff so much. Thanks for listening to my rant.
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    • That's funny that she asked the teacher that. From the mouths of babes. 4-12-2021 11:36pm
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      • no, she asked me since i was in the room. she would not have spoken about him to her class. 4-12-2021 11:54pm
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    • Ohhh! Not easy 4-12-2021 11:52pm
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    • I'm sorry. Teachers should be more aware esp, that there is so much variety 4-12-2021 11:53pm
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      • There's a boy with AD in the class -- entirely possible his parents are promoting this. Sigh. I don't want to crap on their parade but this is not awesome at all. 4-12-2021 11:55pm
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        • I'm sorry, it's awful and thoughtless 4-12-2021 11:58pm
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  11. Special Needs MMFS treatment of sexual harassment of female students...(more) 4-12-2021 7:39pm (5 replies)
    An Instagram page mmfs_stories posted multiple sexual harassment complaints from former and currrent female students being ignored by the school administration https://www.instagram.com/mmfs_stories/
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    • This post has been deleted. 4-12-2021 7:42pm
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    • This post has been deleted. 4-12-2021 7:45pm
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    • So far the official response has been that the matter will be discussed within the school, nothing mentioned about internal reforms...(more) 4-12-2021 7:51pm
      Does anyone have any more clarity about whether this is being taken seriously? It’s pretty damning when a small private school is not a safe space for girls.
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      • This is horrible. I can’t believe I regretted not being able to afford MMFS over summit . 4-12-2021 8:36pm
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    • Oh my gosh this is awful! 4-12-2021 7:53pm
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  12. Special Needs Does a local non-profit youth community program that gets funding from the county's real estate tax levy have to comply w/ Americans w/Disabilities Act? 4-12-2021 6:10pm (24 replies)
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    • - no subject -...(more) 4-12-2021 6:12pm
    • I would think so. 4-12-2021 6:12pm
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    • Enough. Your kid can't swim there. 4-12-2021 6:12pm
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      • No reason why he can’t. 4-12-2021 6:13pm
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      • What's this about 4-12-2021 6:15pm
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    • Why are you asking this again - it is not the right place fro your child find a better fit. Unless you want to tell us the details of what kind of class it is you need to move on 4-12-2021 6:13pm
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      • it's like my kids -- don't like the first answer so they ask repeatedly. 4-12-2021 6:14pm
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      • This is BS. People shouldn’t just have to look elsewhere when businesses are skirting the law. 4-12-2021 6:14pm
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        • your prior post provided no indication that any law was violated. 4-12-2021 6:15pm
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          • Child is being denied based on his disability. 4-12-2021 6:16pm
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            • Explain how. A child could be denied participation AND have a disability without there being a link. And a child can be denied for legitimate safety or behavior reasons. 4-12-2021 6:16pm
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              • It was based on the disability. 4-12-2021 6:18pm
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                • What is your proof of that? Did they tell you? Did they explain? 4-12-2021 6:19pm
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                • call a lawyer there are certain firms that all they do is sue businesses over ADA 4-12-2021 6:19pm
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                  • This post has been deleted. 4-12-2021 6:38pm
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            • ADHD is not something that they can discriminate with - if they had a physical disability that would be different 4-12-2021 6:17pm
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              • REad the ADA LAW...It is clear taht you can not discriminate on any disability be it vision, hearing, phsyscial or any mental or neurological etc etc. 4-12-2021 6:25pm
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    • The ADA does not cover a program not accepting a child when they did not even know he had ADHD. 4-12-2021 6:13pm
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      • The law requires they must inquire what the disability is. They didn't bother because they didnt want any child w/ disability. 4-12-2021 6:41pm
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    • Is this for swimming? which place is it? 4-12-2021 6:14pm
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    • Lots of non-profits get partial govt funding. ADA applies, but you need a very clear case of a violation -- wht happened? 4-12-2021 6:14pm
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      • ^also all orgs must follow ADA, private, non-profit or any other. 4-12-2021 6:18pm
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        • privates dont have to like religious organizations 4-12-2021 6:26pm
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    • np: let it go. You, OP, are way overboard on this. And if you can't find a lawyer who wants your case, it could be because you don't have one. Not everything in the world is or...(more) 4-12-2021 8:16pm
      should be actionable.
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  13. Special Needs Moms who conceived naturally after 43? Any complications? 4-12-2021 5:46pm (1 reply)
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    • There was a mom who posted that she conceived at 46! 4-12-2021 5:46pm
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  14. Special Needs Cousin's 20mo was dx'd with a "global delay" - not walking or talking yet. Is this dx just a placeholder for now? Any experience with this? 4-12-2021 5:35pm (15 replies)
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    • Yes, just a placeholder 4-12-2021 5:36pm
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      • op-is this usually autism? The baby seems cuddly and smiles a lot but I only saw him briefly so I don't know how much turn-taking he does. My cousin had an emergency C-section and...(more) 4-12-2021 5:38pm
        her mom wonders if the baby might have been without oxygen.
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        • not necessarily autism, could have a genetic disorder or other disability 4-12-2021 5:39pm
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          • Thank you. I do some early childhood work but this is out of my element and my aunt is asking me. 4-12-2021 5:40pm
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          • ^ I would not worry about the autism label, sometimes given to get more services and not necessarily clear at that age 4-12-2021 5:42pm
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        • The important thing is, your cousin is on top of this. Now that there is this dx they will have supports and someone is watching all the milestones. This will mean a...(more) 4-12-2021 5:41pm
          more certain diagnosis when that can be done and interventions as early as possible.
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          • Thank you. She is playing the waiting game saying "they don't see anything yet" but he was given the "gobal delay" dx. 4-12-2021 5:47pm
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        • It is not usually autism. It's just a big unclear 4-12-2021 6:19pm
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    • My dd had a global delay. She was in special Ed hntil4ty grade. She is a straight a student with no services in 8th. 4-12-2021 5:42pm
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      • Until 4th grade. 4-12-2021 5:43pm
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      • What were her signs? Talking? 4-12-2021 5:47pm
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        • She was 3. She couldn't really follow directions. She could draw a line, jump, cut. She just had a ton of delays. 4-12-2021 6:28pm
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          • She spoke early but did not develop. She ended up needing glasses which helped. My son has autism and was diagnosed with autism at 2. 4-12-2021 6:29pm
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    • My ds had that dx and he did outgrow it. We thought for a while he would end up with an ASD dx 4-12-2021 5:47pm
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    • My global delay kiddo didn’t get a definitive diagnosis until he was 8 years old. It was an uncommon presentation of mild cerebral palsy. Focus on remediation of symptoms for now, 4-15-2021 6:27pm
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  15. Special Needs Anyone have a neuropsych eval done before dc goes to college? Advice? In nyc 4-12-2021 1:33pm (0 replies)
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  16. Special Needs Had anyone seen or thought about seeing the off Broadway show Blindness? 4-12-2021 12:53pm (0 replies)
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  17. Special Needs Is 6000-7500 about right for a first neuropsychological evaluation for behavioral/possible ADHD? 4-12-2021 11:26am (6 replies)
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    • does it include educational testing 4-12-2021 11:28am
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      • Op. I’m not sure I’m totally new to this so didn’t know to ask! It’s parent consult,...(more) 4-12-2021 11:31am
        2 in person testing sessions with ds then a feedback session
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    • yes for full neuropsych i recently paid $6500 4-12-2021 11:36am
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      • Op. Thanks. Similar # of appts as I posted above? 4-12-2021 11:39am
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        • yes except we did it all online 4-12-2021 11:44am
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    • depends. you dont need a full neuropsych for an adhd dx. for a full battery neuropsych eval with all cognitive, educational and projective tests, yes that's right. 4-13-2021 10:22am
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  18. Special Needs I wish I'd never had kids. It is just so hard. My older son turns 18 soon and his ADHD, anxiety and general rigidity make him unpleasant to be around and the prospects of him...(more) 4-11-2021 3:57pm (31 replies)
    living independently are dim. My younger son, who is almost 16, is so jealous and resentful of his brother that he criticizes him (and me) nonstop. My ex is MIA and on the spectrum, too. It just a very lonely life. I never stop worrying and honestly, my kids are not nice to me at all. I had spent so much time and money on therapy and done everything I can to help. Will it ever get better?
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    • Sorry 4-11-2021 3:57pm
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    • I’m sorry. No advice. But I feel you. My dc won’t be independent either 4-11-2021 3:58pm
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    • sending you love and a hug. that's a lot, especially to manage on your own. 4-11-2021 3:58pm
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      • I will add, that as my 2 ASD/ADHD teen mature things are looking up for them. I want to send you you kindness too. 💜 4-11-2021 4:03pm
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        • Maturity is HUGELY important and often seems like it’s one of those things that will just pass your kid by. NP 4-11-2021 4:04pm
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    • I hope somehow your older guy can live independently some day 4-11-2021 3:58pm
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    • It gets better as they age 4-11-2021 3:59pm
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    • I am sorry. And yes it will get better 4-11-2021 3:59pm
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    • I am so sorry. 4-11-2021 3:59pm
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    • I am so sorry! You're doing the best you can! 4-11-2021 3:59pm
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    • I knew when she was 17 that my add, anxiety-riddled and unpleasant dd needed to get away. She got into a college she was happy to go to, and everything got SO MUCH BETTER. Just...(more) 4-11-2021 3:59pm
      like the shrink she saw for 3 years promised it would.
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      • ^she wanted to to be independent and her self esteem was helped immeasurably by accomplishing stuff on her own, even working out doing poorly in a class, and switching to another...(more) 4-11-2021 4:01pm
        class. That would have been unimaginable a year before, for her to do what’s necessary to switch a class in college.
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        • what was her senior year like of high school? 4-11-2021 4:03pm
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          • It was better than the previous 3 years in terms of grades, but hard in terms of squabbling/bad/attitude....(more) 4-11-2021 4:06pm
            I know she was trying to be more agreeable at home because my mother died the day before her senior year began, so in hindsight, she could have been a lot worse!
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    • My nephew has ADHD and is very rigid and we were all very worried about him. He is now 20 and is working 30 hours a week and is doing really well. I hope things improve for you 4-11-2021 4:00pm
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      • where does he work (what kind of job) and did he go to college? 4-11-2021 4:02pm
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        • He tried college for one semester and it did not work out. He works in a warehouse lifting and moving things. He is thinking about returning to college part time next year while...(more) 4-11-2021 4:03pm
          keeping his job
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          • I wonder if there are still jobs at places like UPS which provide benefits and support and retirement places for people who dont go the college route. 4-11-2021 4:06pm
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            • Np this is kind of random, but does cvs offer benefits at all? I only ask bc our local cvs has a few clearly sn adults on staff. 4-11-2021 4:08pm
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              • np Wegmans also does 4-11-2021 4:09pm
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      • my bff's son is similar and he works in a vape shop which -- honestly - isn't what anyone would have hoped for 18 years ago, but now is a blessing. 4-11-2021 4:04pm
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    • I'm so sorry. It sounds very difficult. 4-11-2021 4:02pm
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    • I'm sorry. There's a real need for supportive housing for young adults like this. Does he get disability at 18? 4-11-2021 4:03pm
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      • he won't qualify. there is no intellectual disability and we live in a red state that is extremely stingy even with kids much worse off than him. 4-11-2021 4:04pm
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        • That sounds so hard. I'm sorry 4-11-2021 4:04pm
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    • I'm so sorry. Your life is hard. I hope you have good friends and some family that recognize how much you do and treat you well. 4-11-2021 4:06pm
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    • This post has been deleted. 4-11-2021 4:06pm
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      • glad your dh is doing well. my ex is not doing well and never has. He is a big part of the problem as he is extremely negative and punitive toward both kids. 4-11-2021 4:10pm
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        • This post has been deleted. 4-11-2021 4:16pm
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    • omg, that's a lot for one person to handle, I'm so sorry 4-11-2021 4:08pm
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    • wow, I could have written this. almost exactly. it sucks. I constantly am wondering if I should just get covid. (I'm overweight) 4-13-2021 10:43pm
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  19. Special Needs Has anyone had success getting multiple day accommodation from ACT? 4-11-2021 2:50pm (3 replies)
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    • There was that guy who could do it and get you a back door admission too. 4-11-2021 2:52pm
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      • this is the SN board... 4-11-2021 2:52pm
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    • Dc is a sophomore but he will need it so I hope it will be possible. 4-11-2021 3:03pm
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  20. Special Needs Ds did it. he freaked a little but got through the shot without pitching a huge fit (just protestations, some shaking, tensing and making sure the nurse talked him through each...(more) 4-10-2021 6:29pm (0 replies)
    step). One down one to go!
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  21. Special Needs I really wish I could do everything with sn ds over. He's 15, many hospitalizations, residential . I really wonder how much of this could have been prevented . I think I went...(more) 4-10-2021 3:48pm (9 replies)
    down the sn rabbit hole and made things worse than they could have been.
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    • This post has been deleted. 4-10-2021 3:49pm
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    • Help others. 4-10-2021 3:50pm
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    • who knows, right? 4-10-2021 3:53pm
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    • the teen years can be really hard, but maturity helps 4-10-2021 3:54pm
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    • You did the best you could based on what you knew or were advised at the time. 4-10-2021 3:55pm
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    • I’m sorry you feel this way. I sometimes have regrets about my dd but then I think that I would second guess anything I did. I think maybe dd was going to struggle the way she is...(more) 4-10-2021 3:55pm
      stRuggling regardless of my actions. Or maybe this is how I make myself feel better since there is no way to turn back time
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    • hindsight is 20/20. You never know how choosing other solutions would have gone. You do the best the can. 4-10-2021 3:59pm
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    • He is still young. I doubt you made it worse. You care so he is far far ahead of the game. GL 4-10-2021 6:04pm
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    • I know what you are saying. as kids get older and we think about all the years in the rearview mirror, it makes you worry that if you had done things different a kid would have a...(more) 4-10-2021 6:09pm
      better life now or his life would be easier in the future
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  22. Special Needs This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:42pm (32 replies)
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    • You can sue 4-9-2021 9:43pm
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    • No, because they may not have the staff to deal with that child safely 4-9-2021 9:43pm
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      • And the location may not be accessible, or modifiable to accommodate a disability. 4-9-2021 9:46pm
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        • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:48pm
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    • no, if they can't guarantee the child's safety 4-9-2021 9:43pm
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      • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:45pm
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        • how do they even know though? Doesn't seem relevant 4-9-2021 9:46pm
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          • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:48pm
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            • What did they ask? My kid has ADHD and I’ve never had to put that on any sports application 4-9-2021 9:51pm
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              • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 10:18pm
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            • How do you know they booted him because of that? 4-9-2021 9:51pm
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        • what is the program? is there a risk to having a kid with an attention issue in the water with the class? could be fair. 4-9-2021 9:47pm
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        • If the ADHD affects his ability to pay attentions and be compliant then that could be an issue. My ds has autism and I could never have him in a regular program. He...(more) 4-9-2021 9:48pm
          For swimming. Needs someone who has experience working with kids like him.
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          • Maybe the program feels he requires 1:1 staff to ensure his safety, which they may not be able to provide. 4-9-2021 9:50pm
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            • Right. If it’s six kids in a group, the instructor would not have the time to continually redirect one child. 4-9-2021 9:54pm
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        • They can deny a child with behaviors they cannot manage. They aren't a public school that is required to find the resources. 4-10-2021 9:26am
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    • I think that depends on local law but seriously, if the nonprofit can’t help a disabled kid what can you do? Give them more money? Suing ruins it for everyone else 4-9-2021 9:45pm
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    • the requirement is for "reasonable accommodations" - depends on the program and the disability. 4-9-2021 9:46pm
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      • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:47pm
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        • you may not be the best person to assess safety etc. although with ADHD the behavioral issues could be a challenge for safety etc 4-9-2021 9:49pm
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        • Why do they even have to know he has ADHD officially. Did they say they rejected him because of ADHD? That’s weird 4-9-2021 9:50pm
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          • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:56pm
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            • How do you know it was from ADHD? I have never waved that flag outside the classroom 4-9-2021 10:03pm
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            • If they did not know he had ADHD, then it's not why he got kicked out. He could have been kicked out because of his observable behavior. Outside of schools the reasonable...(more) 4-10-2021 9:31am
              accommodation does not include anything costly other than physical access (e.g. handicap accessible entrance).
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        • if you felt you needed to tell them about it, it is severe enough that he would need one-on-one training. you are literally putting your kid at risk 4-9-2021 9:51pm
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          • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 10:21pm
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            • then why is he in swim lessons if he was on a swim team before? 4-10-2021 1:04pm
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    • no, private non profits that dont have the staff or accommodations to deal with the challenge dont have to hire them 4-9-2021 9:47pm
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    • is there no other program? 4-9-2021 9:49pm
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      • This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:50pm
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    • most of these swim programs are staffed by kids with a 12-15 hour training certificate (with one or two supervisors). They are not in any way trained to deal with a disability in...(more) 4-9-2021 9:51pm
      the water in a group setting.
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    • I don't think so. Their program and staff is not set up to deal with children with disabilities. When I sent my dc for swimming lessons, I chose programs where dc was welcome...(more) 4-10-2021 1:02pm
      (either specifically for children with disabilities or where the staff/prgram was experienced in dealing with kids with disabilities.As a parent of a child with special needs, I have fought many "battles" for dc over the years. However, my advice to you is not to create a battle over something like swim lessons. The pandemic will pass. More opportunities will open up. Take a deep breathe and let it go. It isn't worth a big fight and certainly not a lawsuit.
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  23. Special Needs This post has been deleted. 4-9-2021 9:18pm (0 replies)
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  24. Special Needs Ds is getting his first COVID vaccine tomorrow. He is deathly afraid of needles. I mean he pitches a big fit at the doctors every time. Tomorrow, a huge room full of people...(more) 4-9-2021 9:09pm (12 replies)
    getting the vaccine. I am REALLY hoping that keeps him from flipping out.
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    • at the javits center the guy stood behind me and i didn't even feel it. sounds porno 4-9-2021 9:09pm
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      • Yep - same. He moved in on me like maybe he would hug me and then, BAM, stabbed the back of my arm 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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        • was he a beefy national guardsman? i'm swooning now lol 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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        • that is so strange 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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    • Have you talked with him about it? 4-9-2021 9:09pm
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      • not yet. I need him to sleep tonight, so not bringing it up till tomorrow 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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        • So he doesn't know yet? 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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          • he knows we sch4eduled it, I told him. But he hasn't mentioned it at all this week. So either he blocked it out (he has ADHD and Anxiety) or he really forgot 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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            • Good luck. You will both get through it. 4-9-2021 9:11pm
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    • He will rise to the ocassion 4-9-2021 9:09pm
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      • This. I think he will be okay, OP! 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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    • Lidocaine and close your eyes 4-9-2021 9:10pm
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  25. Special Needs How many times I can postpone a CSE-IEP meeting?...(more) 4-9-2021 9:05pm (2 replies)
    Last February I had to postpone my child’s CSE/IEP meeting for personal reasons. My child attends a SN funded school. I requested for rescheduling the meeting one week in advance of the original date. It worked. Meeting was rescheduled for next Monday April 12th in the morning. But I need to cancel it because I need more time to confirm something important for the meeting. I was wondering if it is possible?. I mean, I don’t want them to go ahead with the meeting without me. Do I have the right to postpone it again, at the last minute? It would be a last minute postponement because the meeting is in the morning and they will read my email asking to reschedule it the same day a couple of hours before the scheduled meeting. I need your advice please. I don’t know what to do. I am afraid they will go go ahead with the meeting without me. I would really appreciate your thoughts and suggestions.
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    • Doe cancels all the time, sometimes at the last minute. I wouldn’t worry about it 4-9-2021 9:09pm
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    • There's no number of times limit. But you cannot expect anyone at DOE to be checking their email before Monday morning, and I would also call at 8am Monday if no one emails you...(more) 4-10-2021 9:50am
      back. But it may be a long wait for another meeting time
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