Would you be upset if you lent MIL and SIL your summer home, you have a no shoe in home rule (in apt too) they know this but hate the rule so they wore shoes all week in your home and... (more)
then argued with you about it after the fact. Saying they were rubber shoes, they swept the floors, etc. I said to DH not the point, we have a no shoe rule, we (I) always have, these are my home(s) they should respect this rule or not visit/borrow our home(s). Don't you agree. My dh thinks I am out of line and when I loan out my home it is theirs to do as they see fit including wearing shoes.
posted July 15th, 2009 at 8:29pm in Toddler
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- Can't they just clean the floors for you now? 7-15-2009 8:30pm
- It is not a matter of clean floors, I have clean them or have them cleaned, I do not want shoes in my homes and really do not feel like arguing the point with them whether they clean...(more) 7-15-2009 8:32pm them or not, they will say they cleaned them even when they didn't. The real point is these are my home(s) and if we have a rule that says no shoes then they should leave their shoes at the door. It is not as though the rule is no TV. This is a reasonable and common rule in many homes. This is the way I am and grew up, to me it is gross to have shoes in the house.
- why don't you like shoes in the home? are you ocd? 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- No we just never wear shoes in the house, ever, it is kind of gross and dirty, your shoes are outside all day and then you are going to walk around your house with that, yuck! 7-15-2009 8:37pm
- You sound controlling. 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- why don't you like shoes in the home? are you ocd? 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- It is not a matter of clean floors, I have clean them or have them cleaned, I do not want shoes in my homes and really do not feel like arguing the point with them whether they clean...(more) 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- I totally agree with you 7-15-2009 8:30pm
- ^^^disrespestful 7-15-2009 8:30pm
- I'd be upset. Your house your rules. They are not showing respect. 7-15-2009 8:30pm
- ita - just don't let them stay there again. 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- FWIW I did not say a word until they came in with their shoes and I said, do not mind removing your shoes, remember we do not wear shoes and they specifically said we wore shoes all...(more) 7-15-2009 8:34pm week and you obviously did not know or care. I said I did but what can I do and left it. Afterwards I said to dh if they cannot be respectful I do not want to loan them our home again. They save a lot of money by staying in our summer home opposed to a hotel or b&b in my opinion if they want to continue to use it they should respect this (really one and only) rule. I did everything else for them and was very hospitable.
- I'm on your side with this one. What does DH think? 7-15-2009 8:37pm
- ^never mind. 7-15-2009 8:37pm
- He thinks I am being petty....even when we have house parties people take off their shoes and we go to other homes and there are no shoes rules too, IMO this is very common, just...(more) 7-15-2009 8:39pm because they do not do it/never heard of it does not mean it is not done. In some countries it is downright disrespectful to wear shoes in someones home.
- This is common. Even if it weren't, your ILs should have respected your wishes. 7-15-2009 8:40pm
- I'm on your side with this one. What does DH think? 7-15-2009 8:37pm
- FWIW I did not say a word until they came in with their shoes and I said, do not mind removing your shoes, remember we do not wear shoes and they specifically said we wore shoes all...(more) 7-15-2009 8:34pm
- ita - just don't let them stay there again. 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- I see both sides, but the more angry you get, the more you'll look bad 7-15-2009 8:30pm
- shut the fuck up 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- Your rule is annoying but if it is your house it must be respected 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- unclench, girl! 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- yes, I would be upset. 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- I agree with you. you are not asking so much. They are being disrespectful. 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- Boy were your ears ringing all week? 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- DH and ILS wrong 7-15-2009 8:31pm
- Just like with renting out your home, expect to hire a cleaner after people leave. Then it's no big deal. You are mad because you feel like they don't respect you in general. 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- But they are not renters they are my inlaws borrowing my home for the week, I do not rent it out just for this reason, I would never rent my home! 7-15-2009 8:35pm
- Well, they clearly don't respect or like you. So make things worse for your Dh already and just don't lend it again. It's obviously not going to work out. 7-15-2009 8:36pm
- But they are not renters they are my inlaws borrowing my home for the week, I do not rent it out just for this reason, I would never rent my home! 7-15-2009 8:35pm
- Just curious, how do you know they wore their shoes? did you ask them? 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- ittta with you, but not much you can do now, except not let them stay there again. how do you know they wore shoes in the house? 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- You should have known that they would not follow this. 7-15-2009 8:32pm
- this is true, your ILs don't respect you 7-15-2009 8:39pm
- That's awful. Similar to smoking in a non-smoking home. 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- ITDA, not the same at all 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- np: good analogy!!!! 7-15-2009 8:47pm
- ITDA, not the same at all 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- It wouldn't bother me and we're no shoes in house 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- vba (and you sound like a big PITA) 7-15-2009 8:33pm
- You sound like an uptight beyotch. They def talk about you. 7-15-2009 8:34pm
- I don't care let them talk about me.....it is ok, just wondering what you all thought, it is ok, next year when they ask to save $1000 or more on hotel I will just say sorry....I did...(more) 7-15-2009 8:36pm everything for them too, left them food, toiletries, clean towels and bedding, it was cleaned before they came and after they left and took out their garbarge (you need a pass or have to pay to dump)....all I asked was that they not wear shoes.
- you seem to be pretty set on breaking a family relationship over a very small thing. I know this is your "rule", but no one was endangered by this and you seem to be very intent upon...(more) 7-15-2009 8:40pm taking offense over their actions. If you refuse them next year and tell them why, be prepared for a major rift from your dh's family. And don't pretend you will have no blame in that.
- np: ITA, it does seem like she has no regard how this affects DH. 7-15-2009 8:42pm +1 like
- ILs sound rather self centered. She does not have to be a doormat 7-15-2009 8:44pm
- you seem to be pretty set on breaking a family relationship over a very small thing. I know this is your "rule", but no one was endangered by this and you seem to be very intent upon...(more) 7-15-2009 8:40pm
- I don't care let them talk about me.....it is ok, just wondering what you all thought, it is ok, next year when they ask to save $1000 or more on hotel I will just say sorry....I did...(more) 7-15-2009 8:36pm
- are you asian and your il's are not? just wondering if they're racist in addition to being disrespectful 7-15-2009 8:37pm
- Possibly....just curious as to your opinion, I likely will not let them use it again....oh well. Too bad as they had a REALLY good time. It is all fine now but I do not need this...(more) 7-15-2009 8:40pm
- Loanly out your home is a very personal gesture. It is your home. 7-15-2009 8:49pm