Special Needs

  1. Special Needs Does anyone have a dc at Avenues? Are they able to handle high functioning special needs kids? 4 hr 5 min ago (4 replies)
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    • Did you read the NY Mag article? That snapshot of the parents would prevent me from considering that school 4 hr 2 min ago
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    • I know one family there whose dc spent some time at an SN school, they are very happy and the dc is thriving. 3 hr 57 min ago
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      • Op: I was told they don't have supports in place and may have taken too many kids with issues, but I'm not sure I'm buying that. It is not ideal for my dc but it has some...(more) 2 hr 47 min ago
        possibility, the robotics program being a big plus. How are class sizes?
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  2. Special Needs Can a private (mainstream) school ask you about medicating your child for ADHD? I was under the impression it was illegal to discuss medicating. Is that only in public? 4 hr 45 min ago (16 replies)
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    • Why would it be illegal, seems like a logical question. 4 hr 44 min ago
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      • I thought they could not tell you you need to medicate your child, and/or couldn't open a discussion with suggesting medication 4 hr 40 min ago
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    • Yes, they can. And if it's private, and he's disruptive, they can not renew your contract for the following year unless he gets professional help 4 hr 41 min ago
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      • So they can ask : are you going to medicate your child? 4 hr 39 min ago
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        • Why would you not want them to ask you? 4 hr 37 min ago
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          • because I thought it was illegal to ask/pressure to medicate. When we were in public, it seemed like that kind of thing was totally forbidden. 4 hr 35 min ago
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            • np: Private schools can do whatever you want. It's like "at-will" employment - you can leave or they can ask you to leave at any time. 4 hr 35 min ago
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              • ^whatever they want 4 hr 34 min ago
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              • I get that they can ask you to leave at any time, but I didn't think they could ask you to medicate. 4 hr 32 min ago
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                • They can say "you need to make XYZ changes and otherwise we will not renew your contract" - the changes can be whatever they want to ask for. 4 hr 30 min ago
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                  • OR - Our school finally did this with a little asshole in DD's class. I was so happy to see the end of that family 4 hr 29 min ago
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                    • Psst, it's not nice to refer to kids as little assholes, especially if they have issues and are trying their best. 4 hr 12 min ago
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            • I think it's best to have an open discussion about all options. 4 hr 33 min ago
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      • And public can't ask this? 4 hr 39 min ago
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        • course they can and do. But you can tell them that you take medical advice from medical experts only. And they can't not renew your contract like private school. They can start...(more) 4 hr 32 min ago
          the iep process rolling though
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        • No idea. Never heard that it was illegal to ask 4 hr 32 min ago
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  3. Special Needs How long did you let dc sleep with you? Ds needs to be in his own room. Dh lets ds stay with us because he will cry. 4 hr 55 min ago (22 replies)
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    • Does your dh want your ds to stay in his own room, or does he like having him in the bed with you? 4 hr 54 min ago
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      • No, he says ds should and can stay with us, he's little and afraid etc. 4 hr 52 min ago
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        • That is the conflict you need to resolve, then. Do you think your dh wants ds in your bed because it helps keep you guys from being intimate? Not just sex, but also from...(more) 4 hr 45 min ago
          connecting with one another, ds is a distraction?
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          • wouldn't surprise me, and ds does cry when put in his bed. I feel like we barely had the bed since he was born. 4 hr 42 min ago
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            • Is dh open to a calm talk about how you miss being in a bed with just him and how you see ds's ability to sleep alone differently? 4 hr 42 min ago
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              • I've tried. I'm being selfish, so he says. I've complained about ds in my post below about ss walking. Complete opposite of what I think or want. 4 hr 40 min ago
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                • Are you guys in couples counseling? I think if you're not seeing eye to eye on more than one thing, it's worth it to investigate. 4 hr 34 min ago
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                  • We haven't started yet. But we are going to go. I don't remember always being so different. 4 hr 32 min ago
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    • let dh sleep with him and you can sleep in dc's room. :) 4 hr 53 min ago
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      • Well, I have thought about that, but sn or not. I lose my bed to my kid. No way! 4 hr 51 min ago
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        • oh, but a whole bed to yourself? sounds kind of great to me. :) 4 hr 50 min ago
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          • he has a toddler bed, and I am pregnant. No way. I'm trying to save my marriage with dh and he wants ds in the bed. We'll divorce for sure. 4 hr 49 min ago
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            • oh, then that is a different story. how old is ds and what is his dx? 4 hr 49 min ago
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              • 3.8 cp, non verbal. 4 hr 42 min ago
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                • oh, we may have chatted earlier today. difference of opinion about walking? 4 hr 37 min ago
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                  • yes. 4 hr 36 min ago
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                    • and I'm venting because I have a wild sleeper who is forevee weeping and whining in his sleep. drives me batty. 4 hr 35 min ago
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                    • i have no answers, but i want to tell you that you have my every sympathy. nothing harder than not being on the same page as dh, and hormonal, and just doing your best and having...(more) 4 hr 35 min ago
                      it all be so tough.
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                      • ^^^i think i'm with the poster who says get him an *awesome* bed. 4 hr 35 min ago
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                      • thanks. I know I can vent here. And not to dh. 4 hr 33 min ago
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            • Get that child a queen bed with a bitchin' mattress 4 hr 44 min ago
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              • yeah, I do need to get him a bigger bed. 4 hr 41 min ago
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  4. Special Needs Ds is so out there sometimes. He will be so engaged and quick with peers but then when adults ask him questions, he always takes a really long time to respond, looks anywhere but...(more) 5 hr 29 min ago (11 replies)
    at them, sometimes says nonsensical things or needs questions repeated. Other than speech therapy, what would you recommend? Has anyone else experienced this and does it get better?? He is almost 6.
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    • social skills? 5 hr 23 min ago
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      • I've done social skills with him but he really does fine with other kids - I don't know why his processing speed seems to tank when dealing with adults. anxiety maybe?? He was a...(more) 5 hr 19 min ago
        very late talker.
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        • adults ask too many questions? 5 hr 17 min ago
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          • But the issue is his - he stands out from his peers in this area quite a bit. He just gets so lost and out of it. 5 hr 16 min ago
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            • well adults can be intimidating. 5 hr 13 min ago
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              • honestly he's like that with me a lot of the time and I'm his mom! 5 hr 11 min ago
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                • maturity may help. he might just not be "present" for adults even you. 5 hr 10 min ago
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    • Sounds like a typical almost 6yo to me. 5 hr 22 min ago
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      • no - you can see a real proessing issue with him. his peers look right at you and can answer quickly and correctly - that's not what I am seeing with ds. 5 hr 20 min ago
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    • He is 5 years old. Adults are intimidating. They are bog and louder and have power and use...(more) 3 hr 52 min ago
      words he may not know. He sounds normal.
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    • He sounds like he's afraid of saying the wrong/incorrect thing. 3 hr 51 min ago
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  5. Special Needs I don't get insurance. So they finally approve adapting seating for ds but not the seat we would like for him. So they gave us a comparable. But the seat we would like has...(more) 5 hr 33 min ago (12 replies)
    wheelchair base that we could also use that would be superior than a regular stroller that ds has managed to tear up and tip it. So do I fight them on it again? To be honest it doesn't make sense to just get the seating then come back and ask for a SN stroller when they can just add the base. Am I making any sense? Being too picky?
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    • Yes, fight, because they are EXPECTING to wear you down so you give up. 5 hr 29 min ago
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      • Yes, we were denied any adaptive equipment and appealed and now its like sure, but not what you want. Sigh. Why must it be so hard? 5 hr 26 min ago
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        • Because it costs them less to block you than to pay for what you want them to pay for. 5 hr 22 min ago
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          • I mean but if I take the seat they offer they'll probably deny the stroller! Feels never ending. 5 hr 19 min ago
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    • Why not take what they offer and just buy the base. 5 hr 27 min ago
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      • because the seat they want doesn't have a stroller base. 5 hr 25 min ago
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    • Yes-have ped write letter on your behalf-you are doubly insured correct? 5 hr 26 min ago
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      • doubly insured? we went to a sesting clinic and everything, got his measurements and of course its their job to offer the cheaper choice. 5 hr 24 min ago
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        • Private and Medicaid. Then they could pay x% and the balance to Medicaid 5 hr 21 min ago
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          • Yes. I'll call medicaid and see what they can do. 5 hr 18 min ago
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            • If they can cover cost difference you might be able to cobble together the total. GL 5 hr 15 min ago
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              • Thanks. I hope it works out the way. 5 hr 14 min ago
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  6. Special Needs My 7 yo ds loses focus a lot and can be really inattentive. I'm wondering if he has ADD. I am just lately wondering this bc it's bc a huge problem. 6 hr 28 min ago (6 replies)
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    • only one way to know for sure, but don't discount getting enough sleep and getting good protein and complex carbs all day long 6 hr 27 min ago
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      • yes, he gets all that. is there a diff b/t private evaluation vs the free one, besides that it's free? is the quality the same? 6 hr 26 min ago
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        • I don't know anything about school-district-sponsored neuropsych evaluations. I would use a neuropsychologist or a psychiatrist to get started though 6 hr 24 min ago
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          • i know, it's just that i'm tight on money. 6 hr 23 min ago
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            • ADHD is a medical diagnosis, not educational. School will not pay for neuropsych. 6 hr 22 min ago
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  7. Special Needs Moms with kids on ADHD meds, do you medicate on weekends? Ds is so hard to handle recently without meds but I feel guilty medicating on weekends. Flip side is it's awful if I am...(more) 7 hr 7 min ago (4 replies)
    constantly disciplining him when he misbehaves.
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    • I take add meds and my psych told me not to skip weekends. the goal is to keep balanced as much as possible 7 hr ago
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    • We medicate because it allows her to be more successful. She is predominantly hyperactive though. 6 hr 55 min ago
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    • We have given dd the option and she prefers to be on it on weekends. She did not like being so distracted. 6 hr 53 min ago
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    • My DD does not take them weekends nor do I ( and I have adhd). My pulse is lower on weekends...(more) 3 hr 54 min ago
      when I don't take them. However, DD and I have inattentive adhd, not hyperactive, so if your ds is out of control that is different.
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  8. Special Needs ASD book reccomendations...(more) 7 hr 19 min ago (3 replies)
    My son is 4 1/2 and moderately ASD. He has some sensory issues, language delays, social delays. I'm looking for any books for that kind of age range that deal with those things. Anything good on ASD topic really
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    • The Autism Sourcebook 7 hr 8 min ago
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    • Overcoming Autism is great, very concrete and positive, good tips. 7 hr 2 min ago
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    • rather than think about specific books I'd suggest you go to the local library and flip through every book. borrow the ones that itnrigue you. then if you want to reference them...(more) 6 hr 35 min ago
      only then would i bother to buy books.
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  9. Special Needs Want to pull out my 2nd grader and home school for remainder of the year. What do I need to do to be in compliance? 7 hr 33 min ago (3 replies)
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    • Again, only 20 days left. 7 hr 32 min ago
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    • Why do this? 7 hr 31 min ago
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    • why now? 7 hr 23 min ago
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  10. Special Needs How am I going to have my highly anxious 8yo's four cavities filled?! 7 hr 52 min ago (26 replies)
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    • gas? 7 hr 52 min ago
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    • One at a time with the help of a good pediatric dentist and laughing gas 7 hr 51 min ago
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      • this. we did 2 at a time - laughing gas, videos to watch on the flat screen in the room, patient pediatric dentists are VERY well versed at this. 7 hr 51 min ago
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        • any recos.? 7 hr 50 min ago
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          • sure - where do you live? NYC? or elsewhere? 7 hr 50 min ago
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            • Brooklyn. but would travel to manhattan for good experience 7 hr 49 min ago
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              • Downtown a lot of people love Louise Jackson...she's near NYU I believe. 7 hr 48 min ago
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              • np: This was exactly our situation, and we had a great experience with Dr. Zev Tendler. Google him. He's great, we had videos and laughing gas that he could scent with dd's...(more) 7 hr 29 min ago
                favorite flavor. I couldn't believe she got throughout with barely a blink.
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        • ^^and btw - the laughing gas takes the edge off. My DC didn't even realize he had a novacaine shot - the dr. was so fast 7 hr 50 min ago
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          • see I think it is the numbing of the novocaine that will freak her out afterwards. anything that is "not normal" feeling and she could easaily have a full on panic attack 7 hr 47 min ago
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            • I posted above about Louise Jackson. I would speak to her & ask - I hear she's great. 7 hr 47 min ago
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    • sn? 7 hr 51 min ago
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    • laughing gas? 7 hr 51 min ago
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    • We gassed my 9yo. 7 hr 51 min ago
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    • we had to do IV sedation 7 hr 51 min ago
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    • OP: I am extremely nervous about gas. weren't you? 7 hr 50 min ago
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      • OR above: no - pediatric dentists receive specific training on the nitrous oxide gas. It's pretty benign and very safe. 7 hr 49 min ago
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      • poster from above...no. My son is adhd and it was really the only way. We told him what was going to happen. He came in and practiced putting on the mask before we went. It will...(more) 7 hr 49 min ago
        be fine.
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      • np - it's very safe. What is slightly less safe is IV sedation, which some ped dentists who specialize in SN kids will do if needed - usually in a clinic attached to a hospital. 7 hr 47 min ago
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    • OP:thanks everyone 7 hr 42 min ago
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  11. Special Needs Anyone know about waldorf school? dd is 8 adhd social anxiety gen anxiety in cotaught class but very anxious worried all the time on aderall, anyway do you know about the school...(more) 8 hr ago (6 replies)
    and how much i is?? we have no money so prob impossible
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    • There are scholarships. We have one down the street and we will probably send dc when they are old enough. 7 hr 59 min ago
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    • What are you doing for the social and general anxiety? The adderall will 100% heighten those feelings, as I'm sure you know. Have you considered adding a SSRI to see if it cuts...(more) 7 hr 54 min ago
      through? Zoloft is specifically given for social anxiety
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      • yes tried zoloft terrible side effects, also intuniv which did nothing. Psych wants us to try risperidone. 4 hr 57 min ago
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        • ^^ also she sees a great child psychologist weekly, who role plays social issues with he, helps her look people in their eyes, and problem solve, it has been so helpful and I...(more) 4 hr 56 min ago
          think she will need this for a long time.
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    • adderall is exacerbating her anxiety - no amount of waldorf will counteract that. 7 hr 51 min ago
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      • she really really was like this before the meds, but I know that aderall can increase theses issues. 4 hr 55 min ago
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  12. Special Needs DD is 7 and is GREAT with animals. I really think she would benefit from a pet to take care of (with our help of course). We have a cat that she loves, but he's old and not that...(more) 8 hr 45 min ago (10 replies)
    social or patient, so it's not exactly what I'm looking at for her. I'd love to get a dog, but I think our cat would have a heart attack. Any thoughts on what would make a good pet for her? DD has learning delays, some spectrummy behavior but not diagnosed ASD. Very responsible (except when she's not -- she is 7 after all).
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    • We loved our guinea pig - unfortunately it died but it was so ridiculously social and snuggly. Easy to care for, good company really. 8 hr 44 min ago
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      • Was it OK to just have one? It wasn't lonely/socially maladjusted (for a guinea pig)? 8 hr 43 min ago
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        • No, actually they can fight. They only have one gender per store so they can't multiply. 8 hr 42 min ago
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          • ^and ones of the same gender can fight with each other. 8 hr 41 min ago
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          • itd. If you look on guinealynx they clearly say that guinea pigs are social and need a companion animal. If you get 2 baby males they will not fight (too much) 7 hr 31 min ago
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    • seriously Id get a dog. Get a trained therapeutic dog and he wont drive the cat nuts 8 hr 33 min ago
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      • where can one get a trained therapeutic dog? And do you have to document some kind of diagnosis? 8 hr 32 min ago
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        • not sure- I know two families that got them for different issues. If dc has spectrummy behavior Id put down ASD as a diagnosis anyway just to get the right type of dog. 8 hr 27 min ago
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          • np: usually therapy dogs are for children with severe disabilities. Just spectrummy behavior will not get you a therapy dog. 7 hr 53 min ago
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    • I am hoping to get a dog this weekend. 8 hr ago
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  13. Special Needs Is there any downside to having an evaluation for educational testing via the Board of Ed. Dc now 11 was last tested/evaluated if ever via of the Board of Ed at 4 years old. 9 hr 28 min ago (2 replies)
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    • i think the only downside might be that it may not be comprehensive enough. you would benefit from a private neuropsych eval. 9 hr 25 min ago
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      • np: It depends on the school and the tester. One option would be to let the school do it and then show the results to a private person and see if additional testing is needed. I...(more) 8 hr 27 min ago
        have done both. I am in the burbs and trusted the tester but I did have them looked at by someone privately and did additional testing as needed. It was much more affordable and for me easier but some don't like when the school tests b/c they will pull dc without notice ect.
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  14. Special Needs Putting on sticky. Finding it so hard coming to terms with ds's issues. Recently dx as ASD. I always suspected spectrum but When he was younger he did well at dr visits one and...(more) 10 hr 4 min ago (12 replies)
    one. I had hoped he would be doing so much better by the time he turned 9. He just had his 9th bday and it's clear that he will always face challenges. He went from ict to special Ed and a ms summer program to a special needs camp. I am in such a funk.
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    • This post has been disliked 3 times. shownot to be an asshole but it sounds like your situation is so much better than many on here, sounds like you have a lot of positive to be happy about 10 hr 2 min ago
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      • Op, really, I don't think so. It seems like most posters have kids with high IQs with social issues and/or ADHD. My ds has a low iq and watches barney still at 9. Don't get me...(more) 9 hr 58 min ago
        wrong, I know a lot of people had it worse but not most of the posters here.
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        • Np- I just posted about this last night. There seem to be so many posts about whether G&T classes can accommodate IEPs on here, it's hard when your dc will never have that problem...(more) 7 hr 28 min ago
          My 2yo is overtaking my 4.5yo in maturity and understanding, it's hard to watch.
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          • Op, same here. My 6 year old is more advanced than 9 year old in most areas. So hard. 7 hr 11 min ago
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      • np: I think anyone has the right to feel conflicted about where DC is, especially if they had to move to a more "restrictive" situation -- I don't think it means that a person...(more) 8 hr 42 min ago
        doesn't appreciate the gains. And there will always be someone with a child with more challenges and someone with a child with less.
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      • Op has a right to her feelings regardless of what others have to deal with. It's all relative. 7 hr 37 min ago
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    • Listen, 9 is VERY young to worry about ALWAYS. Tak 10 hr ago
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      • Op, I hope you are right. Ds is so immature and has no friend's. Tries socially but he doesn't know how to appropriately engage his peers. He used to be good with adults but that...(more) 9 hr 56 min ago
        has gotten worse recently.
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        • maybe you need to tweak the therapy? If interactions even with adults are worse it's probably due to the deficits and anxiety from that 7 hr 51 min ago
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    • He can still change. Don't count him out yet, but yes it does suck. No one wants tonswe their child struggle and be different. 9 hr 51 min ago
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    • Going through something similar - I hear you. I think with kids like ours, they can 'hide' and compensate when they are younger, but once older, the challenges are more apparent....(more) 7 hr 52 min ago
      I still try to focus on the strengths
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      • Op, exactly. It's so hard to see the gap btn ds and his peers widen. 7 hr 9 min ago
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  15. Special Needs Everything is packed we move tomorrow! 10 hr 16 min ago (3 replies)
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    • whoops sorry meant for toddler. 10 hr 16 min ago
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    • where are you moving? how exciting! 10 hr 15 min ago
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      • a few mins away, same neighborhood(forest hills) 10 hr 15 min ago
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  16. Special Needs Anyone else have a child with horrific handwriting skills? My dc is in K and writing is maybe at a 3.5 age level. Can not write name or draw. Has been doing well in ICT, but...(more) 10 hr 24 min ago (9 replies)
    teacher and OT say this is going to be a prob next year. We are considering holding her back, but she is doing well (for a kid on the spectrum) in all other aspects of school. Any advice?
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    • I would not hold back without consulting with a NP and having a somewhat long term game plan for dealing with this issue. I'd also suggest starting keyboarding now so dc can...(more) 9 hr 39 min ago
      start on it as early as 3 rd or 4th. Your dc will need to know how to write but once that is mastered you can move to a lap top. You also may need to talk about testing ect. Time for a np
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      • I disagree. The demands the kids are under right now in PS is outrages. If I were in your position I would listen to the...(more) 7 hr 34 min ago
        E
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        • ^^^teachers. If there are social issues as well dc may benefit from holding back. 1st grade is rigorous....(more) 7 hr 32 min ago
          I agree about the NP testing though.
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      • Thanks we NP when she turned right before she turned 4 (Dec bday). Going to book another fall. 7 hr 16 min ago
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        • dec bday then hold back a year 5 hr 19 min ago
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    • my dd has hemiparesis, a form of cp that affects one side of her body. I think she would have been right handed (the affected side) because she is quite behind in fine motor in...(more) 7 hr 25 min ago
      her "unaffected" hand. She is 4.5 and can't draw anything, still sometimes freezes up writing her name (and it's 3 letters). Maybe it's also a motor planning issue, because I find she writes much more smoothly when I draw 2 dots for her to connect to start her off on the first letter
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      • ^^ I am starting her in K next year and will probably hold her back for a second year of K, but she is also socially immature. 7 hr 24 min ago
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    • I would not hold back over this. Once you hold back then all services are based on...(more) 3 hr 58 min ago
      how your child is doing compared to grade peers (not age) so services are harder to get if DC needs them. Holding back is fine IF the only problem is maturity. If there is a real disability, then you can do the child a disservice.
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    • I wouldn't hold back just for this. Can you get her some extra help with this over the Summer? 3 hr 57 min ago
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  17. Special Needs Are there any parents on this board from suffolk county who were able to receive dual recommendation for your child?...(more) 10 hr 31 min ago (0 replies)
    center-based half day or full day program plus ABA services at home. If you did please please get back to me. We are trying to have this program for dc and it seems very hard.
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  18. Special Needs NYC moms - have you put in window air conditioners yet? A few people on our street have 10 hr 42 min ago (4 replies)
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    • last week 10 hr 39 min ago
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    • not yet--we usually have by now, but dh keeps putting it off. it has been HOT in our apt recently and i'm cranky. but it looks like a cold front is coming through, so we'll...(more) 10 hr 39 min ago
      probably wait until next week.
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    • this weekend for the kids. 10 hr 39 min ago
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    • We have windowless and used it yesterday. 7 hr 26 min ago
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  19. Special Needs What do you think of this article?...(more) 10 hr 50 min ago (0 replies)
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/22/sap-autism-recruit-employees-programmers_n_3320900.html
    I think it would be wonderful if this became the norm. Playing to a person’s strengths regardless of SNs or NT.
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  20. Special Needs Any have a link to a great beet/quinoa salad recipe? 10 hr 57 min ago (1 reply)
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    • both or either/ or...(more) 9 hr ago
      ?
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  21. Special Needs How has your dh handled dc's SN? Wondering specifically about when you started getting services 11 hr 3 min ago (5 replies)
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    • He was sad for a bit. had hope it would cure ds. not the case. 10 hr 54 min ago
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    • Not very well. The first year and through EI he constantly told me I was over reacting and our twins...(more) 10 hr 51 min ago
      would grow out of their issues, he didn’t really accept any of it and had the attitude of humoring me. We’re second year of CPSE and he is starting to see the differences between our kids and other kids their age. He is starting to get involved very slowly but it’s still mainly me.
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      • op - I have that feeling with dh as well. There's this sort of pause before he says, "okay" when we talk about it, like he's reserving judgement and is saving up to just blow up....(more) 10 hr 48 min ago
        But I have to keep pursuing it alone, right? Keep him updated but don't depend on his approval.
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        • Absolutely. It's not about him, it's about your child. Just ask him to give the services a chance. There's no harm in it and it's free. 10 hr 36 min ago
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    • My DH has been amazing. While he cannot keep track of the details and minutiae of getting services and keeping track of therapy. But because he has his own social challenges and...(more) 6 hr 45 min ago
      is well aware of them, he is totally on board with everything and appreciates what I do to follow through on their behalf.
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  22. Special Needs I need a summer tote for being out and about with dc. Need room for diapers, water bottle, etc. but want something cute and maybe nautical. Suggestions! 11 hr 42 min ago (2 replies)
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  23. Special Needs Whomever suggested contacting ECDC for my ds, thank you so much! Spoke to someone in the Brooklyn office, and they are going to try to push him through for Early Intervention (he...(more) 11 hr 43 min ago (3 replies)
    is 2.8). She was able to get the ball rolling, and explained everything. Thanks again!
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    • This board has been great for me. I think I would have still been calling places! 11 hr 42 min ago
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    • It was me. I'm so glad it helped! I wish someone had told me about it way back when. Good luck & keep us posted, 6 hr 7 min ago
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      • ^^FWIW - we started the ball rolling with EI at the same age. We simultaneously went through EI and CPSE (december birthday, so school placement didn't happen until this past...(more) 6 hr 1 min ago
        fall). It was a lot to swallow and we had a HORRIBLE EI speech therapist who cancelled more than 50% of the time, but he was only in EI for 5 weeks and we were able to get a much better SLP for CPSE.
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  24. Special Needs Is a neurologist the first stop after ped if concerned about low tone in a pre-schooler? 11 hr 54 min ago (6 replies)
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    • OT and PT and maybe speech eval through your school district. Many people do not see a neurologist at all, some do. 11 hr 52 min ago
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    • if you feel something big is causing it, or neuro related yes. We did PT eval and got our dx from a neurologist and ds low tone turned out to be muscular dystrophy. 11 hr 51 min ago
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    • There are so many big and small things that can cause low tone, that I would get a neuro eval. to make sure there isn't something big going on that you need to know about. Once...(more) 11 hr 45 min ago
      that's done, you can rely more on OT/PT going forward.
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    • op - Great, thanks all. 11 hr 45 min ago
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    • this was in infancy but we did see a neuro to start but I was worried about CP etc. we did EI eval and got PT services and eventually saw a dev ped in toddler stage. 11 hr 24 min ago
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    • My DD is low tone. We had an EI evaluation done that turned up some other things as well. She's been getting OT .PT, and ST for years and the low tone is no longer a real issue...(more) 10 hr 23 min ago
      and she's doing great.
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  25. Special Needs Feel like a jerk. Ds has CP, walks very slow and needs lots of support. I made him walk to therapy today, as I felt I was too laxed with him earlier in the week. Fast forward, I...(more) 12 hr 15 min ago (30 replies)
    get a stern talk by his PT about how tired he was and why the session ended way more earlier than it should. And too be fair this isn't the first time she has said this. I feel bad, because he was so wiped out he could barely hold his head up. Is it wrong of me though to feel as though he needs to learn to walk out in the real world and not in a controlled environment like therapy. I still feel bad because he iwas crying and when dh asked him what was wrong he kept motioning to his legs. And now dh is mad at me because he thinks I am being a drill sargent with ds. He prefers ds just gets pushed everywhere though. But nonetheless I feel bad.
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    • maybe have him walk on days he's not going to therapy? 12 hr 14 min ago
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      • well that would just be sat and sunday. most of those days its us indoors and stuff. 12 hr 13 min ago
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    • you did what you thought was right at the time. don't beat yourself up. try to find a happy medium. ds can probably use a little challenge, but try to watch for his cues too. 12 hr 13 min ago
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      • The thing with ds is,, he is very lazy and yes it sounds rude and harsh but if you gave him the choice he would always choose the wheelchair. He will not try otherwise. 12 hr 11 min ago
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        • push him, but take it in baby steps. maybe don't make him walk the whole way, but some part of the way. 12 hr 10 min ago
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          • I'll try that more often. 12 hr 7 min ago
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          • or maybe make him walk home afterwards so that you wear him out after, not before, something 11 hr 57 min ago
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            • he's usually worn out after therapy anyway. 11 hr 55 min ago
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              • then maybe put this on hiatus until he's not worn out afterwards 11 hr 35 min ago
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                • sigh. That will be the day. 11 hr 34 min ago
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    • You feel bad because a professional dressed you down for your actions. But you're still the parent and if your gut says he should walk, he probably should. 12 hr 13 min ago
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    • Physical therapist here. For every block you...(more) 12 hr 13 min ago
      Walk it's like climbing a hill for him. His body has to work extra hard. Why not compromise and bring the chair and he walks one block.
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      • I do bring the chair. I always have the chair but he also shuts down a lot and sometimes will not move unless in the chair. And if he is with dh he doesn't even bring his walker...(more) 12 hr 9 min ago
        at all. If he sees the chair he wants it. I know he can make it. We take lots of breaks.
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    • perhaps have him out walking, but not right before or after therapy so he gets a break 12 hr 13 min ago
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    • we all, ALL, make mistakes with our kids that are clear in hindsight. nt kids, sn kids, doesn't matter. re-read your post, and you will realize that your intentions were good, and...(more) 12 hr 12 min ago
      that you now understand that therapy days aren't great for extra work. don't waste a second of your time feeling upset or guilty about it! just use the knowledge you gained today, and try something different next time.
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      • Yeah. But I feel I am the only one who encourages his walking. Even at school they just push him around unless he goes to pt. I dont understand. he'll barely walk if I don't make...(more) 12 hr 8 min ago
        him.
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        • why don't you & dh talk to school & pt to work out some kind of schedule or standard for when he should be walking? that way everyone is on the same page, and some of the emotion...(more) 12 hr 7 min ago
          can be taken out of the decision.
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          • We all disagree on his primary mode of transportation. School PT thinks he is far off from walking. And its easier for them to push him etc. Safety concerns etc. And for him to...(more) 12 hr 2 min ago
            get to school he has to be in his chair, they won't let him walk on the bus, there goes more walking time etc. He gets maybe 45 mins a day of PT where he walks. And in pt they are working on pushing a wheelchair, so its like they are crushing his chances of walking! If I don't let him walk the block or two to the store or the bus or something he would barely walk out in the street which he is terrified of. And dh just doesn't have the patience imo to let him walk so he rather push him. So frustrating
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            • The industrial building where I take dd to therapy has a small movie studio in it, a woman with CP works there who walks to and from work with her walker, independently. IMO it's...(more) 7 hr 17 min ago
              more important to build independence than to save energy for therapy, 1/2 of which is "bring the toy over the pillow! Yay! Now it's time to swing!"
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              • I am trying to get him independence. No one seems to get it but me. He can walk, he works hard just to stand, but perhaps walking won't be his only way of transportstion, but PT...(more) 5 hr 5 min ago
                seems to just stretch him and push him around. I want him to get used to walking, he never will if I push him all the time. He barely walks as it is.
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    • How far is the walk? We're just starting to have dyspraxic/hypotonic ds walk more. We keep it to very short outings, and keep a weather eye. When he looks tired, back in the...(more) 11 hr 41 min ago
      stroller.
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      • The walk was 3 blocks. I drove most of the way. I don't always want to put him in his chair. He builds no endurance that way and he has and can pretend to be so tired because he...(more) 11 hr 38 min ago
        just doesnt even want to try
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    • interesting. My dd has mild CP, her PT told us to try to make her walk a mile a day, the more she walks the better. And once a week she arrives at PT/OT after having had swimming...(more) 7 hr 20 min ago
      class at school and her PT said swimming is better than her therapy, it's worth it for her to be tired. Dd is 4.5.
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      • If he is tired, it seems good to me. It means his muscles are working! As soon as he slows down even slower dh is ready to strap him in. Why do I have to feel like a bad guy for...(more) 5 hr 1 min ago
        making him walk a block. If I didnt no one else would. Walking across a room once doesn't count to me. He needs to learn how to walk in the streets side walks etc. I realized we did a diservice when he freaked because a twig was in his way. No twigs in therapy. He cant even do stairs so he will barely know to do those. I'm ranting but excuse me for wanting him to walk without whining or stopping for half a block.
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    • I think that it is good that you push . . . 7 hr 17 min ago
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    • is he in PT 5x a week? How about saving the walks for those days when he doesn't have therapy? On the days he does have therapy, mabye a shorter stroll. 5 hr 1 min ago
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      • yes therapy 5x a week. 3 of which is private therapy. if he didn't have he would lose the skill to stand i feel. I let him resy sat and sunday because I recognize he works hard...(more) 4 hr 57 min ago
        mon-Fri. But a block or two to the store 3x a week doesn't seem like abuse to me and it was 3 blocks to therapy. Normally yes I push him in, especially if we park a little far because I make him walk to the car. Excercise if I pushed him everywhere he would barely walk!
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        • can you do one block and back daily (not anytime near therapy) and then reward him with iPad or something else? I agree with you on the pushing. 4 hr 56 min ago
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          • Thats the thing therapy is right after school for him. So he gets home and we immediately have to leave for therapy. Mon, weds and friday. Call me crazy but I wanted 4 days of...(more) 4 hr 53 min ago
            private therapy. Dh made me lower it. Once again I am the only one pushing!
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