Special Needs

  1. Special Needs Need advice. For the past few years my dh and I have been dreaming of moving to northern CA and finally took the plunge and put our place on the market a few months ago (it has...(more) 17 min ago (4 replies)
    not sold yet). Meanwhile, my 2yo db was recently evaluated through EI and it looks like he will qualify for some services in NY (6 hr per wk therapeutic nursery program, plus 2x/wk OT, and 2x/wk play therapy). The dx was anxiety d/o plus sensory processing disorder. Even though I realize that these services would likely benefit my son, my dh and I are a bit on the fence about pulling our home from the market and staying in nyc for another year. We have both been deeply unhappy here the last couple of years and feel like our quality of life as a family would be so much better in CA which we feel would have a positive benefit on our db regardless of services. If we moved we would still plan to seek private OT, speech, and play therapy (but he would lose the therapeutic nursery component). He has also made enormous strides in the last couple of mos. which makes things more confusing in the sense that we are unsure how much he really needs at this point. Sorry for the long post. ti
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    • I don't have SN dcs, but I would move. Get out of NYC so you can focus on your family. 15 min ago
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    • ^^OP: Sorry for the long and confused post. We are unsure what to do at this point and would love any advice or guidance. tia 15 min ago
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    • he is 2yo. The anxiety thing I don't get (my ds has anxiety adn SPD and the anxiety didn't ocme out till later). Anyway, I would move 7 min ago
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    • I am a big believer in doing what's right for your WHOLE family. If you have the $ to offer therapies privately in CA, and you and your dh would be happier there overall, it makes...(more) 5 min ago
      much more sense. NY has a lot going for it therapy wise, but what is the point if you're miserable day to day? It's not worth it.
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  2. Special Needs For those of you who have to drag toddlers to therapy appts that are not close to home, do you rely on the bus, subway, cab? I am feeling like the subway and bus is going to be...(more) 23 min ago (5 replies)
    too time consuming for the amount of appts to which I am going to have to drag my 2yo. Tempted to just take cabs to a couple of the appts but don't feel comfortable taking him in a cab without a car seat. Anyone btdt? Should I look into a car service that comes equipped with car seats? I don't want his whole day to be spent on the subway or bus and need to be able to get home in time for his naps. tia
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    • Legends is a good car service with car seats but don't 2 years old mainly get services through EI at home for this exact reason? 20 min ago
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      • OP: My 2yo needs a lot of help with socialization so he will likely be attending a therapeutic nursery program that is center based 3 mornings per week. We currently take him...(more) 13 min ago
        downtown to see a private play therapist which we will continue to do plus he will need to attend OT 3x per week and a private speech therapy appt 1x wk (he did not qualify for ST through EI but my dh and I both feel like he would benefit so we will pay privately for now). It will be a lot of shlepping...
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    • My grandmother used to take her autistic dd and my infant mother to all of her dd's appointments in the city by train and bus. They lived in Brooklyn and the appointments were in...(more) 19 min ago
      Manhattan, all over. It was the 50s. It took all day.
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      • ^Which I know doesn't help you, but I just thought I'd share. 18 min ago
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    • we did subway/bus. it sucked but cabs would have been really expensive and only marginally faster, especially anywhere near rush hour when cabs sit in traffic and can be hard to...(more) 1 min ago
      find.
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  3. Special Needs Is is difficult to get a para in an ict class? dc is very anxious and neefs extra support at times. No dx but I strongly suspect ASD. 1 hr 19 min ago (3 replies)
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    • @@ 1 hr 17 min ago
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      • np: What does this mean? OP, fwiw I do know kids on the spectrum in ICT classes who have paras...sometimes it helps, other times it has not helped enough to make that big a...(more) 1 hr 15 min ago
        classroom work for them.
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    • you'll need an evaluation to assess need and a dx would certainly help. what is on current iep? what is basis for ict placement? 1 hr ago
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  4. Special Needs ADHD 6 yo is worse off his meds than he was before we ever started meds, but better on his meds than before we started meds. Is this common or should we find a different...(more) 2 hr 19 min ago (2 replies)
    medication?
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    • I would discuss this with the shrink. it takes time to work on these things--while on meds, your kid can start to learn appropriate behaviors and habits. Eventually, these will...(more) 2 hr 18 min ago
      help during non-medicated times. But don't expect change to be quick.
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    • Probably because now off of them he's rebounding, and also because he's used to how he feels when he's on them - being off can really throw off some kids & it's not worth it. 7 min ago
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  5. Special Needs Our babysitter has been picking up both DS and my nephew from camp this week. Normaly we pay $220 for Tuesday to Friday, 3-6pm, for one kid. Should I just double for this week?...(more) 3 hr 3 min ago (29 replies)
    TIA!
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    • pikcing up and watching, or dropping at his own house? 3 hr 3 min ago
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      • Picking up and bringing to our house with DS. DS is 11 and nephew is 8. So she picks up at 4, brings them hom, leaves by 6. 3 hr 2 min ago
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        • def not double! 3 hr 1 min ago
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          • One and a half times as much? 3 hr 1 min ago
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            • i think like they say below , extra 100 or 150 tops really. 3 hr ago
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              • OK, so about half as much again works. Thanks! 2 hr 58 min ago
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        • I do t think it is necessary 3 hr ago
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    • That seems excessive to me. What does she do with them? 3 hr 2 min ago
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      • Pick them up at 4, bring them to park and then home. Leaves by 6pm. 3 hr 1 min ago
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    • No 3 hr 2 min ago
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    • same camp? deliver both kids to same address? or different camps delivering kids to different addresses? 3 hr 2 min ago
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      • Same to same 3 hr 2 min ago
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        • add $100 and you're good --- unless she's watching all day, too. then make it a total addition of $150. you want to keep her happy. but, no need to double. 3 hr 1 min ago
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          • forget it, just saw that she is only staying with them 2 hrs. $100 -- she will be very pleased with this. 3 hr ago
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          • No, not all day. Just the "after school" shift. 3 hr ago
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    • Is the neohew's mother paying? Or you? Either way, I'd maybe give her another $100 for the week and call it a day. 3 hr ago
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      • Nephew's mother is a heroin addicted, evil witch (but I digress). I'm paying--and happy to do it. 2 hr 59 min ago
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    • Where I live, childcare for one kid runs about $15 an hour, for two runs $17 to $20. No way double! You should have negotiated a rate BEFORE she started picking up your nephew,...(more) 3 hr ago
      btw
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      • oh shut up. this isn't corporate america. np 3 hr ago
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        • OP here--She's been with us for 6 years, doing these times all year long. I didn't negotiate ahead because she'd never name a price. 2 hr 58 min ago
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          • np: exactly. giving her the $100 is extra and shows your appreciation. she sounds wonderful. 2 hr 57 min ago
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    • Sorry to post on SN! But you gave great advice :) 2 hr 57 min ago
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    • in NYC i feel like standard is +50% for an extra kid, so $330/ week no $440 2 hr 56 min ago
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      • I thinkt that's what I'll do. Thanks! 2 hr 55 min ago
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      • I don't think so, if you pay $15/hour for one kid, you don't pay $22.50/hr for 2 2 hr 54 min ago
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        • in one family no, but that's what i've seen in nanny share arrangements 1 hr 21 min ago
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    • $300 2 hr 55 min ago
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    • Add $100 2 hr 15 min ago
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  6. Special Needs Toddler SPD 2yo will only eat crunchy food, how do I get some calcium into her? (Won't drink/eat milk, yogurt, cheese 2 sec ago (0 replies) unsticky | permalink | save | hide | 3 hr 15 min ago (5 replies)
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    • Does kale have calcium? I could swear I read it did - if it does, roasting kale till it gets crunchy is very easy! 3 hr 13 min ago
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    • Can you give examples of what she likes? it can be pretty easy to add powdered milk to a variety of things. Also, lots of crunchy vegetables have calcium (peppers, for example) 3 hr 13 min ago
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    • Funny, mine is the same. How about those parmesan crisps? 3 hr 7 min ago
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      • ^^^ Maybe edmame? Also, kale chips. Google high calcium foods, and I bet you'll be surprised by how many crunchy things are on there. 3 hr 7 min ago
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    • will sweet milkshakes work? or OJ with calcium? keep in mind that a kid that age does not need as much calcium as we tend to feed in the US 43 min ago
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  7. Special Needs Long story, but short version is that my mom is caring for my 8 yo nephew who has been diagnosed with ADHD. On second type of meds, with little noticable difference. School...(more) 4 hr 36 min ago (25 replies)
    seems to be dragging feet about getting him support in classroom (he almost failed 3rd grade) and my mom doesn't know how to help him. Is there such a person who can help families come up with a plan for something like this? Including what kinds of doctors to see, accommodations to push for, etc. In Philadelphia, if that helps. TIA!
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    • Psychiatrist and psychologists could be able to help with getting meds correct and therapy. There also might be some group therapies, like social skills that would help. The...(more) 4 hr 33 min ago
      school should be able to point you in the right direction.
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    • what kind of doctor are you seeing? my son's shrink has been our rock. 4 hr 33 min ago
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      • Just a GP 4 hr 18 min ago
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        • you need a shrink, STAT 3 hr 35 min ago
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    • tell her to call chop sw dept 4 hr 31 min ago
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      • What is SW? 4 hr 18 min ago
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        • maybe SE? special ed? 3 hr 50 min ago
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          • or social work? 3 hr 50 min ago
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            • Oh thanks! I'm new to the lingo! 3 hr 48 min ago
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    • BTDT - Public? He needs a 504 to receive Accommodations IF he doesn't need remedial help. Many ADHD kids are super smart but can't focus so they start failing. You need to find...(more) 3 hr 30 min ago
      out if he needs remedial help to pull him up to grade level. The neuro-psych he took (or equivalent) will tell you if he needs remedial help. IF he needs remedial help for his academics he will needs IEP instead of a 504. This forces the school to do what needs to be done to help him - by law. Go on ADDitudemag.org - It's got tons of resources including webinars for all of this. You have to push them - be his advocate.
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      • Yes, public. They want to wait until 2 weeks into the year to discuss. I'll ask my mom if he has the report from his initial eval. It was ages ago and it probably needs to be...(more) 3 hr 28 min ago
        re-done.
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        • Do not wait for the school. She should put that meeting request in by early Augušt to make sure the meeting happens. Schools will delay and delay. She's going to need to...(more) 3 hr 19 min ago
          advocate for him.
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          • OR here - In my area (Not NY) you don't need one. If you are informed and push push push - they will listen because they have to by law - If she knows the law, she'll be ok. 3 hr 16 min ago
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            • np: sorry don't need a what? A meeting? 3 hr 15 min ago
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              • an advocate (like a lawyer or someone you pay to work on your behalf) 3 hr 11 min ago
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                • ^ I misread - sorry :) 3 hr 10 min ago
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                • Oh - I was confused because the previous poster said that the mom is going to have TO advocate for her dc! Not hire AN advocate. :) 3 hr 9 min ago
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        • My son was diagnosed in 2nd grade (eval then) and is going into 7th. I've never had to redo - You need to show them the report of the initial eval, get a letter from your ped...(more) 3 hr 18 min ago
          stating the diagnosis as well, 2 more letters from last year's teachers on their observations. Call school and ask for person in charge of 504/IEP's - There is always someone. Don't wait because it takes a bit to get on their books for the formal meeting.
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          • This is the kind of advice we need! We are new to this and my mom (who is 65) is now mother to 3 more kids. I'm afraid we won't find the original report. The parents are not...(more) 3 hr 12 min ago
            great at keeping important things.
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            • Try to find the original diagnosis doctor. Also, ask his pediatrician if it's on file. Get a copy from one of them. A new evaluation will cost a few thousand so look hard for it! 3 hr 10 min ago
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              • OK, will do. They were evicted, so I have no idea where it is, but my brother may have it. Thanks! 3 hr 9 min ago
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    • OP here: To sum up, we need to push the school to meet before school starts (with the person in charge of 504's) and we need to find the original diagnosis report. And we need a...(more) 3 hr 7 min ago
      psychologist too. OK, we can do that. Luckily there is health insurance! Thanks to you all.
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      • Your welcome - Come back and ask questions any time. SN board is very helpful 3 hr 4 min ago
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        • Thank you. I feel like we have a long way to go (and I don't live close to them). I'll be back, I'm sure! 3 hr 2 min ago
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  8. Special Needs What can be done about impulse control. 6yo ASD ds. Example: can't stop himself from sneak eating sugar packets at restaurants. 15 hr 34 min ago (9 replies)
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    • Firstly that's a behavior that can be modified 15 hr 32 min ago
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      • You mean the sugar packet eating specifically? Or that impulse control in general can be modified? Either way, how?? Book rec? 15 hr 29 min ago
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    • remove the sugar packets from the table. That is what I used to do to prevent dc from eating them. 6 hr 57 min ago
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      • I do. And the full glasses of water and knives and salt shakers... but hoping to sunset this practice by helping ds develop impulse control. 6 hr 47 min ago
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      • np: the problem with this is there is some item in EVERY situation. for our dc it's hitting buttons, throwing things in the toilet, slamming doors, dumping out drink all over...(more) 5 hr 58 min ago
        plate, poking people in the eyes, etc. OP - I've got nothing. All the advice we've gotten involves being able to be 100% 1:1 with dc (which is, of course, impossible if you have more than one dc or ever need to cook, clean, go to the bathroom or carry anything). And on those rare occasions when we can be on him we can stop the behaviors by reminding ahead of time when we see dc getting that look in the eye. But even if it's been weeks for any given behavior, as soon as we let our guard down dc goes right back to it. It's incredibly frustrating. So we remove what is feasible (e.g. stand in front of elevator buttons if we can).
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        • Thanks for this honest reply. 5 hr 32 min ago
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          • i will say that our dc is only 3 - so there may be something better for 6 y.o! i certainly hope so. 5 hr 27 min ago
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            • np: Redirection has been most successful for us. 3yo was such a hard age. I used to travel around with light-up gadgets and other toys in my pockets to take out at these moments....(more) 3 hr 20 min ago
              Over time my dc did develop way better impulse control so a lot of it, when your kid is really young and a big mess like mine was, is about minimizing temptation, distraction, getting dc the hell out of places fast if at all possible, and other crisis management techniques.
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    • It's hard. You have to tackle it from a behavioral approach, and if that doesn't work, do both behavioral & meds. 6 min ago
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  9. Special Needs This post has been disliked 6 times. showJews who move from the us and other countries to serve in the idf are like Americans who go fight jihad wars 16 hr 30 min ago (8 replies)
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    • you really are not adhering to the spirit of the special needs boards 16 hr 30 min ago
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      • no, her post is very special needs 16 hr 26 min ago
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        • your remark also has no place on the special needs board. this is the safety zone. 16 hr 25 min ago
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    • Is it bad that I hope I've never given you helpful advice? Probably, but I still feel this way. 16 hr 28 min ago
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      • Np-wow! Ugly 16 hr 27 min ago
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        • Ok. She's allowed to say what she wants, then so am I. 16 hr 24 min ago
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    • not really. they are not in it to kill. the join to be part of the defense of the jewish people. They want to belong. 16 hr 26 min ago
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      • this makes no sense to post here and I am notvexpressing my political viewd. 15 hr 30 min ago
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  10. Special Needs I haven't come here in a while. Just want to say my former FTT/tube fed db...(more) 16 hr 37 min ago (4 replies)
    Is hovering near the 50th percentile! He's still not a bug eater but I make every bite count!
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    • bugs have lots of protein. just kidding. good news! 16 hr 36 min ago
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    • Georgia mom? This is so exciting!! 16 hr 17 min ago
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    • love stories like this! super news! 16 hr 2 min ago
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  11. Special Needs 3.5yr autistic DS seems to be getting worse :-(...(more) 17 hr 29 min ago (7 replies)
    His eyes look more spacey and unfocused, getting harder to make eye contact. He's harder to engage in activity. Just seems to be getting more special needs and I'm starting to think it's not mild. Doing all the right things - engaging with dev ped, school, therapists. But just feel overall tired, hopeless and sad. I think I'm just fighting a losing battle. What's the point.
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    • Im sorry. Stay strong. 17 hr 28 min ago
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      • Thanks. I hoped autism would get better with age but it's not so far. 17 hr 22 min ago
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    • is he at a SN preschool? 17 hr 28 min ago
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      • Yes. That's going ok from what they tell me. Who knows. 17 hr 26 min ago
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        • Than you should find solace in what they tell you. What's the point? He's your child, and he's only 3.5 and you are have no choice but to fight for his progress. There is no...(more) 4 hr 39 min ago
          alternative.
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    • Some might say he's working on another skill. 17 hr 20 min ago
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    • When was your last appt with the dev. ped? If you really think he's getting worse, get him into the dr. for an assessment asap. 5 min ago
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  12. Special Needs I think I'll just post here. Advice needed....(more) 18 hr 9 min ago (8 replies)
    I have 6 month old we just moved back to NYC from The Netherlands. New pediatrician doesn't seem to think I need to worry about db. Who is very floppy and still immature in development. 2 other kids who were not like this. He doesn't smile or reach out doesn't roll and doesn't hold his head up. He's very much limp. Cries and arches when you talk to him or make noise I notice. The only problem ped has is with his weight and thinks he has reflux he spits up a lot but I notice that when we feed him. Medicine doesn't seem to work and he only wants to nurse but he doesn't latch properly. Who can we call to look at him? I already made an appointment to a gastrointestinal doctor for him. Would he qualify for therapy but I am unsure because ped doesn't care.
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    • see another ped 18 hr 7 min ago
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    • if you are concerned, get an evaluation for early intervention. peds can be pretty clueless about developmental delays 18 hr 7 min ago
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      • What's a good place to start? I asked pediatrician and he said it was too early to tell if there was a problem. 18 hr 5 min ago
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        • call one of the agencies - your ped plays no role in the process 17 hr 49 min ago
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        • np: I would call early intervention (YAI for example). 17 hr 29 min ago
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          • evaluations or referrals, please call 1-866-2-YAI-LINK or e-mail link@yai.org 4 hr 5 min ago
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    • This sounds like motor development issues to my BTDT ears. I'd get an EI evaluation. Regular pediatricians typically have no clue about this stuff. Probably oral motor issues...(more) 4 hr 39 min ago
      re: latch/not having the milk go down right. Feeding therapist helped us a lot with similar issues. GL.
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    • Follow your gut instinct and get an evaluation via EI or see a dev ped. Our pediatrician assured us that everything was fine - cut to age 2.11 - dx'd with PDD-NOS (mild Autism) I...(more) 2 hr 7 min ago
      wish I had followed my gut instinct.
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  13. Special Needs Anyone see this about autism? Genes play a much bigger role than environment apparently......(more) 23 hr 22 min ago (6 replies)
    • makes perfect sense to me 23 hr 19 min ago
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      • Yup, runs in my family. 22 hr 51 min ago
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        • Agreed. Never bought into the environmental hype. 19 hr 16 min ago
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          • now of course, they're highlighting the role of insecticides in pre=natal development which is something I always wonder about since I was sitting at home pregnant while they...(more) 4 hr 7 min ago
            fogged my neighborhood when I was 3 - 6 months pregnant and now we have a DC - a lot like his speech impaired, somewhat quirky dad - who is either high level autistic, pdd and or adhd...at any rate, developmentally challenged.
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    • yes. It totally runs in my family on my mother and father's side... 13 hr 28 min ago
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    • best news I've heard in a while. tx for posting. 5 hr 17 min ago
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  14. Special Needs How do you get DC to generalize pragmatics? DC has been working on this for so long with ST, does well in sessions with her, but when it comes to utilizing it/having conversations...(more) 7-24-2014 1:51pm (5 replies)
    with peers IRL, it's like he can't do it. I find this so frustrating. Anyone BTDT?
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    • friends started having dc do ST with another child so there was a non-adult to practice on. they said it helped and eventually moved to groups. our dc is not there yet. 7-24-2014 1:54pm
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      • I have found it VERY difficult finding a ST who does dyads. They all seem to work 1:1. How did she find this? 7-24-2014 1:56pm
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        • no idea - it was private pay. i don't think you could do that with an RSA due to how STs are paid. 7-24-2014 2:01pm
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          • I've even looked private pay - just can't find anyone. 7-24-2014 2:10pm
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    • does dc have a sibling? 4 hr 44 min ago
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  15. Special Needs Would you try a social skills group run by a middle school social worker (but the group is for elementary aged kids)? 7-24-2014 1:18pm (7 replies)
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    • sure 7-24-2014 1:19pm
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    • social skills has been very helpful for my 5 yo so far 7-24-2014 1:19pm
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      • we've tried a few in the past & all have been a big bust. 7-24-2014 1:22pm
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        • This post has been disliked 5 times. showthen don't do it anymore. wtf 7-24-2014 1:24pm
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          • np: we don't talk to each other that way on the SN board! 7-24-2014 1:30pm
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    • sure 7-24-2014 1:19pm
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    • Yes, no harm in trying. 16 hr 51 min ago
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  16. Special Needs What do I need to do/say to justify getting a SEIT? I'm the mom who posted a couple of days before that my kid's teacher is suggesting we ask for one because of his oppositional...(more) 7-24-2014 12:10pm (22 replies)
    and defiant behavior. What kind of a case do I need to make?
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    • beats the fuck out of me. I just had my psych eval and they basically said he wouldn't get services although teachers all think he needs them for fine motor and sensory 7-24-2014 12:11pm
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    • How old is your dc? 7-24-2014 12:12pm
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      • he's 4 and a half 7-24-2014 12:13pm
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        • he has an IEP currently, but it's only for OT. 7-24-2014 12:13pm
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          • 4.5 is a tough age for this, because he's turning 5 and will go from being covered by CPSE to CSE...and then no SEITs any more. 7-24-2014 12:14pm
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            • op: although because of his January birthday he's actually going into pre-K in the fall. So we can have one year of SEIT, right? 7-24-2014 12:17pm
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              • my advice isn't that specific in this area... 7-24-2014 12:17pm
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              • Just seeing this now but wanted to reply to you. Hope you stickied. SEIT here. You are correct. Goes by year of birth. If he will be 5 this coming January, you have SEIT until...(more) 21 hr 17 min ago
                August. SEIT doesn't just end on actual birthday. Hope this helps. Post back if you have more questions and I can try to help
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              • are you in NYC? 2 hr 5 min ago
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            • np: we got it from CPSE up to his 5th birthday. they even offered us one at CAMP (but we declined it). It was for Sensory Processing Disorder (sensory seeking), but the...(more) 7-24-2014 12:17pm
              preschool did a very good report on his behaviors. You get the preschool behind you (ours came to our meeting with CPSE) and you can get ALOT from CPSE. After that, we got NOTHING. He is now ADHD and entering first and he is eligible for nothing, even though the teachers keep trying and banging their heads against the wall.
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              • ^^^we got 2 hours of SEIT per day in a 4.5 hour per day preschool program. 7-24-2014 12:18pm
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                • ^^^I saw your question above. I think CPSE covers you the whole time you're in Preschool, but I have an August ds, so I don't know if turning 5 is the magic number, or if...(more) 7-24-2014 12:19pm
                  entering K is what changes coverage.
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                  • op: thanks. I need to check this out. 7-24-2014 12:19pm
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                    • yeah.... definitely. do you have a meeting scheduled yet? get your preschool on board and have them emphasize the difficult behaviors and how hard it is for him to learn when...(more) 7-24-2014 12:22pm
                      he's being defiant and tantrumming. they should want to come. It's an hour of their time and if they're successful, they get an extra special ed. teacher in the room! i loved my SEIT btw, she was great.
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              • op: wait, I thought he was under CPSE till Kindergarten. They'll take him out the day he turns 5 even if he's still in a pre-K class? 7-24-2014 12:18pm
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              • what did the teachers say to help justify it to CPSE? 7-24-2014 12:20pm
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                • that he had to keep getting pulled out of class and redirected b.c. of his defiance and tantrums, so that he (and the other kids) weren't getting a full learning experience 7-24-2014 12:22pm
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              • our school came to our CPSE meeting and our administrator was not interested. just the evals. and for what it's worth MANY ms preschools push for a SEIT for any child who is a bit...(more) 7-24-2014 1:40pm
                more work (which is why i think the CPSE admins take anything they say with a grain of salt).
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                • op: So he got an eval back in 2012, which is why he has an IEP now (for relate services). Do I now have to get a whole new eval done in order to ask for a SEIT? Both his teacher...(more) 7-24-2014 1:48pm
                  and his OT are writing letters of justification.
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                  • i'd try the letters, but an eval will get you much farther and you might as well request - 2 years is a LONG time for a preschooler. 7-24-2014 1:50pm
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    • how old is your child? 7-24-2014 12:12pm
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    • you need to get an eval - what the school thinks or you say isn't going to get you anything. 7-24-2014 1:36pm
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  17. Special Needs Feeling overwhelmed. ST wants us to work more on conversations with DC (and in a formal way, not just incorporating naturally as the day goes on). How do I do this, plus some...(more) 7-24-2014 11:58am (5 replies)
    summer academics, plus lots of physical activity, plus downtime...oh, and DC is also attending camp until 4pm every day! Anyone BTDT?
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    • age? 7-24-2014 11:59am
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    • the ST should give you homework/suggestions if she wants you to do this. 7-24-2014 12:01pm
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      • She has. I'm just having a hard time figuring out how to section off time in any given day to do this. 7-24-2014 12:37pm
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    • you don't :) - try your best, but you have an extremely busy schedule and can't be ON all the time. Therapists often do not realize this 7-24-2014 12:59pm
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  18. Special Needs Dd has epilepsy and np showed she has adhd as well. I don't know how to handle the hyperness. She's not a bad kid she just really is not in her right mind and doesn't get she...(more) 7-24-2014 11:41am (3 replies)
    can get hurt and it's very hard watching her. From a behavior standpoint what can we do?
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    • This sounds very complicated. I'm sorry. Hope you have a good child psychiatrist and md who can collaborate. 7-24-2014 1:18pm
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      • We're thinking of trying adhd meds but she's on so many seizure meds I hate to add more. 17 hr 53 min ago
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        • I can understand. Sorry. Best of luck. Maybe the add meds aren't necessary right now?...(more) 16 hr ago
          .
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  19. Special Needs So ASD 6 yo seems to be having a super emotionally, super stimmy summer. He seems more impaired to me. MS camp is telling me he's doing SOOOOO much better than last...(more) 7-24-2014 11:30am (8 replies)
    year. I'm always grateful for the progress, but I'm kind of having a bad week. And he is spacier and more obsessed with his nutty stuff. Just a vent.
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    • He may be expending his reserves more to hold it together well at camp, and then letting his hair down at home. 7-24-2014 11:33am
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      • TY for that perspective. It's just been rough going. 7-24-2014 11:42am
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      • np: That is my DS his whole life. It's exhausting to be his safe landing pad. 7-24-2014 12:15pm
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    • He might be saving this all up for when he's home. Chances are he's working hard at camp (in ways that come so easily to NT kids), and this is how he's letting it out and...(more) 7-24-2014 11:55am
      processing it all. At least, this is true for my DC. We have seen some behaviors that haven't been around in months, but at the same time, getting great reports from camp on many things including independence and following all directions and participating. I bet this is true for your DC as well.
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      • Thanks. This is why I love you guys. They're all excited that he's playing and eating and I get the aftermath of him freaking out over dark clouds and obsessing over helicpters....(more) 7-24-2014 12:14pm
        I really do appreciate the support.
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        • you know what? even if he has minor freak outs at camp, that doesn't take away from the improvement in the things you mention. Those improvements are huge. The way I look at it...(more) 7-24-2014 12:39pm
          now is if I have to take that bad stuff (which I HATE beyond belief - makes DC look more impaired too!!) so good stuff comes, I will do it. I try to remind myself of this whenever DS has one of his bad spells/inappropriate behaviors.
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        • You are very welcome. Hang in there, Mom! 16 hr 46 min ago
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    • have you tried a calming activity when he comes home? something that makes few demands (e.g. tv, doing puzzles or art etc) might help him. it helps our dc a LOT (for us it's...(more) 7-24-2014 1:53pm
      puzzles - a nice alone activity with NO social demands)
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  20. Special Needs Need to set up an EI evaluation for my 9mo DD. Dr recommended Public Health Solutions and Sunnydays? Are these good agencies or should I call others? 7-24-2014 10:29am (14 replies)
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    • YAI is great, but usually has a waiting list. We used early childhood associates. 7-24-2014 10:32am
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    • where are you? there are so many. up wee grow and metro children are pretty good 7-24-2014 10:33am
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      • Manhattan 7-24-2014 10:35am
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        • those 2 i mentioned serve manhattan. i hear little meadows is a good one too 7-24-2014 10:35am
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          • oh and forgot to add dont use designing futures they SUCK 7-24-2014 10:35am
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    • 9 mo is very young, but good to check her out 7-24-2014 10:36am
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      • Per drs orders unfortunately 7-24-2014 10:36am
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        • well that is a good dr. most peds dont notice theese things 7-24-2014 10:37am
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        • i'd say fortunately - good you have a ped who is not ignoring potential concerns. 7-24-2014 10:47am
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          • this is a good point. Should i wait to try and get YAI or just go with an agency like sunnydays? 7-24-2014 11:38am
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            • if you think the eval was not well done you can always request a new eval in either 3 or 6 mos (i cant remember) - depends on what the issues are if you think you need YAI or not....(more) 7-24-2014 1:35pm
              they are good (we used them), but dc's case was not complicated.
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              • Called YAI and they said to get eval from Theracare as they have no appts until October. Any feedback on them? 22 hr 54 min ago
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  21. Special Needs I am in pain about this such that I have a hard time writing it. We did dc's NP and scores ranged from .4%-1% for various processing test (such as coding) to 99.9% for some...(more) 7-24-2014 6:34am (24 replies)
    spelling and knowledge tests. There were some high scores in the 90s for verbal but many were extremely low or low average. My NP who I otherwise loved said things like how "sad" it was and how it is a "mourning" process for me, making me think that dc's chances in life were pretty limited. Also "things are not hopeless." Which made me think they were somewhat close to hopeless because why would she say that otherwise. This is our second NP with scores almost identical both times despite much better testing this time, so I'm not surprised, though was hoping for some higher scores with better testing instead many scores were worse. Dc can hardly produce anything is so slow, is definitely not capable of anything in arts or music, doesn't get computers, very significant social issues, what could he do.
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    • I think your NP sounds awful. I don't know enough to give you specific advice, but it sounds to me like you need to be working with someone who is just more positive than this,...(more) 7-24-2014 6:37am
      and is going to help you identify positive interventions. This person has a negative attitude.
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      • She's awesome, and I was surprised and these comments. It made me think things are even more dire than I thought. I kept asking her what kinds of jobs someone with that profile...(more) 7-24-2014 6:39am
        could get and the only answer she had was academics, which given dc's issues with writing and speaking I don't think is realistic.
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        • She may be awesome but she doesn't seem helpful. Has she laid out a program you can give the school to remediate as much as possible? 7-24-2014 9:10am
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    • I know nothing about kids with special needs or test scores but I do know that we have no idea what is in store for us or what type of happiness or life a person has. And as child...(more) 7-24-2014 6:39am
      can surprise you - good luck
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      • Thanks. I feel like life is so super hard at least mine has been and I don't have those issues (maybe I have different ones) and I am terrified for him. I mean wow .4%? 1%? 3%...(more) 7-24-2014 6:42am
        These are some low scores and many others 37%, 50%?
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        • How old is your child? 7-24-2014 6:43am
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          • 13 7-24-2014 6:44am
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            • That is a tough age for all children. Chin up. Don't listen to that negativity 7-24-2014 6:50am
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    • do not let a score determine your expectations for what your child can do. Please dont. There are so many people who have been successful who would score low or aver on an iq...(more) 7-24-2014 6:53am
      test. Expose the child to a lot of different things.
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    • Did she recommend a constructive school/therapy plan? What was the dx? And don't panic--my ds scored in the lowest 1% for fine motor, and he's since mastered writing his name by...(more) 7-24-2014 7:03am
      age 5. They can surprise you.
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      • She didn't have specific ideas. I said I wanted a kind environment where dc could still be exposed to good learning (he spends most of his time reading on the computer for...(more) 7-24-2014 7:09am
        knowledge, that's what he likes) and she said maybe a small MS private, which we couldn't afford.
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    • Are you still on? I do ed testing for a living? What specific tests and subtests were the low scores on? 7-24-2014 7:11am
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      • What are his skills like? What setting is he in ? 7-24-2014 7:13am
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        • sn school, I don't have the report yet but she showed it to us in office, the .4% was processing and the 1% I don't remember, will have report next week. 7-24-2014 7:18am
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          • When you get the report I can help talk it through with you if you like. I'm on here quite a bit :) 7-24-2014 7:21am
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          • The processing speed scores arent as important as the other cognitive and academic scores. I agree with post above - the NP does not sound great in how this was approached. I...(more) 7-24-2014 9:25am
            would speak with his school and therapists that know him and maybe have a consultation with someone else to review this.
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            • If it takes him hours to produce a paragraph, that seems like a pretty big impediment in life. At some point and in most jobs you have to produce. 7-24-2014 10:15am
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              • np: I agree that your neuropscyh didn't handle you well at all and that you should be careful not to let a score be so deterministic. These things are malleable, and people...(more) 7-24-2014 10:34am
                develop all sorts of compensatory strategies. My brother is a slow processor but still managed to graduate from Johns Hopkins with a 4.0 in biomedical engineering and went on to become a doctor.
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                • Also, I really understand your pain. It's awful having those meetings and reading the report. Heartbreaking. 7-24-2014 10:42am
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                • Thank you! Was his slowness at .4%? :-) I appreciate your kind words. 7-24-2014 11:27am
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                  • My brother? I really don't know. We grew up in the dark ages in wich our mother didn't pursue the deatils of his diabi 7-24-2014 1:10pm
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                    • details of his diabilities bc she was afriad it wou 7-24-2014 1:10pm
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                      • afraid it would be on his "record.". But for sure he had processing issues, as does my dc. I refuse to 7-24-2014 1:12pm
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                        • let it be a life sentence. (typing on tablet -- sorry!) 7-24-2014 1:13pm
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  22. Special Needs Is there any private pay SN preschool commutable to Manhattan or in Westchester? Moderate functioning behaviorally and language-wise, cognitive above average. We''ll be aged out...(more) 7-23-2014 10:05pm (13 replies)
    of CPSE (have lawyer and a Plan A, but having second thoughts and looking for plan B.)
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    • Maybe Riverdale Nursery School and Family Center...(more) 7-23-2014 10:06pm
      http://rnsfc.org/
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      • Thanks! 7-23-2014 10:16pm
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        • I see that the website doesn't seem to talk about the SN aspect so I would call them. 7-23-2014 10:23pm
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          • Gaynor ECC-great program. My child started last year at 6 but there is sn preschool. 7-23-2014 10:40pm
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            • be very careful if your child has behavioral issues. They are not tolerant of them and have asked a few parents to obtain SEITs at their own expense 7-24-2014 8:32am
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              • op: I've heard great things about Gaynor, but I think we're too immature and not HF enough. We definitely have a behavioral aspect, although it doesn't come out in school, it...(more) 7-24-2014 1:36pm
                does come out in unfamiliar situations, such as school playdates . . .
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                • CPELC sometimes has private pay spots in their integrated classroom. 22 hr 59 min ago
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                • It is a fantastic school, but if behavior is an issue, it's probably not for you 18 hr 49 min ago
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    • curious - what is your plan A? Why are you looking for an extra year of preschool? I ask because we may be looking for similar next year. 7-24-2014 8:45am
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      • Yes, that's the plan A. 7-24-2014 1:35pm
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    • YAI Gramercy could have a private pay spot, I would ask. 7-24-2014 1:41pm
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      • I am poster that suggested Gaynor. There were a few kids with regulation issues in my child's class. Two of the kids are staying and one child went to another school. Gaynor does...(more) 18 hr 48 min ago
        not accommodate regulation issues and I think as kids progress--less and less in elementary school. That being said, there are some difficult behaviors that seem to be tolerated but that may not always be the case.
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        • po--gaynor is 1 to 1 interview with child and very professional--there is not a playdate as in now go and communicate with total strangers kiddos. 18 hr 27 min ago
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  23. Special Needs Love the ritalin (long-acting, plus afternoon supplement). hate the rebound. dd turns into a monster at 8PM. 7-23-2014 9:49pm (4 replies)
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    • That worked really well for my ds while in school, but wore off around 2pm. I didn't want to give him a bump bc he isn't a good sleeper as it is and I know that would really make...(more) 7-23-2014 9:53pm
      him worse. We got 8:45-2pm, so I think that's pretty darn good.
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      • i get that. but my dd is so physically hyper and defiant when off the meds and especially when rebounding. having relatively calm afternoons together is really good for our...(more) 7-23-2014 9:56pm
        relationship. did your ds have a rebound effect? and did he go off the meds later?
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        • He got pretty emotional in the beginning, but it seemed to level out a lot. If it's good for your relationship, I don't blame you for wanting to keep her on it. 7-23-2014 9:59pm
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          • i feel guilty that i can't just "love her the way she is," but it is what it is, i guess. she has behaviors and attitudes/impulses that make it impossible to have a reasonable...(more) 7-23-2014 10:02pm
            interaction. she won't let me touch her (but might bump into me painfully), etc.
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  24. Special Needs Is there a percentage of kids with autism who go on to develop speech? What about if apraxia is involved? 7-23-2014 8:32pm (7 replies)
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    • I have a PDD boy with Apraxia. Speech is coming but very, very slowly and he's 5. 7-23-2014 8:37pm
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      • What do you mean by slow? I have 2 yo twins both non verbal and severe apraxia. 7-23-2014 8:39pm
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        • np: Another mom of global delay/dyspraxic kid aged 5 here. I'd say sentences started coming in the past year, and he's only now relatively easy for others to understand in terms...(more) 7-24-2014 7:07am
          of his articulation.
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        • It's just taking a long time and progress is slow. We've had ST 5 times a week for 3 years now painstakingly working on each individual letter/sound and he is only just starting...(more) 7-24-2014 12:08pm
          to make sense to other people. He is a twin too. The other twin has the apraxia dx too but seems to be making slightly quicker progress. The Dev ped said 6-7 years old is about average for kids with Apraxia to start being able to be understood although they may still having lingering speech impediments for longer. This seems to be the case as the other twin's speech is really coming now but he still can't say 'L' or CH sounds.
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    • - no subject -...(more) 7-23-2014 9:59pm
    • Not all kids with ASD are speech impaired to begin with, other than pragmatics. So yes, many speak. Kids who are dyspraxic/apraxic usually do too if htey get good ST...(more) 7-24-2014 7:06am
      intervention. My ds' CPSE class was mixed ASD/apraxia, since they all benefitted from the same language-rich environment. The staff got ALL of them talking by pre-K graduation, and many were almost totally nonverbal when starting preschool.
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    • I have a friend with a asd child who was non-verbal when he started Kindergaten. Cut to 2 years later and you can't stop the kid from talking! He still has articulation and...(more) 18 hr 47 min ago
      pragmatic issues, but he is worlds away from where he started.
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  25. Special Needs Can an Aspie kid go to a regular kindergarten? Small class size 7-23-2014 4:55pm (37 replies)
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    • shaw 7-23-2014 4:55pm
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    • Of course. Many aspies aren't even diagnosed yet at that age. (Mine wasn't until 2nd grade. He's still in "regular" school, 4th grade.) 7-23-2014 4:56pm
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      • ok thanks 7-23-2014 4:56pm
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        • Don't be panicked by the YBM folks, who seem to think that every kid with an SN needs to go to a specialized private school and sue for tuition. There are kids who really need...(more) 7-23-2014 4:58pm
          that, but honestly most SN kids are accommodated in public school.
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          • Do you live in NYC? 7-23-2014 10:31pm
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            • Yes. Queens. 7-24-2014 7:08am
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              • Can you tell me where you dc goes to school? Is he/she in a 6:1:1, 12:1:1 or ICT class, and how is it going? 7-24-2014 9:10am
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                • He's in a District G&T. This past school year went very well, fingers crossed for a good teacher next year. 7-24-2014 10:58am
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                  • Does he have ASD? 7-24-2014 11:16am
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                    • He has asperger's, which the new diagnostic manual renames mild ASD. 7-24-2014 11:34am
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          • not in nyc. 7-24-2014 10:58am
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            • There are a tiny number of seats for Aspie/HFA in specialized schools. I assure you, most go to regular public schools with IEP's. There are at least two in my son's class at...(more) 7-24-2014 1:10pm
              present.
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          • That may be true for a child with Aspergers. But a child with pdd-nos or classic autism in most cases would not be served well in a NYC public school. BTDT It was a disaster and...(more) 7-24-2014 1:15pm
            he regressed.
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            • Original post is specifically about Asperger's. 7-24-2014 1:32pm
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            • many of those kids ('classic' autism) are acocmodated via D75 which has MANY 12:1:2 type classes 23 hr 51 min ago
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              • DF's daughter with classic autism has progressed from D75 6:1 class through several levels to ICT class by middle school. All these options exist, but it can be difficult to...(more) 22 hr 46 min ago
                navigate the system to get a good placement for your child.
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        • Do make sure to get an appropriate IEP in place. If you're not sure what's appropriate or how to do that, come see us on the SN board. 7-23-2014 5:00pm
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          • You'll want some sort of social skills support, and many need OT or ST, depending on how they present. 7-23-2014 5:05pm
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      • if parents are payingn attention and aren't in denial, a verbal ASD child can be diagnosed much earlier than that. 7-24-2014 10:58am
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        • Signs were attributed to a) vision problems (no eye contact expected) and b) being youngest in grade for a while. 7-24-2014 10:59am
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          • This post has been disliked 3 times. showand the parent bought this? no wonder this parent is so happy with the public system for an apie child. clearly they have low expectations. 7-24-2014 11:47am
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            • Well, that's just obnoxious. FWIW, he had a full CPSE eval at 3 that found nothing but mild OT issues. If you're a first time parent, and your ped, the CPSE eval team and his...(more) 7-24-2014 1:06pm
              teacher are all telling you he's just immature and needs time, and can't make proper eye contact because of severe amblyopia, why would you assume ASD?
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              • How is achieving full integration into ms school "low expectations"? 7-24-2014 1:08pm
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        • this post is kind of insulting. there's no need to put more blame on parents. in borderline cases it can be very difficult to diagnose early, especially if there are other issues. 7-24-2014 1:39pm
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          • it was, and I'm sorry. I don't like the tone of above post, which is that YBM panicks parents. this poster, who posts often, seems to think that if you pursue a sn private, you re...(more) 23 hr 55 min ago
            just lazy or something--I'm not exactly sure of what the rationale is. most spectrum kids don't do so well in public schools in nyc. there are big classes and it's hard on those kids.
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            • I think you're conflating a bunch of posters, the general tenor of which is to remind people that SN are not the be-all and end-all for everyone, and only available to a small...(more) 22 hr 49 min ago
              percentage of SN kids such that other things may need to be considered.
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              • Sorry, first phrase was supposed ot be "SN schools", not just SN. 22 hr 47 min ago
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              • I"m not conflating many posters. it's the same person, always trashes sn private schools and the parents who send kids there, always talks up how amazing the DOE is for her child,...(more) 22 hr 20 min ago
                who was diagnosed very late. and now she has another child, recently dx and he is going into public. this poster lives in queens. it's the same one, the same "magician" who has magically integrated her kids, although I'm dubious about that claim.
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                • ^^and I'm sure I'm just grouchily responding to her older posts. It's not a common experience to have a kid with ASD do well in a public setting. I wish it was the norm but it's...(more) 22 hr 10 min ago
                  not, and choosing a different setting for those kids doesn't make a parent lazy or overly anxious. it just makes that parent pretty lucky for getting a spot, super lucky to get funding or just pay and it's a huge help for the kid in question.
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                  • np: I wouldn't have believed it but as a public school parent, I have seen dcs with Aspergers or HFA do very well. I don't know of the poster that you are referring to but I can...(more) 16 hr 21 min ago
                    only say that I just see our side, which has been public school and I have witnessed it work for some.
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                • It sounds like the poster you have issues with is talking about a very high-functioning child. I don't think anybody has ever said that there aren't kids who need SN schools....(more) 4 hr 35 min ago
                  You're projecting
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    • In nyc many families look for alternative arrangements because it's difficult to find small class sizes unless you pay for private...(more) 7-23-2014 6:06pm
      My son wasn't diagnosed until 3rd grade and was in integrated mainstream classes for k-3. In 4th grade we moved to a special needs private school.
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      • np: Diagnosis in 2nd grade here. We looked at SN schools/ASD Nest, couldn't get a spot. So our public provided a para, OT, and social skills counseling. A year and a half...(more) 7-24-2014 7:10am
        later, it's still working well and we're no longer looking to apply out.
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    • My aspie was dx'd at 2.5 and was appropriately and successfully ms'd from k with lots of supports and services. His class size was 21 in k and 21-24 in 1-3 grades. 7-23-2014 8:03pm
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    • mine did. still in regular class but in second grade it is starting to be an issue 22 hr 46 min ago
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