Special Needs

  1. Special Needs I'm anti-meds. However I may be hitting a wall with PDD-NOS / NVLD dc who is nine. What are the mildest meds that can help with rages? 5 hr 29 min ago (15 replies)
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    • ^ setting up a consult with psychiatrist but want to do research on my own 5 hr 28 min ago
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    • possibly anti depressants. as someone who clearly needed them my whole life, i will say that i think that had i been on them i could have avoided some terrible things in my life....(more) 5 hr 27 min ago
      consider it. they don't work for everyone but they could turn the volume down.
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    • What is mild for one may not be for another. A low dose of abilify works well for my kid who suffers rages as a result of a personality disorder and PTSD. 5 hr 27 min ago
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    • Honestly, the neurology for ASD is very different from ADHD and many times, meds are either ineffective or have the opposite effect. Behavioral therapy is generally a much better...(more) 5 hr 26 min ago
      way to go. All of that said, see a doctor who specializes in ASD
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      • My dcs have had good experiences with things like Risperdal and Intuniv. 5 hr 20 min ago
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      • This not true. Many ASD kids use SSRIs with success. Often the rage is actually anxiety 3 hr 33 min ago
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    • I was severely anti-meds until someone put it to me like this....If your kid had diabetes would you even question medication? Your brain is an organ just like your kidney's and...(more) 5 hr 25 min ago
      liver. We have a stigma against helping the brain when we really shouldn't.
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    • See below...(more) 5 hr 20 min ago
    • OP I wish I could give ds the equivalent of a glass of wine. It's nothing or BOOM antipsychotic drug. 4 hr 46 min ago
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      • They are not "BOOM" in low doses. And alcoholic beverages ARE sedative drugs, just ones we're conditioned to use socially. 3 hr 57 min ago
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      • low dosing in kids is not boom! And they can be life changing. 3 hr 32 min ago
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      • Is the word "antipsychotic" that scares you? (It's definitely a scary word.) 3 hr 27 min ago
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        • But the uses for kids are mostly off-label. It doesn't mean your kid is psychotic. 1 hr 52 min ago
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          • ITA, that's why I asked, because it is a frightening word but the reality is very different. 1 hr 36 min ago
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  2. Special Needs What SN school takes kids with aggressive behaviors? 6 hr 32 min ago (7 replies)
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    • jail 6 hr 30 min ago
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      • ^^im sorry, bad joke. Not cool of me. 6 hr 29 min ago
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        • np i want to dislike and like this all at once. love that you apologized. 5 hr 44 min ago
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    • Please? 6 hr 20 min ago
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    • andrus 6 hr 4 min ago
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    • Reece 5 hr 49 min ago
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  3. Special Needs Can someone who has been through divorce explain the steps?...(more) 7 hr 29 min ago (37 replies)
    I do not want to get divorced but will not contest it if DH files, which I expect him to. I make 80k a year and we live in Manhattan. I assume that we sell the family apartment. I have no idea how to calculate what I put into the mortgage, I didn't put anything into the substantial down payment. I just want the two kids (one SN) and enough to rent a 1 bedroom in our neighborhood.
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    • How much does he make? 7 hr 28 min ago
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      • OP I 7 hr 27 min ago
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        • Op I'm not entirely sure. I think between 200-250k. 7 hr 26 min ago
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    • ^ I don't want any support, I just want the kids to have shelter, food, clothes. 7 hr 27 min ago
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      • 80k will be tough- you might want to think.it through 7 hr 26 min ago
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      • np: don't be shortsighted. Life is long. You will need to retire someday. If he earns significantly more, and the life plan has always been for you to do more childcare while he...(more) 7 hr 25 min ago
        earns, demand that you receive a big chunk of 401k from him, and fight to get the money needed to raise the kids. You don't want to wuss out and make it "easy" and then regret later when dh is living it up, and you are scraping by looking at elder years where you are living in poverty.
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        • Out autistic son bombed my life. I have a STEM Ph.D. and was a high flyer till he was about 3. I have done 90% of the childcare and kept working but was quickly mommy tracked. DH...(more) 7 hr 18 min ago
          stayed on the high flyer track and the trajectory will continue as he is extremely ambitious and successful. I've resigned to the fact that I am alive to try to give our autistic son a fighting chance in life before I croak.
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          • And I understand your feelings of desperation, but you can't be shortsighted here. You MUST look out for your own best interests. 7 hr 16 min ago
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            • I guess this is why people get lawyers. I just give up. We got a bad roll of the dice and my life gets blown up. 7 hr 13 min ago
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              • I know that having a SN child is stressful, but you need to not blame him for this. 7 hr 12 min ago
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                • I've done EVERYTHING. I've thrown my life and body over this kid to limit the shrapnel from wounding DH and our other (NT) child....(more) 7 hr 4 min ago
                  I drag myself to work, I manage all the therapies, 6+ therapists, I get the calls from school, I sweat the homework, I sit on the edge of the bench at the playground ready to leap into a situation before it boils over. DH has the kind of job where he might be away evenings and weekends for weeks at a time, or traveling for weeks. Of course he can't wrangle the kids like I can. But when things go wrong (which they frequently do) he has full-on autistic meltdowns. This morning I was taking a conference call from home when the commotion upstairs boiled over. I muted and went up and found DH kicking a door repeatedly while children were running around screaming refusing to go to school. I managed to get the NT one calm enough to comply but then DH blames me for got knows what I did wrong. I took the ASD one in late. I just don't know what to do anymore.
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                  • I'm presuming dh isn't open to therapy for himsel? 7 hr 1 min ago
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                    • He would do marital therapy 6 hr 47 min ago
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        • np agree, you have to be patient and hold your ground. It isn't about screwing anyone, it is bout compensation for the opportunity cost of the lost career. 7 hr 2 min ago
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    • Every divorce is different. If you and DH can agree on what is best for the kids, it will help. Like--if you think there would be great value in the children being able to remain...(more) 7 hr 27 min ago
      in the current apartment, prioritize that and work out an agreement that keeps you & the kids there, and dh can move out (I'm assuming you have a more active caregiving role?).
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      • I don't think we can afford to keep us in the apartment if we need to support two apartments. 7 hr 26 min ago
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        • Moving is traumatic and do you own the apartment? 7 hr 25 min ago
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        • It may be possible. Give it some serious thought. Your kids need as much stability as possible. 7 hr 24 min ago
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          • ^having parents divorce is a big deal, especially if their perception has always been that you and dh get along. 7 hr 23 min ago
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            • I actually am OK with staying in a dead marriage for the sake of finances and stability for the kids. When divorce is threatened they sob and cling to legs. 7 hr 17 min ago
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              • what? who the heck is threatening divorce? 7 hr 16 min ago
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                • We both do in our worst blow-out fight moments. It is awful. And over things like insisting a reluctant kid goes to a baseball game. 7 hr 14 min ago
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        • np try to think outside the box. there are lots of ways to do this. what if instead of another family sized apartment you rented a small studio and took turns going there when you...(more) 7 hr 3 min ago
          don't have the kids?
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          • This makes great sense. YES. 7 hr 1 min ago
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            • it is called "nesting " and I did it with my ex for a while. The kids stay put and hte parents move in and out. and it was CHEAPER than the alternative. 7 hr ago
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              • This only works until a certain point then things like dating interfere or just moving on. In my case I couldn't nest, since the scent of exh would put me in a tailspin. 6 hr 10 min ago
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      • Yes. I agree 100% 7 hr 25 min ago
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    • he can divorce you so you are wise not to make it a protracted and costly event. Typically you split any assets more or less 50/50 and hte higher earner will pay the lower earner...(more) 7 hr 4 min ago
      some child support and alimony possibly depending on the overall finances. You have to figure out a budget for your life on your own: rent, medical, half the kid's expenses etc. There is no one way to do it, but the goal generally is to not have anyone suffer a change in lifestyle as much as possible
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      • THanks - OK. This is helpful. 7 hr 3 min ago
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        • what else can I help with? btdt, creatively and succesfully. (also a SN kid btw, it really takes a toll on a marriage) 7 hr 1 min ago
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          • ^^ first of all, find out what he makes. don't you see the tax returns? make sure you konw where all the money is, every account. 7 hr 1 min ago
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    • The ARC Center for Future Planning recently did a webinar on divorce with kids with I/DD - it is also important to remember you might need care support much longer for a SN kid...(more) 6 hr 49 min ago
    • You are entitled to 50% of marital assests even if you did not contribute the same to the down payment as long as the property was purchased as a married couple. 6 hr 32 min ago
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  4. Special Needs Anyone do any brain training type stuff for Inattentive/slow processing kid? PACE, Cogmed, LearningRx, etc? Thoughts? 9 hr 9 min ago (0 replies)
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  5. Special Needs Sleepaway camp options for quirky (girl) campers with IEP but no formal dx 9 hr 25 min ago (11 replies)
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    • do you think she needs extra support? 9 hr 24 min ago
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      • yes. to clarify i will tour this summer for next year when she's 9 6 hr 36 min ago
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    • How much social help does she need? 9 hr 21 min ago
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      • trouble navigating social situations but not aggressive 6 hr 35 min ago
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        • Look at Akeela to see if it feels like too much. It is very much geared at kids who have trouble navigating social situations. 5 hr 48 min ago
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    • Onas but I'm sure they are full 9 hr 19 min ago
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    • How do you get an IEP w/ no formal diagnosis? Our school district will barely give one with a very serious diagnosis 6 hr 31 min ago
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      • nyc? 6 hr 27 min ago
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      • They are often given based on functioning level/percentage of delay in an area, irrespective of whether or not there is a dx or what the dx is. 5 hr 11 min ago
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    • Summit Camp 5 hr 12 min ago
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    • Frost Valley Y (MAC program through YAI-- no diagnosis required) 2 hr 17 min ago
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  6. Special Needs Are services for middle schooler/high school with high-functioning autism & ADHD better in PA or MD? 10 hr 14 min ago (2 replies)
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    • IDK about MD but my cousin has lived in PA for about 10 years. She has a 20yo son with autism. She told me a few years back PA has the best SN services in the country, and her son...(more) 10 hr 12 min ago
      has had an immense amount of help.
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  7. Special Needs What are your tips for making ADHD kids more independent? I'm thinking middle school age and older. Thank you 10 hr 53 min ago (30 replies)
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    • I have provided a lot of supports and routines. 10 hr 52 min ago
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      • Any specific tips for getting kids to cook more? Make their own school lunch? Make their own breakfast? 10 hr 51 min ago
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        • Just don't do it for them 10 hr 50 min ago
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          • I've thought about this. But because of the medication they take, I really worry that they won't eat at all. 10 hr 50 min ago
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            • We all eat breakfast kind of together. Then I know she skips lunch because of it some days or just has something like a Snapple which isn't great but she then seems to eat her...(more) 10 hr 47 min ago
              bagged lunch on the way home or as soon as she walks in the door she's starving
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        • I started small. One meal, on a weekend. 10 hr 50 min ago
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        • I started doing it together, and then fading out my role gradually. 10 hr 38 min ago
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      • THIS! explicit schedules, lists, timers, to-dos. Lots of external organizers. 10 hr 48 min ago
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    • My biggest problem is that my ds just cannot wake up on his own. He's 16. And I know he has time, but it's a basic skill. He's good about regulating homework, he does laundry,...(more) 10 hr 51 min ago
      etc. But the waking up makes me CRAZY.
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      • this may be more of a teen issue than an ADHD issue 10 hr 50 min ago
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        • yes, but I think it's worse with him. He really is DEEP asleep and just doesn't wake up. 10 hr 48 min ago
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          • Does he require a lot of sleep? My son does… And it's a real challenge. He has to be out by 6 AM, which means he really needs to be asleep at nine. Very impractical....(more) 10 hr 47 min ago
            But we do our best to enforce that. He's only 13 though.
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            • He will sleep 9-14 hours if he isn't roused. So, yes. And there is no way to fit that into a regular day. 10 hr 46 min ago
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            • How do you get him up? What do your mornings look like? Ours involve a lot of yelling on his part, I try to stay calm but it's not easy 10 hr 39 min ago
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          • Np, my 13 year old is this way and our mornings are miserable, every weekday 10 hr 43 min ago
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      • This post has been disliked 3 times. showThis has nothing to do with his adhd and everything to do with your parenting 10 hr 49 min ago
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        • He's always had sleep issues, so...I don't think so. 10 hr 49 min ago
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        • I hope you're gone, but this is the SN board, please do t make these comments here. 10 hr 41 min ago
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      • I was an NT teen who routinely slept until 12pm whenever I possibly could. My parents used to stand at the bottom of the stairs and say teasing things in the most annoying way...(more) 10 hr 47 min ago
        possible to get me to get up! I remember once going on an open house to a place I was looking at, it was a Sunday at about 2pm and the two teenage girls of the house were STILL IN BED and didn't get up - we went through their room while they were lying in bed and the owner of the house said "I tried to get them to get up, but they wouldn't."
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      • my dd is 10 with adhd and getting up is always a challenge with her too. Has been for yeras. 10 hr 45 min ago
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        • or: yes. My ds used to have a hell of a time falling asleep. It used to take him HOURS (like. 3-4) to settle down up until he was about 5 or 6. And then he always slept heavily...(more) 10 hr 44 min ago
          for 12 hours. And as a teen, sleeping for 12 hours just isn't happening.
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          • my dd has been on melatonin at night since she was 2.5. 10 hr 39 min ago
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    • This is very helpful:...(more) 10 hr 51 min ago
    • Just make them do it. They rise to the occasion if you give them the lay of the land and confidence that you trust them. 10 hr 51 min ago
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    • my 11yo ds is really getting good at being independent. We were just on vacation and after breakfast at the hotel he would ask to go back to the room while we finished up, we...(more) 10 hr 46 min ago
      allowed him to od that. He stays home alone sometimes, we let him take part of the grocery list and go get the items at the store. At one of the museums we were at he wanted to go see an exhbit, we were in the next room, we let him go.
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      • ^^^we have worked up to this, and he has done great. The organziation part is MUCH slower 10 hr 45 min ago
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    • When you find out let me know! 10 hr 34 min ago
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    • dc is almost 18 and is very independent. Set reasonable expectations and push where necessary 7 hr 32 min ago
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    • let them fail at small things, but have their back for the big ones. I used school counselors extensively and made phone calls to give them a heads up so when my ds came in and...(more) 7 hr 31 min ago
      self advocated they had the whole story and the experience was a successful one.
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  8. Special Needs My two kids have ADHD and my dh does too. I have no doubt my family life and my marriage would be a lot easier if that weren't the case. It is so damn hard. 10 hr 57 min ago (8 replies)
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    • If you don't have this already--join CHADD and get their guide to ADHD. It's the only publication I've seen that addresses some of the adult issues--sexuality, marriage, family. I...(more) 10 hr 55 min ago
      found it extremely helpful.
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      • I did a Chaad workshop years ago but only about kids. That's a good point about adult ADHD. I am going out of my mind. 10 hr 55 min ago
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        • Join for a year just to get the guide. It's seriously the best. I actually need to give to my teen DS to read so he can understand what may be coming down the pike for him in...(more) 10 hr 53 min ago
          relationships.
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      • what does it say about sexuality ? 10 hr 49 min ago
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        • I forget the specifics of it, but it was about impulsivity/high desire levels/energy and how that impacts your partnership. People with ADHD can be extremely sexually demanding. 10 hr 47 min ago
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    • My dh struggles too...in addition to our dd. check out the site adhdmarriage. It is run by a social worker (Melissa Orlov) who works with Dr. Hallowell. She has some good...(more) 10 hr 49 min ago
      resources and an email list you can sign up for to get emails every few weeks. Not earth shattering info, but can make you feel like you are not the only one.
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  9. Special Needs Hi wonderful and supportive ladies :) Can someone please recommend a mainstream day camp outside of Manhattan in any direction within 1 to 1.5 hours that we could rent near for...(more) 11 hr 5 min ago (6 replies)
    summer but where camp is supportive of a child with sensory processing and some minor social skills issues. 6 year old boy
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    • I have friends who have sent their SN kids to Gate Hill and Blue Rill. Also, while it is an SN camp, check out Our Victory as well. 11 hr 4 min ago
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      • Anything in CT 8 hr 25 min ago
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    • Central Queens Y. They run several camps, and they have a program that provides shadows when necessary (not advertised--you have to ask the camp director). 10 hr 42 min ago
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    • Look @ Camp Twelve Trails. Mainstream Y camp with supports. Y of WaHi/Inwood has a tremendous SN program and they are involved in this camp. 8 hr 9 min ago
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    • Not sure if you are specifically looking to leave NYC for this, but Poly Prep in South Brooklyn (Bay Ridge) has a great day camp that has a good reputation with kids with minor...(more) 6 hr 59 min ago
      SNs. And they bus from Manhattan, but I'm not sure exactly from where.
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    • op: THANKS! ANything in CT fairfield county? 3 hr 22 min ago
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  10. Special Needs HFA ds is triggering HFA DH into mutual dysregulation and meltdowns. Do I just divorce now?...(more) 12 hr 10 min ago (1 reply)
    Since HFA ds (8) was about 4, his issues (school, social interactions with peers) have consumed my life. I still work but I left the high flyer track. DH kept on the high flyer track and so only dips in and out of parenting anyway. When he dips in it generally is a disaster. Our marriage has been reduced to co-parenting(ish). We have HUGE blow-out fights in front of the kids in which divorce is threatened (to the horror if sobbing children - the other is NT). Basically a nightmare. How do I fix this?
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    • Therapy for all asap. Family therapy and indivifual 12 hr 9 min ago
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  11. Special Needs Have done questions with short acting Intuniv, anyone's dc take this? 19 hr 53 min ago (2 replies)
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  12. Special Needs If you need to increase a dose of ritalin ER, but are only 2 weeks into the prescription, can they issue another script for the higher dose? 21 hr 45 min ago (7 replies)
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    • Yes 21 hr 45 min ago
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      • so you just start stockpiling old meds? I was worried about restrictions 21 hr 44 min ago
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        • We have vyvanse in 3 doses. 21 hr 43 min ago
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    • Yes 21 hr 41 min ago
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    • That's how we do it with our meds (Zoloft). When the psychiatrist writes an updated Rx, it goes to the pharmacy and I don't have to wait the 30 days, I just go get it. 21 hr 41 min ago
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  13. Special Needs Parent Training in NYC for ADHD or mild autistic kid...(more) 23 hr 6 min ago (7 replies)
    We were told to do Parent Child Interaction Therapy a while ago but could not find any credentialed therapist in NYC who takes any type of insurance. The closest was in White Plains (Center for Autism and the Developing Brain). Our 6 year old is still having outbursts/meltdowns, and is SN school, social skills classes etc. but these meltdowns are pretty unpredictable and draining. Anyone have suggestions for parent training classes--not PCIT necessarily but something that can help us improve our ability to help her with improving her behaviors? She was diagnosed at around age 4 and didn't get any ABA. She's got HFA, ADHD and Sensory Processing issues plus anxiety. But often a sweet, smart kid. The meltdowns (hitting/throwing, sometimes even biting herself) are a lot better than they were but I still think we could be doing something better to help her.
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    • Also, behavior therapist for 6 year old would be good....(more) 23 hr 4 min ago
      Money's an issue, so if anyone takes insurance (United Healthcare) that would be helpful
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    • CADB is in White PLains but has therapists that will come to your home in Manhattan. We did that with them and have been very happy. We also have UHC and have gotten it covered as...(more) 22 hr 55 min ago
      speech therapy (since the provider is a speech therapist).
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    • First of all. Hugs. Fellow meltdown prone HFA mom here and age 4 was our toughest year. NYU's Child Study Center has a PCIT service and takes UHC (which is what we have). 22 hr 45 min ago
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      • Thanks. Now the hard part-- getting DH to do it... 22 hr 17 min ago
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        • Wait, I thought NYU Child Study Center doesn't take insurance?...(more) 21 hr 50 min ago
          Also, I tried CADB and they said they no longer send therapists to your home.
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          • We have UHC and they take it. 12 hr 17 min ago
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    • I think you should consider meds. BTDT and only meds helped. 21 hr 22 min ago
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  14. Special Needs If your dc is on no stimulant I really need advice pls tia 23 hr 17 min ago (1 reply)
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    • on NO stimulant? 23 hr 11 min ago
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  15. Special Needs Social skills training for mildly spectrum with high IQ. Where do I being? Book? Class? Camp? I'm all ears. 8yo. 4-27-2016 7:47pm (5 replies)
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    • I sent my ds to Camp Sequoia in Philly. It was AMAZING. 4-27-2016 7:48pm
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      • googling... 4-27-2016 7:50pm
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        • Oh. Overnight camp would never work. 23 hr 56 min ago
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          • Buddy Club by Becca Yure; or Boost Program at JCC...(more) 23 hr 13 min ago
            Supposedly Social City is good too.
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            • Becca Yure runs a social skills group? Is it good? She was my ds's ABA therapist years ago and I was not impressed at all. 21 hr 20 min ago
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  16. Special Needs How well do your kids eat in terms of veggies, etc? 4-27-2016 6:37pm (13 replies)
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    • Peas, corn, broccoli and spinach for ds. Not a single one for ds 4-27-2016 6:38pm
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    • dd eats veggies and really likes most of them. ds won't eat any and really never has. both are 13yo. i don't sweat it, i barely ate veggies growing up and i eat most now 4-27-2016 6:39pm
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      • sn kids? 4-27-2016 6:39pm
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        • no, ds ate some as a toddler but then stopped and i don't force it. 4-27-2016 6:40pm
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          • sorry, i didn't realize it was sn board. 4-27-2016 6:41pm
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            • yes, that's why I was asking. i don't think when he grows up he will eat well. 4-27-2016 6:41pm
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          • so ds is sn? 4-27-2016 6:41pm
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    • Awfully. Mine both have sensory issues to varying degrees, and one has significant oral motor problems on top that make many natural food textures difficult for him. I resort to...(more) 4-27-2016 6:51pm
      juices and smoothies a lot to get key nutrients into them, and they will at least eat whole grains for the fiber.
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    • My kids do. It's my DH that doens't 4-27-2016 6:53pm
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    • Pretty well now, this was the object of a LOT of ABA when dc was younger 4-27-2016 7:02pm
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    • I'd describe SN ds' relationship with vegetables to be one of tolerance. He does not like them but will eat at least some to get more of preferred items (not just dessert, but...(more) 22 hr 54 min ago
      meat, starch or fruit)
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    • work in progress. we are not giving up but it is slow...cannot give a side of veggies but mixed in pasta and cut up into very small pieces he will eat it 21 hr 41 min ago
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      • also we do veg juices at home 21 hr 41 min ago
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  17. Special Needs Need to sign DS therapist release for language-based disability school application. Do I sign a full release? If limited, what is the wording? 4-27-2016 5:04pm (1 reply)
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    • Just list the names who are relevant 4-27-2016 5:11pm
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  18. Special Needs Just need to vent. My son went on interview for private unfunded school. They didn't look over any paperwork before. They were so rude. Hand gestures, whispering and sometimes...(more) 4-27-2016 3:59pm (5 replies)
    just talking out loud right in front of us. As if we weren't even there. So annoying wanted to say something but if I did knew they wouldn't ask my kid to come back.
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    • (((hugs))) 4-27-2016 4:59pm
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    • that's terrible. where was this?? 4-27-2016 5:39pm
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    • That's awful. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. 4-27-2016 6:46pm
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    • thanks. feel better. private school in nyc. 7 hr 45 min ago
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      • Hugs, hope they do call you back and are nicer then!! 7 hr 43 min ago
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  19. Special Needs Is there anyone comparable to David Salsberg who can get good placements 4-27-2016 1:35pm (29 replies)
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    • none of the neuropsychs, including David Salsberg "gets you" the placements. They recommend appropriate schools based on the testing. 4-27-2016 2:08pm
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      • np - i wish this were true, but those reports are so often edited per parent request to fit (or not fit) a certain profile that op's question is not unreasonable. 4-27-2016 3:06pm
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        • nnp: A report written from a certain angle may be able to get a kid an interview, but once the school meets the child, if they're not a fit, no report can make them a fit. 4-27-2016 3:08pm
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          • Getting a foot in the door is huge though. And schools only see so much in an interview, esp with a younger child. 4-27-2016 3:10pm
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            • Then I guess the way to ask OP's question is "who can write a good report who's a neuropsych that the schools trust to represent potential candidates well so they will give them...(more) 4-27-2016 3:12pm
              an interview."
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            • I don't agree with that, the interview tells them a lot. They know what they are looking for. 4-27-2016 4:01pm
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              • This. Lots of Sn schools spend s lot of time with the child 21 hr 2 min ago
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          • The schools care about the testing. As long as the child is well behaved s/he has a decent chance if s/he gets an interview. 19 hr 33 min ago
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            • Well behaved is not the only thing. They are looking to see how much social and language support your child needs along with learning support. If a report glosses over those...(more) 19 hr 25 min ago
              issues in the hopes of making a child seem like a better fit for a school, it will come out during the interview.
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        • OR: no amount of parent prodding will make a square peg fit in a round hole. It won't even get the square peg an interview. I have BTDT. The neuropsych does not get your kid in....(more) 4-27-2016 3:20pm
          It does not even get your kid an interview (if he does not fit). Better to accept this up front than be wildly disappointed (BTDT too).
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          • Our NP knew the school we wanted and gave unnecessary tests that showed our child to worst advantage (tests that the school didn't ask for -we had a list). Asked NP to take them...(more) 4-27-2016 4:50pm
            off, she refused. School told us dc was turned down due to those two short tests. $5000 down the drain for that NP.
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            • i am sorry, sounds so frustrating 18 hr 42 min ago
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    • There are lots of people often mentioned on this list and I know plenty of people who have gotten into all of the SN programs with free or sliding scale ones as well, this...(more) 4-27-2016 3:45pm
      board is really weird about SALSBERG being the best and the one who gets you a placement and funding and while he is good (or great) this is just not true
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      • salsberg is trusted--he will not write reports to get a placement--his reports help because they provide an accurate asseesment of yoiur child 4-27-2016 4:01pm
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        • he will not help you get a kid into the wrong school but his reports open doors at the right school 4-27-2016 4:02pm
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          • Because the schools know that he assess kids well. And LOTS of other neuropsychs do too! They know his reports are accurate and there are other NPs they like just as much. 4-27-2016 4:03pm
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            • i do not disagree-- 4-27-2016 4:09pm
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      • lots of people here have used him which is why you hear about him. If they had used someone else you'd hear about that person. 19 hr 34 min ago
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    • Janine Pollack, Beryl Nightingale, Nelson Dorta, David Gottesfeld, Mary Rogevich, Adelphi, Lennox Hill 4-27-2016 4:38pm
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      • We had an eval with Dr. Dorta. I personally wouldn't reccomend him. Had subsequent eval with Dr. laura Tagliareni, Dr. Salsberg's partner and it was so much more personal,...(more) 4-27-2016 6:42pm
        detailed and helpful. She also helped us placement wise and advocated unbelievably to help us get deferral. Dd now in funded SN school and is doing beautifully. Working with Dr. Taglireni was a whole other level of eval and support imo.
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        • Do you know whether it is an additional fee for her to participate in the IEP meeting, either telephonically or in person? 5 hr 9 min ago
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    • The important things we found in our NP experience and the whirlwind that followed was that the NP GOT our dc. And also really knew the schools, admission people and even other...(more) 4-27-2016 5:02pm
      families there. And after all of that helped us decide between schools and was an incredible advocate and knew the legal system. We happened to use Dr Salsberg and understood why he is so well regarded by public and private schools, attorneys and parents. I am sure there are other NPs that are good as well. Our school recommended him and also Dr taglareni (sp?). Maybe worth meeting a few and asking all of these questions and going with your gut!
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      • I am above poster....Dr. Tagliareni was amazing! Was with us every step of the way post eval until dd got to where she needed to be. 4-27-2016 6:44pm
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        • Hmm..are you sure you are not Dr. Tagliareni? 21 hr 38 min ago
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          • np Seriously? I know a lot of people who have used her and loved her. Why would you accuse a neuropsych of coming here and lying to drum up business? That is just plain weird. 21 hr 21 min ago
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          • Yup. I'm sure. Just a parent who was having the hardest time getting my kid services and is beyond thankful for the help I received. 11 hr 51 min ago
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      • They all keep each other in business. Did Salsberg call schools for you? I found the NPs want you to use a lawyer and we did not want to -we didn't need one. 19 hr 31 min ago
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        • We used dr salsberg and he knew hiring an attorney was hard for us. Since we got into a funded school (so thankful!!) he helped us at what turned out to be a huge fight at a CSE -...(more) 10 hr 31 min ago
          but we got them to defer the case so we didn't need an attorney!! I know he also works with Legal aid when families need.
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          • I agree--Salsbergis a mensh. He has been very good to my family 5 hr 37 min ago
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  20. Special Needs Please help with questions for teacher tomorrow at IEP meeting..ds grade 6 in SN class in MS school, new teacher this year, sometimes she's great but she's a yeller. kids are...(more) 4-27-2016 12:34pm (1 reply)
    super anxious and hate being at school from what I've heard and it's definitely true for my ds and another boy I know well. 12 kids 4-7 grade and there are 2 support workers in class. my ds is add and anxious. medicated well finally and doing really great. they've been saying how great he is and every day is great yet his report card last week he has all C's other than gym and art. no indication that he was struggling academically. Although I know he is way behind because he isn't getting grade level work. he gets no homework and there are no tests and I have no idea what he does all day, but he says it's baby work and he is clearly bored out of his mind. Teacher berates them and yells and is very loud and strict even when technically not yelling. I want him in a MS class next year but can already imagine them saying he's not ready. well no he's not because he hasn't been getting any work! socially he's great, on all the sports teams,
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    • op-I know from the last meeting that she is super bossy and pushy and defensive. 4-27-2016 12:35pm
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  21. Special Needs In desperate need of speech therapists or center based speech place in Warwick, NY. Anyone have any info at all? They are trying to tell me they have no one avaiThanks in advance....(more) 4-27-2016 10:59am (6 replies)
    Able for speech at all.
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  22. Special Needs Obat penggugur kandungan asli cytotec pin-2B3CFEE7 jual obat aborsi-aborsi tuntas...(more) 4-26-2016 11:42pm (1 reply)
    Cara pemesanana tlp: 082247258281 pin: 2B3CFEE7 dan kunjungi website resmi kami di www.cytotecaborsituntas.com, anda bisa membayangkan bagaimana cara bekerja Obat Abrorsi secara sempurna serta hasil yang anda nantikan. Pada Situs Ini Seorang pakar dokter telah menjelaskan bahwa misoprostol adalah obat paling ampuh untuk mengatasi terlambat datang bulan anda.
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  23. Special Needs For those parents who have dcs suffering from nervous tics, how long does a certain tic stick around, i am on week 4 and i want to run away sometimes 4-26-2016 9:51pm (6 replies)
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    • Months and years 4-26-2016 9:52pm
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      • op : ( my dc had them a few years ago, 1-3 at a time, not again but this time the sound is driving me insane, or maybe i forgot how bad it really was the other times 4-26-2016 9:53pm
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    • My dd has just started with these. I started saying so,etching then realized that was the worst thing to do. She used to do this thing with her eyes, now she's coughing almost...(more) 4-26-2016 9:52pm
      like a bark. I'm trying so hard not to say anything.
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      • op, i know, they say not to mention it, mine is doing a half hiccup, very low but its non stop and i can hear it from a different floor of the house, mainly i think because i am...(more) 4-26-2016 9:54pm
        listening in for it, dh on the other hand is not bothered by it at all
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        • Was the previous tic a vocal tic or a motor tic? How old is your DC? 4-26-2016 11:26pm
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    • Has come and gone for several years. Particularly heavy right now. 4-27-2016 8:46am
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  24. Special Needs Sometimes being married to a man with AS is exhausting. Dh has no idea why my bff is upset bc he said he does not undertake how she manages all the stuff going on in her head....(more) 4-26-2016 8:19pm (20 replies)
    My dh just does not get how someone could be offended by this. He went on about how her thoughts just don't stop and dh say his intentions were good. Ughhh of to therapy we go.
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    • if she is your bff then shouldn't she understand where that comment came from? 4-26-2016 8:20pm
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      • Yes but that does not mean she wants to hang around him and put herself in a vonurable position. Words hurt, even if said with no malicious intent....(more) 4-26-2016 8:28pm
        dh needs to apologize and work on his filter. Yes, I gave it time but that did not fix it.
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        • can't you or df "see" the road he's going down and warn/stop him? 4-26-2016 9:46pm
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          • Sometimes but no not when he blurts it out. I mean if your asd dc spoke it instead of saying it would you really blame the other person for not stopping it or being more...(more) 4-26-2016 9:58pm
            understanding especially if it's hurtful?
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            • don't think it's about blame. I still need to be made aware at 52. 4-26-2016 10:24pm
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              • Yes that's why I'm bringing him to therapy. 4-27-2016 7:05am
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    • I'll grant you I'm only a few points shy of an AS dx myself, but I actually don't get what exactly was so offensive. Saying that somebody's head seems like a busy place may be...(more) 4-26-2016 8:36pm
      kind of odd in casual conversation, but offensive? Oh dear, you think a lot?
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      • He went on. It was a few offensive sentences attacking her personality. 4-26-2016 8:40pm
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        • ^and it's a tone issue too. If the other person laughs it off its teasing and you can go on. If the other person is hurt and you don't apologize and stop but continue it's mean...(more) 4-26-2016 8:45pm
          And nasty weather or not it's honest or accurate is irrelevant
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          • It's only mean if you realize the other person is hurt. 4-26-2016 8:50pm
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            • No. It's mean if the other person is hurt. That's empathy. 4-26-2016 9:10pm
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              • Hurtful is if the person is hurt. Mean implies malice/intention. 4-26-2016 9:24pm
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                • Really mincing words here- but it's a pattern that's been happening and getting worse. Dh needs to be more aware and apply a filter. He was wrong. We teach our kids think it...(more) 4-26-2016 9:30pm
                  don't say it same with adults.
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                  • Is he taking anything for impulse control? A lot of folks with AS use something like Intuniv. 4-26-2016 9:31pm
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                    • Thanks for trying but this is an adult, that's for him and his therapist to discuss which is why we are going back to therapy.... It's a common pattern for as/nt marriages just...(more) 4-26-2016 9:34pm
                      Frustrating and I came here to vent.
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                  • ^and dh only cares now bc he wants couple friends and well it's a problem. 4-26-2016 9:32pm
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    • Does your BFF not know your husband well enough to know that she would need to just be direct, and tell him that the line of his conversation makes her feel bad? Do you have a...(more) 4-26-2016 8:52pm
      signal worked out with him to alert him when he's hit a social tripwire?
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      • Have you read the book, The Other Half of Asperger's Syndrome?...(more) 4-26-2016 8:58pm
        It's pretty eye-opening
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        • Yes to all and have been happy married for 15 years and like any couple you can't chaperone all the time and yes she knows but I'm sure you've been hurt by someone in your life....(more) 4-26-2016 9:13pm
          Sometimes people say things and your awe struck and silent. Dh says shit no one else could and gets away with it all the time but he crossed a line this time and my bff is sick of it. She'll hang out with me but is done with him.
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          • I;m sorry and I understand. That sounds hard. You came to vent, not sure why someone kept coming back at you. It was not your fault ot your friend's, your dh needs to learn to...(more) 18 hr 48 min ago
            control himself.
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  25. Special Needs This afternoon I drove for 3 hours, quizzed ADHD ds about his problematic day, had an hour with his therapist, then spoke at length with his teacher. It's all so confusing & I...(more) 4-26-2016 7:41pm (28 replies)
    don't know what to do, how to help anyone, I'm sitting here shaking (after putting baby to bed and cooking dinner, debriefing ds again & putting him to bed).
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    • Why not have some wine and let it go? 4-26-2016 7:42pm
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      • Because it's a puzzle that some part of my brain thinks I can solve 4-26-2016 7:43pm
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        • TOTI mom, I TOTALLY get this. and you will, but not in a night. 4-26-2016 7:44pm
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    • why quiz & absorb it. there are going to be good & bad days 4-26-2016 7:44pm
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      • Because it's a convoluted situation with peers, social stuff, classroom stuff, meds, therapy 4-26-2016 7:44pm
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        • you break it down & try to keep it cimple 4-26-2016 7:45pm
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        • Let it go 4-26-2016 7:46pm
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          • What do you mean let it go? Like for tonight? Because no I'm collecting data and trying to figure out the truth and considering meds changes etc 4-26-2016 7:47pm
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            • You dont need to collect data. You're not his behaviorist you're his mom 4-26-2016 7:50pm
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              • Yes I do. I report what the teachers say, what ds thinks, how he does with peers, how he acts at home etc. I sit & the therapist asks me all of that 4-26-2016 7:51pm
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                • ^ today the possibility of bi polar was raised 4-26-2016 7:52pm
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                  • Is this a child psychiatrist? If not I would seek more professional advice. 19 hr 21 min ago
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                • Maybe you have a bad therapist 4-26-2016 7:54pm
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                  • Why is what I'm saying so weird? Of course I report on ds to her. How else would we do this? 4-26-2016 7:55pm
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                    • np: this poster is only here to antagonize you and you don't need it. please don't respond. 4-26-2016 7:59pm
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                      • Oh ok I was surprised on the sn board, but ADHD anything always gets treated like this 4-26-2016 8:00pm
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                        • some people have all boards checked 4-26-2016 8:01pm
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                          • Yes but I thought there was a code of honor :) save the trolling for the other boards 4-26-2016 8:01pm
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    • maybe he just needs some down time. and you do too 4-26-2016 7:44pm
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      • it wasn't just today 4-26-2016 7:45pm
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    • what age? 4-26-2016 7:55pm
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      • 7, we started medicating earlier this year, it got better, now it's getting worse but he's in the craziest class and the teachers don't really tell me what's going on, and what ds...(more) 4-26-2016 7:58pm
        Complains about or reports is vastly different from what teacher says but honestly and I know no one will believe me, I think the truth is in the middle (not re his behavior but re stuff with other kids)
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        • who is prescribing the meds? can they observe dc in school? 4-26-2016 8:04pm
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          • His psychiatrist and she hasn't, but we could possibly get someone else in to observe. Just one of the things I'm considering. Also whether to try talking to admin about other...(more) 4-26-2016 8:06pm
            kids & playground/lunch supervision knowing my ds is not doing himself any favors / drawn to the frey, but definitely being picked on by some kids who are truly awful
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    • I am so sorry. I had a day like that not too long ago and then had a dream where I was dying by bleeding to death and no one knew what to do who to call where to go. I realized I...(more) 4-26-2016 7:58pm
      was trying to take on too much.
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      • Thanks, I only called the teacher because of what ds told me & then I found out more stuff. 4-26-2016 7:59pm
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        • i am so very sorry it sounds overwhelming. give yourself permission to only do what you can without overwhelming yourself 4-26-2016 8:02pm
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