New York City

  1. New York City Manhattan: Where can I find a tutor for my ds for high school chemistry? 6 hr 47 min ago (10 replies)
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    • CUNY or NYU students? columbia students? 6 hr 46 min ago
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      • Yeah, try Columbia...lol 6 hr 45 min ago
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    • browstone. youre welcome. 6 hr 46 min ago
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      • ^huh? 6 hr 44 min ago
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        • brownstone tutors. 6 hr 43 min ago
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          • op:Thank You! 6 hr 40 min ago
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      • Not welcoming you yet as googling that term doesn't work 6 hr 43 min ago
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        • brownstone tutors came up for me. 6 hr 41 min ago
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      • I googled - nothing comes up 6 hr 42 min ago
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      • is this just a plug for brownstone tutors, or are they really special? 6 hr 39 min ago
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  2. New York City How much $ to give as a bday gift to 17 year old? 14 hr 22 min ago (1 reply)
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  3. New York City Can anyone provide feedback on Tower 67 on the UWS? We have school aged dc's, and it would be for a year or so. How are elevators and noise? Tia. 10-19-2014 11:24pm (1 reply)
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    • Never heard of it 10-19-2014 11:25pm
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  4. New York City Houseguest...(more) 10-17-2014 4:51pm (6 replies)
    Am I being selfish? We have a house and a vacation home in desirable locations. We thought we were hosting BIL & SIL for a few days/weeks since they just moved from a different state, but it seems like they have moved in (~1.5 mo now). We never got a firm date on how long they were going to stay because BIL was looking for a job (seems like he has pursued one lead only); SIL has job right now that pays $45k. They "freelance", so they are omnipresent at either our regular home or vacation home. I feel like we are footing the bill for a lifestyle that they don't seem to be working for. I am expecting DB soon, and I want them to find a place of their own, but it seems they are trying to save money. DH suggested we let them stay at our vacation place, but then we essentially relinquish our ability to stay there. WDYT?
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    • They are taking advantage imo - give them a date at which they have to find their own place 10-17-2014 4:53pm
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    • give them a date to be out 10-17-2014 4:55pm
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    • Tell them that you have to fix up nursery/get ready for the baby. Do they think they can be gone in another 2-3 weeks? 10-17-2014 4:55pm
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      • - no subject -...(more) 10-17-2014 4:57pm
        Not sure; that's my plan though...
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    • when are you due 10-17-2014 4:56pm
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      • About 6 weeks from now 10-17-2014 4:59pm
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  5. New York City S/o from ESMS homework post. How much hw/night at Wagner SP, Lab, Salk, and Baruch SP? Thanks so much 10-15-2014 10:49am (7 replies)
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    • np: my kid is in 2nd grade, but my god I can see weighing this as a factor in deciding what school to choose! 10-15-2014 10:50am
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      • I know - a mom said her kid was spending 5 hours/night on hw. My ds is very sporty and plays violin. Something will have to give. 10-15-2014 10:51am
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        • If a child is spending that much time on HW, unless they are doing longer term assignments in one night, there is a problem, and the teacher should be notified. 10-15-2014 10:53am
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    • All pretty much the same 1-2 hours a night 10-15-2014 10:52am
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    • Wagner varies by teacher, Lab middle is known for a big workload. It is Middle School, you can expect 20-30 min per subject nightly. 10-15-2014 10:52am
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      • Salk Mom: Rarely does DC get 20-30 minutes per subject. More llike 20-30 minutes total, if that, plus 45 minutes of reading. Occasionally, they have big group projects that take...(more) 10-15-2014 10:56pm
        more time.
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    • Baruch hasn't had much homework yet IMO. I am not unhappy about this as I think HW is overrated. 10-15-2014 1:11pm
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  6. New York City Any East Side Middle School moms on? I read a while back that hw was taking hours and hours/night. Has that evened out? Any other thoughts on the school? Thanks! 10-15-2014 9:55am (6 replies)
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    • about 2 hrs a night here, tough with sports 10-15-2014 9:56am
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    • I have yet to meet someone with a child in ESMS who does not say the homework load is really heavy. But the load in HS is heavy as well- can be 3-4 hours nightly. 10-15-2014 9:58am
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      • What about NEST? 10-15-2014 9:59am
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        • less math hw so far due to a staffing issue (math teacher left, have had sub for a few weeks) 10-15-2014 1:13pm
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      • There's a big difference between 3 -4 hours/night in HS and 5 hours/night in 6th grade 10-15-2014 10:51am
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      • i find it to be 1.5 to 2 hrs per night. but that includes all reading. 10-15-2014 5:10pm
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  7. New York City I never ever thought I would say this, but I'm thinking about going on meds. I'm under a lot of stress, going through menapause and emotional wreck. Anyone else been there and...(more) 10-14-2014 7:59am (10 replies)
    done that? What did they take and what was the outcome?
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    • Anti depressants? Or hormone replacement? What does your dr say? 10-14-2014 8:02am
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      • On HRT. But I really feel like I'm losing it. The mood swings, coupled with outside pressure, have me in a manic state. 10-14-2014 8:03am
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    • I went on pill. 1000% better. talk to your gyn. 10-14-2014 8:02am
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      • Nr- Not quite there but still on bc pill at 45. I can't imagine my life without it... The week when I am off feels terrible 10-14-2014 8:05am
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        • Is it the mood swings? Mine are all over the map 10-14-2014 8:06am
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          • Mood, low energy, migraines... 10-14-2014 8:06am
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          • I always had PMS and when I got my period that was over. When my periods were very irregular I felt like I had PMS and anxiety all month ("When will it be over?!") It got me back...(more) 10-14-2014 8:07am
            to nornmal
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            • For me it's intense anger / anxiety and sadness 10-14-2014 8:12am
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    • Yes, my black moods at PMS were seriously affecting my relationships. I take Zoloft for 6-7 days during PMS and it makes a big difference in my volatility. I've always been an...(more) 10-14-2014 8:08am
      extremely emotional person and for me it's very related to hormones.
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      • ita. I tool it 25 mg days 21-28, life changing 10-14-2014 8:09am
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  8. New York City Any Spence parents on? 10-13-2014 12:04pm (12 replies)
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    • yes 10-13-2014 12:05pm
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      • I heard they send thank you postcards post parent tour/interviews for families they're interested in. do they do this or do it for everyone?...(more) 10-13-2014 12:07pm
        any insight you can share on the process would be great!
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        • they do this for everyone. Also, there is a rumor if you don't meet with the DOA you don't have a shot. We didn't meet with the DOA and were accepted. Good luck! 10-13-2014 12:09pm
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          • great. thank you. any guidance as we go through the process? how important is it to know people, etc? 10-13-2014 12:10pm
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            • I have heard that people have others write letters but I really don't think they help. We did not have anyone write us letters. 10-13-2014 12:11pm
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              • thank you! what do you think set up apart? can you share any insight on the playdate? i really appreciate your help! 10-13-2014 12:12pm
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            • OP: or insight into what the dd's do during the playdate? 10-13-2014 12:11pm
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              • I think they listen to a story, answer questions in a group and maybe some table play. Let me as dd! 10-13-2014 12:12pm
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                • dd is here with a friend and they both said they did work at tables and remember puzzles. Don't stress out, dd will feel it. Let her just have fun. DD said Spence was really...(more) 10-13-2014 12:15pm
                  nice, there was another school that made her nervous but it wasn't Spence.
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                  • so helpful! are you happy with the school? sounds like dd is having a good experience! 10-13-2014 12:16pm
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                    • Very happy. The girls have a great curriculum, enjoy going to school everyday, and the teachers really get your dd. There are a lot of great schools in NYC. We are all lucky...(more) 10-13-2014 12:21pm
                      to be in a great place. Good luck.
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                      • thank you again. i really appreciate it! 10-13-2014 12:22pm
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  9. New York City This post has been disliked 3 times. showDinner service for busy parents...(more) 10-10-2014 5:00pm (0 replies)
    Hi, I am doing research for a food delivery project that helps busy parents with their dinner planning and sourcing.

    Would love to chat with moms that live in Manhattan and struggle with their dinner planning or just wish there would be a better way to do it. It will be 5mins :)

    Please reply here, send me a PM or write to matisere (at) gmail

    Thanks in advance!
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  10. New York City Service for food delivery for busy parents...(more) 10-10-2014 4:52pm (0 replies)
    Hi! I am doing research for a food delivery project that helps busy parents with their dinner planning and sourcing.
    Would love to chat with moms that live in Manhattan and struggle with their dinner planning or just wish there would be a better way to do it. If you have 5mins, please reply, send me a PM or write to matisere at gmail
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  11. New York City Note to teachers at dc's school: when someone smiles at you outside school, consider the possibility that the person's dd had you as a teacher and is being friendly. Yes, you may...(more) 10-9-2014 7:20pm (6 replies)
    not remember every parent you've ever met, but smile for god's sake, don't look assaulted and offended.
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    • It could've been in your head 10-9-2014 7:21pm
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    • ^^^ and by outside of school, I mean at the school's doors, not somewhere else! 10-9-2014 7:21pm
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    • it seems like you really got your feelings hurt 10-9-2014 7:24pm
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    • Overreact much? 10-9-2014 7:25pm
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  12. New York City Do you know of any marriages that were saved by separation? DH initiated, I said ok and am moving out w kids this weekend. Not sure If my heart will harden but I'm wondering if...(more) 10-9-2014 5:15pm (21 replies)
    his might soften with the loneliness he'll experience of the kids and me gone as he rattles around our townhouse alone.
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    • do not move. 10-9-2014 5:16pm
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    • wait, your dh wants to separate, but he's making you and the kids leave? why? 10-9-2014 5:17pm
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    • why doesn't he get out? why are you uprooting the kids? 10-9-2014 5:17pm
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    • sounds like an ass. Why do kids leave 10-9-2014 5:18pm
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    • DO NOT move out without checking with a lawyer first. Please. 10-9-2014 5:19pm
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    • No, I don't . Don't move out, if you do he can keep your home if you divorce 10-9-2014 5:20pm
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      • that is totally legally incorrect 10-9-2014 5:21pm
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        • Are you a divorce attorney in ny state? 10-9-2014 5:22pm
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          • yes 10-9-2014 5:22pm
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            • how convenient. and I'm an anthropologist 10-9-2014 5:24pm
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              • nice for you, I know more about divorce law than you do. 10-9-2014 5:25pm
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                • except you aren't a divorce attorney in New York State 10-9-2014 5:26pm
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                  • i actually am. 10-9-2014 5:26pm
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                    • np - the 'fake' 'no I'm not' argument makes NO SENSE on YBM. Just state that you don't believe the person has any credentials and move on. There's nothing to prove 10-9-2014 5:27pm
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                      • that's true, but I hate when people give out incorrect legal information on this site, it is unfair to people 10-9-2014 5:30pm
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        • No it isn't. He can claim she abandoned the home and their marriage 10-9-2014 5:22pm
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          • abandonment is no longer a ground in NY state, the law was changed and this is a no fault state 10-9-2014 5:22pm
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    • that doesn't sound very thoughtful. Why are you moving out? what is the parenting schedule? what is the financial arrangement? Are you both commited to working on the marriage?...(more) 10-9-2014 5:21pm
      How are you going to work on the marriage? what are you telling your children??? It seems like you both have a lot of work to do if a separation has any hope of helping. Right now it seems ill thought out and dangerous to the family.
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      • If she doesn't move out he can't sleep there with his GF. 10-9-2014 5:24pm
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    • Guys don't often initiate unless they have someone else. Don't count on getting back together. 10-9-2014 5:22pm
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    • Did you cheat? 10-9-2014 5:25pm
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  13. New York City Homework Helper...(more) 10-9-2014 5:15pm (3 replies)
    Hi! I am looking for a homework helper to do hw and read with my my 3 children ages 5-10 2 hours a week with a possibility of longer. The hours would be around 3-30-5;30
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    • People actually pay for this? 10-9-2014 5:16pm
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      • np- god yes. 10-9-2014 5:17pm
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    • i would pay for this 10-9-2014 5:18pm
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  14. New York City Want to buy my nephew a watch for his 18th Birthday - in the $500 range - any recommendations on brands? 10-6-2014 9:37am (4 replies)
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    • he wants such a thing? 10-6-2014 9:38am
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    • Shinola watches are really cool...(more) 10-6-2014 9:39am
      • ita. those are really nice 10-6-2014 9:45am
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        • thank you and yes, he wants a nice watch - his request 10-6-2014 9:47am
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  15. New York City A year and half back i discovered my husband of 8 yrs, father of my two little children who adore him, most caring, loving husband someone i trusted 200%,...(more) 10-6-2014 8:07am (26 replies)
    loved by my entire extended family was soliciting men on craigslist.I was completed blindsided that he had an alternate life and online identity the entire time i knew him and earlier. He immediately went to counseling, he then admitted that he was abused as a child when he was 9 by his gym teacher. Suddenly it explained his anger issues, erectile dysfunction issues, anxiety and supposedly sex addiction. He claims that having confronted the demons of his past, he now is free from sex addiction and soliciting men on craigslist. He is trying everything he can to save our family. However i have been unable to forgive him and even though for the sake of the kids we are co-parenting and i understand him being a victim on some level, the marriage is lost. I cannot let him even touch me. Just am unable to get past the betrayal. Plus i don't know if he is past the addiction, just don't know what it is that he needs to do to get back the trust. Is there any hope? Don't know what
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    • i hope you are in therapy as well. this is a lot to do on your own. g l 10-6-2014 8:09am
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    • Oh I'm sorry. How hard for both of you. Good luck. 10-6-2014 8:10am
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    • i'm really sorry this happened to you. I doubt it is helpful for me to say but your feelings are completely understandble. in your shoes i would do counseling alone to work...(more) 10-6-2014 8:10am
      through my feelings and decide what I want or can do. I am glad your dh got help but I would insist he stay in counseling himself bc like any other addiction, I dont' think you can suddenly declare yourself cured and no more work to be done on it.
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    • That sounds very difficult! Did he just solicit of did he actually meet up with them. Do you think he's being totally honest 10-6-2014 8:11am
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      • he met up..but this has been going on since teenage years, some form of reenacting the abuse. he claims he felt disgusted after the fact every time. 10-6-2014 8:12am
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        • Is he in individual counseling? 10-6-2014 8:13am
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          • he went for some time but not anymore..after a while he didn't feel he was getting anywhere. once he came clean with the abuse, the nightmares kinda stopped, he stopped being...(more) 10-6-2014 8:17am
            angry and felt lighter, after that he didn't feel there was any incremental value in the counseling.
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            • Do you agree? Sounds like this is huge and ongoing counseling would help. 10-6-2014 8:19am
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              • i don't know. i do see a change in his behavior. i.e the anger is gone, he seems at peace there is no anxiety. but i can't believe the addiction which was there for 18+ years,...(more) 10-6-2014 8:22am
                just disappeared.
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                • It hasn't. Even if he's not acting out on it. You don't heal from this quickly. 10-6-2014 8:23am
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    • he is happy for me to put trace on his phone, computer etc, give me all his passwords. He promptly transferred all our assets to my name. but i can't trust him again. should i put...(more) 10-6-2014 8:15am
      these trace...online activity tracker.
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      • just feeling very depressed and lonely. not something i can discuss with friends and family. 10-6-2014 8:16am
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      • it may give you some comfort but I suspect that your feelings are based less on logic than emotions. like you said you understand the "why" and can see he is doing all the right...(more) 10-6-2014 8:19am
        things to address the issue and yet you are still feeling you can't trust him and don't want him to touch you etc. I think feelings of betrayal go way deeper than we can heal with just our brains, if that makes sense. it sounds like it is a relationship that is worth the work to try to heal but I think it will take your own therapy separate from him to determine what healing will look like
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    • I don't want to sound harsh because this would rock my world too, but can't you just let him be gay? I mean. He's gay. Let him. 10-6-2014 8:16am
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      • Np: this isn't about him being gay--I know a number of sex addicts, and it's not uncommon for them to meet up with men, not because of sexual orientation, but for a number of much...(more) 10-6-2014 8:18am
        more complicated reasons.
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    • Is he working with a CSAT and are you in couples? I agree with those who say you should get an individual therapist for you, to work on this stuff. And a year and a half is not...(more) 10-6-2014 8:17am
      very long--your work was turned upside down. For me, it probably took a year just to process it--to get past the utter shock. Did he do a full disclosure and take a polygraph? And is he doing 12 step work? I think it's such a hard addiction to treat--even if they're not acting out sexually, the lying, self loathing, complete inability to be intimate, all of that takes so much time. I'm really sorry you're going through this.
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      • he did individual and we had a few couples but i am not in individual, i just don't feel comfortable. 10-6-2014 8:20am
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        • np imo you both need to get comfortable with more counseling. if you want to save the relationship and function as healthy adults. even if you decide you don't want to stay...(more) 10-6-2014 8:22am
          married, this experience will impact your future relationships very much. not to mention how happy you will or won't be alone.
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        • I think you really should. For you. Np 10-6-2014 8:22am
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        • Honestly, this isn't something either of you has a hope of getting through without a lot of therapy. And I never did therapy until I discovered my dh was a SA. It doesn't matter...(more) 10-6-2014 8:26am
          if you're not comfortable with it--believe me, you're going to experience a whole lot of discomfort for a whole lot of time over this. You owe it to yourself and your kids to really process your feelings and figure out what you need. Bottling it up inside you will just make it fester. As for him, it's a huge red flag that he isn't continuing therapy. Every SA I know (and by now I know a number of them and /or their wives) who did not have a long term and genuine recovery plan--individual therapy consistently for at least a few years, 12 step or other recovery groups with a sponsor--and actually doing the step work, not just attending meetings----and couples counseling, again, for an extended period of time--every single one has relapsed and/or replaced his old addiction with a new one. Is he working with a CSAT? If so, they should know this. Did he do a disclosure and take a polygraph? If not, odds are there are still many things you don't know.
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          • no he is not working with a CSAT, he did initially, also went for some recovery group meeting, but didn't feel he related to the group, then he stopped. he hasn't taken polygraph,...(more) 10-6-2014 8:30am
            but i essentially discovered the alternate email address and he gave me the password. it had all the gory details. I don't think there is anything more.
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            • All I can tell you is what I know from my own experience and research/reading. A large number of sex addicts relapse between 6 and 18 months after they go into recovery because...(more) 10-6-2014 8:51am
              they start dealing with their issues, their secret is out in the open (at least to their partners) and it feels as if a huge weight has been lifted. It's almost euphoric. But the thing is, they've barely broken the surface in dealing with the decades of crap in their lives that brought on this behavior. They may be sober, but they haven't changed their inner workings. My dh went into therapy, after half a dozen sessions felt so much better and thought he "got it"--he understood why he'd done what he'd done, and what a horrible impact it had on him, on me, on our family, and he knew he could never do that again. Then he said the dame thing about couples after a few months. He hated the group he joined, he hated the 12 step meetings at first. He talked all the time about how much better he felt and how much he understood. But honestly, it was a deal breaker for me--my therapist and I came up with a list of what I needed from him in order to feel safe en
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              • ^^enough to continue our marriage and try to reconcile. Thst included him being in individual therapy, in twelve step with a sponsor and doing the work, couples, transferring sll...(more) 10-6-2014 8:58am
                our savings into my name (except his retirement savings), 100% honesty and transparency! as well as obviously ceasing any of the acting out behaviors. Even if he told a small lie about ANYTHING that first year or toe, it would set us back months. He needed to change the way his brain worked--he was so used to hiding things, not expressing his feelings, avoiding conflict, whatever--that he really didn't know how to live another way. He is a different man today, and it's amazing--it also has so changed the way we parent our kids. Therapy isn't supposed to be fun or even necessarily enjoyable--it's hard work and it something you do because you realize things can't go on as they are. So many of my friends' dhs quit therapy or groups because they didn't like them, but then they never found new ones. This stuff is too firmly entrenched to think it will get better by itself. It won't.
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                • thanks a lot, this has been very helpful. 10-6-2014 9:17am
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    • in last weeks nyt sunday paper a man wrote about being abused and being bisexual but married and not truly being gay . this sounds like your hd 10-6-2014 8:55am
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      • dh says he is not attracted to men, he went through these motions in a dazed, felt violated later and it was his form of punishing himself. Also he repeated...(more) 10-6-2014 9:25am
        the same act that his abuser made him do and unable to get himself engage in any other sexual act with another man. Its all very confusing but to him this was not about sex or sexual attraction.
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  16. New York City Please recommend orthodontists on UWS or UES. also tell me abt bad ones to avoid! TIA 10-2-2014 6:11pm (1 reply)
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    • We love Bronsky Ordthodontics!!! 10-3-2014 11:07am
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  17. New York City My 7th grader got invited to test for the John Hopkins CTY Talent search. He is not a great student but did well on his ERBs last year (national ones). Is there a good reason for...(more) 9-30-2014 5:48pm (12 replies)
    sitting on this exam
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    • sure -- see how he does 9-30-2014 5:48pm
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      • what happens if he does well? 9-30-2014 5:49pm
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        • isn't it a summer program? then send him if he wants to go 9-30-2014 5:50pm
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    • my FL 7th grader just got the same letter. as did most of her friends. 9-30-2014 5:49pm
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      • I figured they are probably pretty common 9-30-2014 5:50pm
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    • dd got this too years ago. She never did the SAT but if she wanted to go tto CTY camps, this is how you get to go to them 9-30-2014 5:56pm
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    • no, b/c the programs are too expensive. 9-30-2014 5:57pm
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    • My dc could have participated in the program (both at home when younger and the summer) and just didn't want to. And that was fine with me. 9-30-2014 6:00pm
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    • The best single reason for taking the test is that it can make your dc feel like one of the smart kids at school. My dc all took it, one did three of the summer camps and loved...(more) 9-30-2014 6:05pm
      them
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    • yes. if it opens up some doors it may help wtih college down the road 9-30-2014 6:17pm
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    • My ds did the online math program for a while. He liked it. 9-30-2014 6:19pm
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  18. New York City My husband hates his colleagues and tells me all of their gossip. I am shocked (but not really) and how many of them are cheating. It is hard to go to work parties and look their...(more) 9-30-2014 2:12pm (13 replies)
    wives in their faces.
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    • What industry? 9-30-2014 2:13pm
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      • Shipping (but he is in corporate) 9-30-2014 2:16pm
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    • This makes me sad (about the cheating) 9-30-2014 2:14pm
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    • does he want to change industries? 9-30-2014 2:14pm
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      • Yes, but he won't. His company still has a pension and he is not far off from it. 9-30-2014 2:17pm
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    • My dh used to tell me this too. Turned out he was cheating as well. It is not healthy to be surrounded by cheaters who think it's ok. 9-30-2014 2:15pm
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      • I agree. I wish he would find a new job with people he actually likes. 9-30-2014 2:19pm
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    • their wives probably are too 9-30-2014 2:15pm
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      • I doubt it. Most are SAHM with little kids. 9-30-2014 2:18pm
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        • doesn't matter 9-30-2014 2:19pm
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    • I just found out my friend's DH cheats, and I always thought he was such a decent person 9-30-2014 2:16pm
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      • DH one told me that a friend's dh cheats. Changed my opinion of him forever. 9-30-2014 2:17pm
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  19. New York City My dd 10yo is getting braces... today. best suggestions for post-braces meals... TIA 9-30-2014 11:17am (28 replies)
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    • soup, yogurt 9-30-2014 11:17am
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    • soup 9-30-2014 11:18am
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    • enough with this already. you act like your kid is the only one to ever get braces. 9-30-2014 11:18am
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      • np - fuck off 9-30-2014 11:19am
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      • op- don't really know what you are talking about. first time posting. 9-30-2014 11:20am
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        • what a coinkedink 9-30-2014 11:20am
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          • np maybe you are here too much and should just pay attention to the posts that you really want to 9-30-2014 11:22am
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        • np: yeah right. 9-30-2014 11:21am
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    • i'd get matzo ball soup 9-30-2014 11:18am
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      • we are muslim 9-30-2014 11:19am
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        • ok... then... chicken noodle soup? same thing, different name if it makes you more comfortable? 9-30-2014 11:19am
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          • still too jewish, but thanks. 9-30-2014 11:19am
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            • seriously? yikes. 9-30-2014 11:20am
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              • naw come on! you silly head! 9-30-2014 11:20am
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              • op- non of this thread is me. 9-30-2014 11:21am
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      • ty 9-30-2014 11:22am
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    • bagels, caramel apples (in season now!), peanut brittle and carrots 9-30-2014 11:18am
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    • gee, anything SOFT? you' can't figure this out? 9-30-2014 11:19am
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      • you seem nice. 9-30-2014 11:23am
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    • OMG DID YOU STAY IN THE OFFICE OR LEAVE? 9-30-2014 11:20am
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    • meat loaf, mashed potatoes, chicken stew with dumplings, milkshakes, smoothies, applesauce 9-30-2014 11:21am
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      • ty 9-30-2014 11:21am
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      • ^tuna sandwiches on NONcrusty bread, noodle, cheese, peas, baked acorn squash with butter and brown sugar. That's it!^ 9-30-2014 11:24am
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    • everything toddlers like. :) mac and cheese, bread, chicken nuggets. 9-30-2014 1:16pm
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  20. New York City If a man transgenders into a woman, does this mean he is definitivelygay? 9-29-2014 10:16pm (10 replies)
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    • No. 9-29-2014 10:17pm
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    • sorry meant definitely gay 9-29-2014 10:17pm
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    • Lord Jesus who knows? They all have some crazy shit going on? 9-29-2014 10:17pm
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    • sexual preference is totally different than gender identity 9-29-2014 10:18pm
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      • OP: this is what I had sort of assumed--but if a man transgenders to a woman, and pursues relationships with women, is he a lesbian? (Sounds like I'm joking or snarking. I'm not.) 9-29-2014 10:19pm
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    • No. When I was growing up in Dallas there was a well-known restaurateur who transgendered from man to woman; he continued to have romantic relationships wi women. 9-29-2014 10:18pm
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    • what would gay mean? that person is a woman. is she gay if she dates women or gay if she dates men? 9-29-2014 10:18pm
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      • see question above. would bruce jenner be a lesbian if he still wanted to be with women post-gender reassignment? 9-29-2014 10:20pm
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    • so odd, meaning the people that transgender in order to be gay. of course I feel like a gay man😳 9-29-2014 10:25pm
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  21. New York City Visceral food description inside--avoid post if squeamish...(more) 9-28-2014 9:49pm (7 replies)
    Bought a rotisserie chicken tonight and after I reheated and cut the strings on it it opened up in such a way that it looked like a frog--legs splayed out--and as I was cutting it up for leftovers what I guess was the spinal column (or something bony and spiraled) fell out. I do not think I can ever eat chicken again.
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    • yeah, you didn't realize that chickens had a spine? 9-28-2014 9:51pm
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      • No, I confess is never thought about it. About any meat specifics, really. 9-28-2014 9:53pm
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    • We who eat meat do see bones, once in a while. Many of us get that it doesn't fall from heaven in the form of a cooked steak or fajitas or something. 9-28-2014 9:52pm
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      • Oh, hush. I cook plenty if meat at home. This was just first time I'd had such exposure to innards. 9-28-2014 9:56pm
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    • You are a delicate flower 9-28-2014 9:56pm
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      • Hardly. I cook steak easily four times a week. Big meat eater here. 9-28-2014 9:57pm
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        • Visit an abattoir. Then decide if you want to eat meat. It should be choice based on knowledge. 9-30-2014 12:53pm
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  22. New York City Any Keto diet moms on? I'm doing for first time and it's bizarre--I feel like my mood swings are drastically lessened, energy is much increased. Normal? (Not complaining!) 9-28-2014 9:33pm (10 replies)
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    • how long? 9-28-2014 9:36pm
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      • Going on 3 weeks. 9-28-2014 9:36pm
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        • how soon did you notice changes? 9-28-2014 9:37pm
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          • In first week. But also I went into ketosis at end of day 2 according to keto urine test strips. 9-28-2014 9:45pm
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        • does your sweat smell like ammonia? 9-28-2014 9:38pm
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          • No but urine scent is gross--as are protein farts! 9-28-2014 9:46pm
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    • what is this diet in a nutshell? For weightloss or just better health? 9-28-2014 9:39pm
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  23. New York City Have to try this again; my dd went on a chat site and sent a nude pic to the person. Its anonymous and touted as a tween/teen board. She came to me very distraught and now we are...(more) 9-22-2014 4:09pm (72 replies)
    both upset. She regrets it completely so I am not sure punishment here is required; It was a mistake and she is very intelligent; not just because its my dc...u know ur dc's...how can I help her cope and ME cope too? I know in my previous post the responses were to take away devices; this is not a case of continuous bad behaviour, rather what do you do when they come to you and say they made a mistake? (of this proportion?) Signed, just trying to be a good parent like you.
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    • Yikes! I have a 10yo dd, this is one of my nightmares. 9-22-2014 4:10pm
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    • how old? 9-22-2014 4:11pm
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    • I'm sorry but how intelligent could she possibly be if she is posting nude pictures of herself online? 9-22-2014 4:11pm
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      • it was a mistake...curiousity got the best of her. What can I say. no ones perfect 9-22-2014 4:12pm
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        • np- you sound like a stupid and passive mother. They are the ones with kids fucking dozens on men, sending nude photos, drunk all the time, etc. because they are so hard up to be...(more) 9-22-2014 4:14pm
          cool, and mom and dad don't actually care.
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        • ok but just shrugging your shoulders and blaming it on curiosity is not going to help. She needs to understand how serious this is, and how big of a mistake she made. this isnt...(more) 9-22-2014 4:14pm
          like she snuck in after curfew, this could have had serious consequences for her.
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          • actually asking for advice not shrugging shoulders at all. Very concerned. Or cant you tell 9-22-2014 4:16pm
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            • That is extremely sexual for a 12 yo. I think she needs counseling 9-22-2014 4:20pm
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            • we can't. 9-22-2014 4:20pm
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            • Why is your 12yo so desperate for male attention she will get naked and take photos and send them to him, not even knowing him? What is going on in her life? Something MAJOR and...(more) 9-22-2014 4:22pm
              yu have no clue. You just think she is intelligent.
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              • THIS. Where there's smoke, there's fire. I'd look into it further so fast my head would spin. 9-25-2014 5:28pm
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    • so maybe a punishment is not the answer but at the very least a very harsh, serious talk is in order. Something like this could follow her for the rest of her life. it was very...(more) 9-22-2014 4:12pm
      stupid to do and she clearly is not as intelligent as you say.
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      • again, no one is pefect. We all make STUPID mistakes. If we had internet back then, God knows what would be on there. 9-22-2014 4:14pm
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        • well, i am in my 20s and I had the internet in my teens. And I never made that mistake and I knew better. And girls know even MORE now. She is not bright. And insecure as fuck -...(more) 9-22-2014 4:15pm
          np
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        • stop repeating yourself. You can here asking for answers and you're justifying your DD's actions all over the place. 9-22-2014 4:18pm
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        • Ok, so when she is pg by some 30yo at 16, then yo unmake some more excuses and call them mistakes. Make sure you tell everyone how bright she is though! 9-22-2014 4:19pm
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        • My naked body would not 9-22-2014 4:22pm
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        • Why do you keep justifying this frightening incident? How are you not beside yourself? This has nothing to do with the Internet. 9-25-2014 5:30pm
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    • I think you should take away devices, not as punishment, but because she's shown that she doesn't yet have the maturity to use them without doing something stupid. It sounds over...(more) 9-22-2014 4:13pm
      dramatic, but there's really no margin for error when it comes to the internet.
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      • Agree or obtain all passwords and monitor. A 12 yo should understand why this this is stupid and forever 9-22-2014 4:21pm
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        • I would be worried something else is going on. That is way too young for this stuff. Most 12 yos think posed bikini shots are daring. 9-22-2014 4:30pm
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          • Completely agree. I have posted here that I think the girl needs counseling 9-22-2014 4:36pm
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          • Agree. Has she been exposed to someone unaccompanied--an older, male figure? 9-25-2014 5:32pm
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    • This post has been disliked 3 times. showI think you need to reevaluate how intelligent you think she is. How many times do girls need to be told not to do this? And unless she is 16 plus with a job and paying for out,...(more) 9-22-2014 4:13pm
      no need for any phone, lap tops, pads. sorry. She is clearly a moron and another girl who is so fucking concerned being sexy and hot she does stupid shit she has been warned not to do. Now, her nude photo is everywhere being shared. She is THAT girl. Congrats. But she is HOT! Yay!
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      • ouch. 9-22-2014 4:14pm
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      • Np: WHOA! You have some serious issues 9-22-2014 4:14pm
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        • funny, i think the girl with her pussy and tits on display for a bunch of guys online has issues. 9-22-2014 4:15pm
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          • No, it's still you. Every post reinforces it 9-22-2014 4:16pm
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      • Misogynist Mom weighs in 9-22-2014 4:15pm
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        • don't give a fuck what you call me. at least my girls are not fucking dumb attention whores. 9-22-2014 4:15pm
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          • Let's be honest: you don't have dds. Or you wouldn't speak this way 9-22-2014 4:17pm
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            • oh, i do. Raised right, not given access to things they have no business on. Actually raised to know what doing things like this means/ 9-22-2014 4:18pm
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              • If you already raised them, they were not raised in the age of social media. But I digress. This has nothing to do with raising dds and everything to do with how you talk about...(more) 9-22-2014 4:19pm
                you g girls
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                • np- i am almost 30 and I was on Myspace in high school, i would assume a mom here with 18 to 25yo had kids raised with social media. you sound silly. 9-22-2014 4:21pm
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                  • I am 32 and you are ridiculous if you think what we had is the same as today. 9-22-2014 4:22pm
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                    • the same, no, but ors dcs are likely younger than me and I had myspace in HIGH SCHOOL. of ours her kids would be raised in social media. 9-22-2014 4:24pm
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                • My kids are 16,18,21,and 23. you think i don't know about social media? 9-22-2014 4:27pm
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      • Np. Wow. You are a piece of work. 9-22-2014 4:16pm
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        • her 12yo is already using her body for attention. just imagine 16. I know her type and i know her type of mom. like op. She coddles. 9-22-2014 4:17pm
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          • While I might agree with some of your points, your language and intonation makes you sound like a troll. 9-22-2014 4:18pm
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            • Being angry at the state of our girls and young women and voicing it doesn't make me a troll. Mom sounds like a tart and her dd is a moron raised by the tart. 9-22-2014 4:20pm
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              • Np: stop saying "our girls". You have DS. 9-22-2014 4:21pm
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                • 2 boys, 2 girls. thanks. And not attention whores (the girls or the boys) 9-22-2014 4:23pm
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                  • Again, you're a liar. If you ACTUALLY had dds, you would not speak this way about young girls. 9-22-2014 4:24pm
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                    • lol. grow up. Now YOU sound stupid. I am not talking about MY dds. I don't have morons who are attention whores. If you do, sorry. 9-22-2014 4:25pm
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              • NP; simmer down, you'll get spittle all over the place. 9-22-2014 4:22pm
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      • She may have issues. but don't underestimate the impulsiveness of even a perfect adolescent child, nor the insidiousness of the internet. 9-22-2014 4:17pm
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        • if your 12yo is thinking sexual and trying to be sexual, i would say you failed as a parent. Let alone doing it on the internet. and alone on the internet long enough to be naked,...(more) 9-22-2014 4:18pm
          take a photo and send it. Wonder where mom was?
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          • Oh, you poor thing. Angry AND delusional. Well, don't fret about it a moment longer, it won't ever happen to yours nor to any you know. 9-22-2014 4:20pm
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            • lol. that was a sad way to try and belittle me. Hearing the truth hurts. maybe op should go get her dd the iPhone 6! I know how all the cool 12yos will have one. That way she can...(more) 9-22-2014 4:25pm
              just whip her panties off mid class at school and take a photo, send it out to everyone. But she is really intelligent so she won't put her face in them.
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              • This is getting you a little overly excited, isnt it? 9-22-2014 4:48pm
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          • np: Oh, stop with the "failed as a parent" malarkey. Kids are unpredictable, the Internet is a brand new weird and dangerous thing. We should all be so lucky as to avoid shit like...(more) 9-22-2014 4:20pm
            this.
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    • first, you have to contact the site and tell them she is underage. is the pic up? then, you have to curtail her internet privileges to almost nothing, and she earns them back...(more) 9-22-2014 4:14pm
      slowly.
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      • it was sent to the person she was chatting with...it's not like a board 9-22-2014 4:17pm
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        • Then you need to send a chat message to him letting him know that if he distributes that image online it is child pornography and he will be prosecuted. Her picture will wind up...(more) 9-25-2014 10:02pm
          god knows where.
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    • is it that ask.fm? 9-22-2014 4:14pm
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      • It's omegle.com 9-22-2014 4:15pm
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    • I was on earlier. I understand why you don't want to punish, but she's 12 and clearly doesn't understand the import of what she did or have the impulse control not to do what...(more) 9-22-2014 4:14pm
      clearly was wrong. Those are my hallmarks of maturity to use their own devices. I don't think you can trust her with them at this point. Also, and this is crucial, contact the site and tell them her age. They can be thrown in jail for having any part in the transmission of a nude photo of a minor.
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      • I was here earlier too. OP, I think you don't want to do what you know is the right thing and that's why you're asking again. 9-22-2014 4:16pm
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    • I read that earlier. A talk about the possible harsh reality her actions can lead to. Possible nothing will come of it. Possibly she'll be recognized, for many years to come. It...(more) 9-22-2014 4:16pm
      can't fix what she's done, but can prevent future dangerous behavior.
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    • If she is 12, you need to contact the police 9-22-2014 4:16pm
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    • Why on earth WOULDN'T you take away her devices? 9-22-2014 4:17pm
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      • np; I'm thinking because she learned her lesson? Sometimes a punishment for a horrible transgression that they instantly regret is kind of the same as saying "You totalled your...(more) 9-22-2014 4:19pm
        car? That's it, I'm taking away your keys now!
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        • Maybe she's "learned her lesson" about this, but there are 1,000 other ways to do something dumb online and I'd be pretty concerned that she would do one of those too. 9-22-2014 4:21pm
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        • She is clearly not old enough to have any devices. I could have told op that without the nude 12yo photos. 9-22-2014 4:26pm
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          • They dont need devices, other than a computer, to do that. I'm curious what benefit you believe more punishment will accomplish. If it's to give her more pain and humiliate her...(more) 9-22-2014 4:47pm
            more than she's already done by herself, I dont think that's useful.
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        • How has she learned her lesson? That's she's sad? She needs to earn back her right to be online. If you don't take away the computer for awhile, you're giving tacit approval to...(more) 9-25-2014 10:05pm
          her ability to control herself online.
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    • How old is she? She sounds like she needs counseling. 9-22-2014 4:18pm
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    • I think--and you'll think this is extreme--I'd take her to a therapist to talk it through. I think lots of kids are 'curious' but very few of them do this as a response. I'd j...(more) 9-25-2014 5:27pm
      make sure there's nithjng more going on--deep insecurity, body issues, need for male affirmation, etc.
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      • ITA. This is too a sign of extreme immaturity or something else 9-25-2014 10:00pm
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  24. New York City Good massage therapist below 30th street?? 9-22-2014 1:05pm (1 reply)
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    • what kind of massage? 9-22-2014 3:28pm
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  25. New York City I posted about the naked pic; thing is, her friend who told her about the site has been chatting with strangers for many months now. I can;t tell parents. I need to tell parents....(more) 9-22-2014 11:36am (9 replies)
    I don;t want to cause conflict but they are a pain. I told them once about something and she was like oh my...I wonder how that happened...
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    • what are you talking about? 9-22-2014 11:37am
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    • I'm sorry I'm not following. 9-22-2014 11:37am
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    • You have to tell the parents. 9-22-2014 11:38am
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    • You must tell the parents - C'mon! 9-22-2014 11:39am
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      • I know...I will 9-22-2014 11:40am
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    • You absolutely need to tell the parents. If something happens to their daughter you would feel horrific not to mention it is illegal. 9-22-2014 11:39am
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    • TELL THE PARENTS. I told parents when ds said friend said he smoked weed. Same age. You have to be responsible and tell them. 9-22-2014 11:40am
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    • People we know found out when the police arrived at their door. Utterly head-in-the-sand people, too, who felt that because they had say "no social media" to their kids, that was...(more) 9-22-2014 11:40am
      sufficent. They never even thought to monitor, or snoop.
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      • Wow they were ridiculously derelict as parents 9-25-2014 10:01pm
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