Elementary

  1. Elementary Is 9/10 years when girls get really self conscience and really start struggling socially. DD was fine and all of a sudden is having a hard time 6-9-2014 9:39am (9 replies)
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    • yes. very awkward until around 15. 6-9-2014 9:40am
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      • so why are other girls less self aware...I feel like dd takes herself out of situations bc she feels odd 6-9-2014 9:42am
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        • they all are at some point. 6-9-2014 9:42am
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    • Yes, my dd is 10, having a tough time 6-9-2014 9:41am
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      • any ideas of what can help or just let nature take it's course 6-9-2014 9:42am
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        • build her confidence, help her to accept who she is and not care what other people think 6-9-2014 9:43am
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          • ^easier said than done though. Mine is very hormonal too 6-9-2014 9:43am
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          • trying to do that by encouraging her anything else 6-9-2014 9:44am
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            • outside activities? How exactly is she struggling? 6-9-2014 9:45am
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  2. Elementary I've concluded DW has a serious organization problem. How do I help?...(more) 6-7-2014 8:54pm (27 replies)
    I'm the husband, asking this august group for advice because I'm stumped. We're a professional couple, biglaw partner (me), attorney for private school (her), three small boys. Kids are a mess but things at our house have gotten out of hand and have stayed that way for three years. You're thinking "this asshole expects his wife to maintain a spotless home ..." No, it is not one of those complaints.
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    • zzzzzz 6-7-2014 8:54pm
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    • Define "out of hand" and what are you as a husband, parent, and homeowner doing about it? 6-7-2014 8:55pm
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    • Do you organize together? delegate jobs to each other? Have a calendar on the fridge with then things need to get done? I am a dh with three boys and no wife and it takes a lot of...(more) 6-7-2014 8:55pm
      writing shit down and lists.
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    • what is an august group 6-7-2014 8:55pm
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      • A term he used very generously 6-7-2014 8:56pm
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        • ??? 6-7-2014 8:56pm
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        • so what does it mean? 6-7-2014 8:56pm
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          • With majestic dignity. Not exactly our hallmark. 6-7-2014 8:57pm
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        • Satire 6-7-2014 8:57pm
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      • Fucker is being sarcastic 6-7-2014 8:58pm
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    • Help her. Hire help 6-7-2014 8:55pm
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    • So be more specific and is it her or both of you? Are you expecting more of her (to be the organizer) than you? 6-7-2014 8:56pm
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    • not sure what you expect her to do 6-7-2014 8:57pm
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    • What would you like to see happen? Get specific and tangible 6-7-2014 8:57pm
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    • OP here: Here's the problem...(more) 6-7-2014 8:59pm
      My wife, who is otherwise wonderful and functions great at work, is an organization nightmare and the problem has become untenable. Bills go unpaid .. all of them (so I took all of them on). Her finances got messed up and lost (so I took them over). Medical files piled up and got lost (so i took that over, too). Car had no insurance or registration when we got stopped for having an expired sticker (so I took that over). Piles of her work papers grew so large on the kitchen table that, first we stopped eating there, and then they collapsed on the floor and I said "Look, I'll just box them up and put them in the garage until you can get to them ..." Three years later, our two-car garage is full to a three-foot depth with my boxes of her papers, which she's never looked at after the boxing. Yikes.
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      • Two lawyers: hire a personal assistant 6-7-2014 9:01pm
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      • Lol. I'm like that with piles of paper. Is your house actually dirty or she just leaves paper everywhere? 6-7-2014 9:02pm
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      • Sounds exactly like my dh. Normal for some people. Just make sure she doesnt become a horder. I would kick dh out for that 6-7-2014 9:02pm
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      • She sounds depressed. 6-7-2014 9:06pm
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        • Not depressed, at least according to a psychologist (not psychiatrist)...(more) 6-7-2014 9:11pm
          Diagnosis, if you could call it that, was just "wow, you really have a mental block about getting your personal life together."
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          • And that is a problem with dc. 6-7-2014 9:13pm
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      • Oof. You need a personal assistant/accountant to handle all that 6-7-2014 9:07pm
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      • Personal assistant sounds promising...(more) 6-7-2014 9:10pm
        How much do they cost, if you know?
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    • OP here: yes, I have hired help. Need a new solution....(more) 6-7-2014 9:08pm
      Wife isn't nuts, at least not conventionally. She doesn't qualify as a hoarder -- I can disappear things and she usually doesn't complain, she's not saving stuff for the apocalypse, and here's a biggie: when her friends are coming over, suddenly (or rather, after a frenzied 48 to 72 hours), she gets all her stuff boxed up or hidden. Then it all starts again, and accretes with amazing rapidity. We have a great nanny, who says she's never seen anything like it. We hired a great housekeeper, but what she does is clean -- she can't deal with work papers, kids' medical forms, personal letters, etc. etc. that are piled around. And it's not just paper: unreturned Zappos and Amazon stuff, you name it. I have taken on 100% of the running-of-the-household tasks, and her job (private school's lawyer) is pretty moderate, with 3 months off in the summer. She says she wants to change, and makes efforts to do so that last about 48 hours. So what is
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      • She needs an asst 6-7-2014 9:10pm
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      • OP here: I never considered an assistant. OK, that will be step one. THANKS. 6-7-2014 9:12pm
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      • I want the job! Are you in NYC? 7-10-2014 12:01am
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  3. Elementary - no subject -...(more) 6-5-2014 10:34pm (0 replies)
    Have a child with high avg IQ with processing , attention and reading comp issues. Looking to see what sp needs school would fit her best
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  4. Elementary DH and I are in therapy we went this morning and I'm just now able to process what he said. He feels that I don't initiate sex or want it at all. he feels like he is just the dad...(more) 6-4-2014 5:12pm (2 replies)
    and pay check and that that he tries to initiate romance and I'm tired all the time. While I agree and told him we need to work on this and I need to start feeling good about having sex (I have body image issues post baby). He said man I get jealous when so and so tells me how he and his wife were having sex when the kid walked in and how a co worker says he loves when his wife gives him a pre business trip BJ that it's their thing before car picks up she gives him a bj. It hit me my dh has wife envy
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    • what did therapist say? 6-4-2014 5:14pm
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    • I would love my husband to travel more. If that's all it takes, I'm on my knees! 6-4-2014 5:14pm
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  5. Elementary How often do you see couples where one person is really good looking and the other really is not? 6-2-2014 12:21am (2 replies)
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    • Most of the couples i know equal each other in attractiveness, i think that is pretty standard 6-2-2014 12:23am
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    • Sometimes. Usually it's the woman who is ugly 6-2-2014 12:53am
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  6. Elementary She's alive!!!! 6-2-2014 12:20am (0 replies)
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  7. Elementary I heard sil say i dress like i just left the trailer park circa 1985 6-2-2014 12:16am (2 replies)
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    • Do you wear jean shorts? 6-2-2014 12:16am
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    • I would have fun with that. Next time age hosted a family gathering id show her what 1985 trailer fashion reall 6-2-2014 12:19am
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  8. Elementary Who wears Lilly Pulitzer? 6-2-2014 12:11am (5 replies)
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    • One of my friends who is preppy and does NOT have good taste in clothing. At all. 6-2-2014 12:11am
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    • My teen nieces and Southerners 6-2-2014 12:12am
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    • Isn't that the fair wage lady? 6-2-2014 12:14am
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    • Lots if people where I live in CT. Ugh 6-2-2014 12:17am
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  9. Elementary 12 yr old ds text messages indicate he and his friends are zapped. What does this mean? If I ask him he will be quicker in deleting his texts. 6-1-2014 8:39am (6 replies)
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    • - no subject -...(more) 6-1-2014 8:41am
      • None of those seem to apply. 6-1-2014 8:42am
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    • He's definitely butt-chugging. 6-1-2014 8:42am
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    • Are they gamers? It's a has to thing or there's a new Disney show with zendaya called zapped coming out 6-1-2014 8:45am
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    • zapped like in a video game 6-1-2014 8:52am
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    • I would assume either tired from staying up all night gaming or they're experimenting with drugs 6-1-2014 9:03am
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  10. Elementary I'm depressed today. I work all week long and today has been boring....(more) 5-31-2014 6:56pm (1 reply)
    DD has been sleeping for hours after a sleepover last night. DH and ds are out to dinner. Why work all week and look forward to the weekend? Plus, argued with ds last night. Just depressed. LOastly, dh never got me a bd gift. I know I sound like a baby. I just feel unappreciated. I'm good enough to work 50-60 hrs during the week but not good enough for a gift. He doesn't even know I'm upset. Every w/e he says "We need to get you a gift!" Does he ever persue it?
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    • Mine didn't give am a gift or dinner out for 15 year anniv or Mother's Day this year 5-31-2014 6:58pm
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  11. Elementary Any SAB Moms of boys on? 5-29-2014 10:33pm (0 replies)
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  12. Elementary 12 yr old wants a kik account. Sounds like an opportunity for trouble. Thoughts? 5-29-2014 9:29pm (1 reply)
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  13. Elementary What is your 9 yo ds doing this summer? 5-29-2014 8:24am (1 reply)
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    • A lot of whining about having to go to camp. 5-29-2014 9:35pm
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  14. Elementary Paid Study for Moms w/ Daughters (age 9-13) (Interactive Online Discussion Board)...(more) 5-28-2014 4:39pm (0 replies)
    Hi everyone! I would like to share information about a paid research opportunity for Moms w/ Daughters (age 9-13) w/ Behavioral Issues/ADHD-Like Symptoms. (Feel free to take this down if itís against the page policy).

    We host a private online community discussion board to gain feedback and insights. It will also provide you with a support system where you can share your experiences and connect with other adults from across the country to learn from their experiences.

    Members are compensated monthly for their contributions, among other bonuses and drawings.

    More information can be found at the following link, along with a survey to determine your eligibility to participate. We will follow-up with qualified respondents in the next few weeks.

    https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/HS6NR9N

    Thank you so much for your interest, we look forward to hearing from you!
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  15. Elementary My 9 yr old bites and picks his nails. Wish I could get him to stop. 5-27-2014 10:06pm (2 replies)
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    • Do you cut and file them? 5-27-2014 10:07pm
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    • I would really try. It just gets harder. That stuff that tastes bad works. 5-27-2014 10:11pm
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  16. Elementary My 12 yr old ds is a lying sack of shit. So pissed and dissapointed. Says he brushed his teeth, lied about going to a friend's house after school (a girl), pretends he has to go....(more) 5-27-2014 9:55pm (29 replies)
    Go to the bathroom when he is using his tablet in there (hid it in a cabinet and lied straight to my face about it). Says all his homework his done and then says "I forgot I had to do this." Says he was doing his homework when we know he was using the wii and on and on and on. and he tries to make us feel guilty that we don't trust him. This whole being home alone after middle school has been a disaster. But he is too old for the after school program and we both work. He has become accustomed to too much freedom and is taking it too far. So passed off.
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    • Fake 5-27-2014 9:55pm
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      • You'll see, tot mom. 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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        • I don't call my dc sacks of shit. Dd is 11. 5-27-2014 9:58pm
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    • I share your frustration and I truly think this is a normal young teen reaction to not wanting to get busted. 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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    • Use organic deodorant like Tom's 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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    • He's a 12 year old boy. You expected him to be an angel? 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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    • He has no after school stuff at all? What about sports? 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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      • Op: plays soccer, but that is after my dh or I get home - evening, like 6. 5-27-2014 9:58pm
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        • What about the school team? He can't go home every single day and do nothing. There is no structure. Doesn't work for certain kids 5-27-2014 9:59pm
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          • Not old enough for school team yet, maybe next year. He tried a club and dropped out, he does have art class after school 1 day a week. Nothing else going on. 5-27-2014 10:01pm
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            • I would figure out something. And I don't get why he needs to sneak anything if he is home alone every afternoon. Doesn't he have all afternoon to do nothing 5-27-2014 10:04pm
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              • Op: you and me both. At least I knew enough to turn off the tv and get my chores and homework done before my mother or father walked in that door. 5-27-2014 10:05pm
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    • time for a rewards chart!!! with stickers!!! yay 5-27-2014 9:57pm
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    • i'd unplug him. put him in a sports program or something. anything. the hours between school getting out and dinnertime are the danger zone. and don't call your kid a lying sack...(more) 5-27-2014 9:58pm
      of shit. even on an anonymous message board. it's shitty of you.
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      • ^^^ AND, tell him he will have a babysitter if he can't toe the line. 5-27-2014 10:00pm
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        • We have said that, but it is largely and empty threat. Dh doesn't want to do that. 5-27-2014 10:02pm
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      • Op: I know it is shitty. That is why I did it here. I could never say it out loud. We have unplugged. I hide the wii remotes. We took his tablet tonight and I have been...(more) 5-27-2014 10:01pm
        confiscating his phone (just a calling and texting phone) when I get home and until his hawk, shower is done. I don't want to be so strict - but I don't know what else to do. He is becoming so unbearable. (He does play sports - but not right after school)
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        • He's bored. He needs afterschool activities. What is up w/ him for the summer? 5-27-2014 10:02pm
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          • Lots of day camps and sports camps. No hanging out at home while we are at work - that is for sure. 5-27-2014 10:04pm
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    • That's a lot of lying. 5-27-2014 9:59pm
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    • You need a new game plan for next year. 5-27-2014 10:00pm
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    • Take away the wii, take awAy the tablet. Hire a sitter. 5-27-2014 10:01pm
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      • Op: did the first two. Third one is harder. 5-27-2014 10:03pm
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        • can you afford it? hire a college kid for $13hr from 3-6pm 5-27-2014 10:06pm
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    • Op: and he is ruining my evening with my dh. One of us is always so pissed that we remain pissed for the rest of the evening. 5-27-2014 10:07pm
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      • not saying this to be mean, but he sounds a little troubled. that amount of lying isn't normal. what is your usual tack regarding discipline? do you think he feels shamed by you>...(more) 5-27-2014 10:11pm
        the lying makes me think he's desperate to avoid your disapproval.
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    • PARENT YOUR KID 7-10-2014 12:02am
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  17. Elementary Tv and stupid parenting...(more) 5-26-2014 8:41pm (2 replies)
    Screw all the idiots that would rather blame the TV for how kids come out than taking responsibility for the fact that they were probably just shitty parents that let the TV babysit anyways. We just bought our son a Roadrunner DVD and it says right on it that it's not appropriate for children and is meant for grown collectors. Retards! We were raised on those cartoons. They're harmless. Meant to be outlandish and silly. Way better than the crap they feed kids now... Spongebob. You have to be kidding me. STOP BLAMING THE TV FOR YOUR BAD PARENTING YOU IDIOTS!
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    • Random 5-26-2014 8:46pm
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      • not really......(more) 5-26-2014 8:51pm
        it's parents like most of them on this site that are too dumb to realize that if you let the t.v. raise your kid, of course they're going to be dumb but you can't take away the simple things that are out there just to make kids laugh and then they approve things like spongebob... which is actually harmful.
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  18. Elementary What shrubs/bushes can i put in front of my house that are low maintanace? I live in upstate new york. I cant take care of plants. or spell. 5-24-2014 4:01pm (8 replies)
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    • boxwoods are good. 5-24-2014 4:02pm
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      • dislike? we have them - they require almost nothing. gosh, it isn't like I said juniper. 5-24-2014 4:06pm
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        • they are hideous...how to you trim them? into big meatballs? squares? blobs? boxwoods are the worst 5-24-2014 4:17pm
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          • we keep them natural, not shaped. 5-24-2014 4:27pm
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    • Hosta 5-24-2014 4:03pm
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      • these are not shrubs. these are perennials. 5-24-2014 4:05pm
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    • mountain laurel, winterberry, huckleberry 5-24-2014 4:06pm
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    • Op: we did a mini Japanese maple and a dwarf lilac . And a lot of annuals until those things grow bigger. 5-27-2014 9:56pm
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  19. Elementary I am so lucky. My 9 yo took his wallet to purchase me a 50$ gift for my bday. I didn't let him. I didn't want him spending so much $. He loves me. 5-22-2014 6:55pm (1 reply)
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  20. Elementary I am a poor mom. I am so sad. I feel as if I ruined 2 out of my 3 kids. 5-22-2014 6:44pm (15 replies)
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    • real poor or ybm poor 5-22-2014 6:45pm
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    • Never too late to improve. 5-22-2014 6:45pm
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    • financially poor? 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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      • no. bad. 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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        • Eh, whose mom hasn't ruined them? 5-22-2014 6:47pm
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    • what happened to the 3rd kid? 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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      • sold into white slavery 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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      • middle child is fine. 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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        • wait, you really think the other 2 are messed up because you are poor? 5-22-2014 6:47pm
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          • no. I'm just a bad mom. 5-22-2014 6:47pm
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            • How so? I think every mom has there good and bad points. 5-22-2014 6:48pm
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              • honestly, I'm just hard on myself. I started working full time 6 weeks ago and feel guilty despite always being here. I think I'm just crazed in general.. I blame myself for...(more) 5-22-2014 6:51pm
                their downfalls. oldest may be ADHD. Always an issue. I pushed my youngest to go to K despite being the youngest in the grade. I expect so much out of them b/c my mother did the same. I came out good but this isn't everything.
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    • Why only 2 of them and not all 3? 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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  21. Elementary What type of tile should I do for my "french country" kitchen backsplash? DH and I are in disagreement. 5-22-2014 6:41pm (0 replies)
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  22. Elementary Does your Kindergarten child read? 5-22-2014 6:40pm (28 replies)
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    • yes. 5-22-2014 6:40pm
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    • This post has been disliked 3 times. showOf course. She isn't retarded. 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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      • That was ugly. 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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        • Dude. Joke. Guess written words can't convey my sarcasm. 5-22-2014 6:42pm
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          • So your k kid doesn't read? 5-22-2014 6:43pm
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          • Guess not. 5-22-2014 6:43pm
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          • I got it. I laughed. You are like Tosh.0. 5-22-2014 6:45pm
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      • ^this really gets 2 likes? really? 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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        • Disheartening. 5-22-2014 6:42pm
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          • 3 now. Is this what YB has come to? 5-22-2014 6:43pm
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      • Omg. Lol. 5-22-2014 6:42pm
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    • Barely 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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    • Yes 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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    • Yes but very basic, sounding out, etc. 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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    • yes. chapter books 5-22-2014 6:41pm
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    • Yes. But it's mostly the See Spot Run stuff. Remedial. 5-22-2014 6:42pm
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    • OP here...I ask b/c my child reads. she is the youngest in the class and I question if I should leave her back. Teacher asked if I wanted to put my dd in summer school despite...(more) 5-22-2014 6:43pm
      her improvement. Not sure if it's a matter of filling up school since we are in a very small district or if she really needs it. This is the first I heard. DD is shy so not sure what she is doing in school. Its the end of the year and I'm a bit upset.
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      • That makes no sense. She's young but reading, why hold her back? 5-22-2014 6:44pm
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      • That sounds like a bad idea. 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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      • I think don't put her in summer school (just read at home and go to library, etc) and send her to 1st. She will be OK. 5-22-2014 6:47pm
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        • I got an email today and was shocked as I was reading with her last night and complimenting her. I think she is shy in school. I have a conference set up. I'm just upset. It...(more) 5-22-2014 6:52pm
          adds more to everyting going on...
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          • Unless you think there is an issue, it is all developmental and personality. Let her be who she is. You need to model a good attitude about this. Good luck. NP 5-22-2014 6:56pm
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    • Yes. at a third grade level, too. 5-22-2014 6:43pm
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    • neither of mine did in K- both were reading well in 1st. 5-22-2014 6:44pm
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    • yes, he was a fluent reader at the beginning of K, actually. 5-22-2014 6:46pm
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      • so was mine prior to K. Now he has reading comprehension issues. Go figure. 5-22-2014 6:53pm
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        • I believe it. They get very used to not understanding what they read. 5-22-2014 6:55pm
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  23. Elementary Funded SN schools 5-22-2014 11:32am (0 replies)
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  24. Elementary Any SAB Moms of boys on? 5-20-2014 10:38pm (0 replies)
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  25. Elementary 10yo DD is not receptive to any facts of life discussion so I haven't pushed it. But this evening she disappeared with the laptop and I found searches about sex in the search...(more) 5-20-2014 10:37pm (6 replies)
    history later. How to handle? (And yes I know. Rule is no laptop unless adult is around. She broke rule and was punished for that)
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    • I would give an age appropriate book and leave door open for discussion 5-20-2014 10:38pm
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      • OP: Forgot to say that I've done that. I'm more worried now about the sneaky internet research while being so closed to learning from me. 5-20-2014 10:39pm
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    • Give her the American Girl book 5-20-2014 10:40pm
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    • Does she have a life science module in school? My 10yo just started hers 5-20-2014 10:41pm
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    • So what if she searched for sex? She's trying to learn on her own. Leave the poor girl alone 5-20-2014 10:43pm
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      • I would open the discussion and tell her you'd like to inform her and answer her questions. 5-21-2014 9:14pm
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